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post #1 of 3 (permalink) Old 03-10-2011, 05:31 AM Thread Starter
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Video games almost ruined my marriage.

where do i begin. My husband is obssessed with video games. Mostley his PS3. He would sit and play on it until wee hours in the morning while I was asleep. At this time I was a full time college student and worked 40+ hours a week. During this time, my husband and I were also trying to get into better shape by losing some weight. I at the time had lost 75 pounds and he had lost 45 pounds. We felt great about our selves. Before this we gained a bunch of weight after our beautiful 2yr died in a tragic accident. We were both deeply depressed, slept all day and stayed up all night. I'm giving to details of my story so I can get some advice on what to do......heres my situation. My husband is addicted to his PS3 and a game called modern warfare 2. It has ruined my marriage. He would stay up on it all day and all night while i was at school and work. When I would arrive home from work he would still be on it. After an hour of being home from working night shift, he would try and rush me to bed so he could get back on and play. This would cause constant arguements and fights no stop. This was an everyday thing. One day my husband wasnt home so i looked on his PS3 to see what he was doing on there, because I knew you could recieve messages from other people. To my surprise I found 3 different women talking to my husband. One was sending him pictures, which I couldnt figure out how to open them and the other two were flirting with him. One woman really upset me. She sent my husband a message stating that she wasnt a tease she was just having fun. This made my stomach drop. I was so upset. I asked my husband about this message and of course he said he had no idea who she was. I then left my husband for 3 days to get away from him. I never thought in a million years my husband would even talk to another woman in that way. If u knew my husband you would understand. He's def not like most men. Well I thought anyways. After 3 days I returned home. I tried to forget it. Jan-2011 It was almost time for work and I was getting into the shower when I discovered a magazine sticking out from above the cabinet. I climbed up onto the bathroom and retched up to see what was up there, and I found a cell phone. I reconized the phone and did'nt think it would even turn on, but it did. First I looked through the messages. And seen where he was talking to several women he had met on his PS3. I then looked at the pictures, there were pictures of women, womens breast, womens crotches and even pictures he had sent to them. I was devistated. He had even been calling them behind my back. I didnt confront my husband at first because I didnt want to believe it. I then left for work a mess. This story goes on and on...we sold his PS3 in Jan and he is begging for another one. I cant trust him. What do I do. Just writing all of this makes me want to leave him all over again. I cant stop thinking about what hes done. It makes me sick, and I get so mad when I look at him. What sould I do?????[/SIZE][/FONT]

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post #2 of 3 (permalink) Old 03-10-2011, 10:21 AM
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Re: Video games almost ruined my marriage.

I totally know where you are coming from . My H was addicted in 2005 for Halo 2 and I begged and begged for him to stop and pay attention to me ! I ended up leaving him

We got back together and now he is walking out on me cause of hurt and pain I caused HIM when I left ! He doesn't get that I left cause of his actions !

Anyways, I wouldn't let one in the house. They are addicting and he is more then likely missing the women and not the game ! It is a bad cycle .
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post #3 of 3 (permalink) Old 03-17-2011, 02:43 PM
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Re: Video games almost ruined my marriage.

The console isn't what's to blame here. Yeah it might seem I'm biased because I am a big gamer, but I can honestly tell you that when I've gone through some traumatic moments in my life that gaming saved me. Whether it be a death in the family, me being abandoned when pregnant because I wouldn't cave and have an abortion, finding out the person I was in love with met, married, and was expecting a child with another woman... I could go on and on. Gaming was an escape for me, a means to where I could take my time and process everything in a way that was healthy for me.

You say that you both went through a traumatic period where you had the unfortunate loss of a child. I feel for you, I really do. I have a daughter who is about to turn 8 and I used to have horrible dreams where she would either die or be dead and I would see a coffin. It's a terrible thing and no parent should have to suffer through that.

I want you to know that in no way do I think that the lady situation is acceptable, however don't blame gaming. If that is something your husband wanted, he would've gone out and done it through Facebook, Twitter, Myspace, online dating sites.. wherever. It just so happens that, because he was spending so much time on the PS3, that he met women and then it happened. I will say that there is a certain allure about a woman that games. I get it all the time, and I think nothing of it. There is such a thing as harmless flirting but if hidden cell phones, pictures, and other things are involved then it is hardly harmless.

If you do get a new console, there are parental controls you can set up on them that will prevent him from either going online, from playing games that are of a certain ESRB rating, and more. It's meant for parents who want to put up barriers for their children. If he objects, tell him that you are willing to compromise by allowing the console in the home but that, for now, there will be certain limitations. If he objects, then it isn't so much about having a PS3 as it is about the online interaction and the ladies. If he is determined to contact them, he will find other means.

Or... you could always get a Wii instead. There aren't a lot of online games, interaction with other people is sparse, and it's something the two of you can do together.
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