Women - what's your sex drive like? - Page 7 - Talk About Marriage
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View Poll Results: Women, what is your normal desire for sex?
Daily or more? 22 17.05%
5-6 times a week? 16 12.40%
3-5 times a week? 52 40.31%
1-2 times a week? 28 21.71%
1 time every two weeks? 2 1.55%
1 time every 3 weeks? 3 2.33%
1 time a month? 2 1.55%
Less than 1 time a month? 1 0.78%
Never want sex? 3 2.33%
Voters: 129. You may not vote on this poll

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post #91 of 213 (permalink) Old 12-08-2014, 04:20 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Women - what's your sex drive like?

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I hear that, I do and I'm trying to work on some things.

Yet, if I suddenly lost my drive for the rat race and got a job at Lowes or wherever at a sixth or less of my current salary I think she'd be pretty pissed off, hell she does better than avg. Sell the house and live on her salary at a job she despises for a while
I'm confused by this, what does this have to do with your wife being LD?


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post #92 of 213 (permalink) Old 12-08-2014, 04:42 PM
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Re: Women - what's your sex drive like?

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Originally Posted by Cletus View Post
For you women with daily or near-daily sex: are you primarily active desire or reactive desire types? Do you find yourself wanting it that frequently, or do you get in the mood after starting? How does that affect the amount of time you devote to sex?
Both. It depends on a number of things. I would say I am typically active desire and will initiate fairly often, but on the other days when I'm not the one to initiate, my husband can easily get me into the mood(so long as I have some energy/sanity left). He knows how to kiss my neck, play with my hair, give a massage, etc to start things up. The amount of time devoted to sex depends on when in the day we're having sex(during my son's nap is always a quickie vs night time can be longer).
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post #93 of 213 (permalink) Old 12-08-2014, 05:18 PM
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Re: Women - what's your sex drive like?

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I'm confused by this, what does this have to do with your wife being LD?
Symbolic M / F divide. F - a,b,c,d, and e are wrong with my life, you expect sex?. M - I work my ass off to provide 3/4 of your lifestyle and there is little sex why? Problems from both sides, but I am detracting from your thread
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post #94 of 213 (permalink) Old 12-08-2014, 05:22 PM
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Re: Women - what's your sex drive like?

I have a very high sex drive... which is unfortunate for me right now. My divorce was final last November and aside from a few times during our false R, I am not having sex.

I miss physical touch and the release of sex more than I miss him. but I can't bring myself to seek out one night stands or sex for sex sake. I am just praying that God brings an amazing man into my life SOON so I can resume my mid 40s sex circus.

For now... I take care of myself.. frequently.
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post #95 of 213 (permalink) Old 12-08-2014, 06:02 PM
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Re: Women - what's your sex drive like?

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For you women with daily or near-daily sex: are you primarily active desire or reactive desire types? Do you find yourself wanting it that frequently, or do you get in the mood after starting? How does that affect the amount of time you devote to sex?
I'll stick with current history.

In the past year (+/-), I have primarily initiated sex. Say, 95% of the time.

So, it's active.

I mean; asking your H if you can please go down on him. Pathetic , right?
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post #96 of 213 (permalink) Old 12-08-2014, 06:06 PM
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I'll stick with current history.

In the past year (+/-), I have primarily initiated sex. Say, 95% of the time.

So, it's active.

I mean; asking your H if you can please go down on him. Pathetic , right?
OUCH! And again I say OUCH!
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post #97 of 213 (permalink) Old 12-08-2014, 06:09 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Women - what's your sex drive like?

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Symbolic M / F divide. F - a,b,c,d, and e are wrong with my life, you expect sex?. M - I work my ass off to provide 3/4 of your lifestyle and there is little sex why? Problems from both sides, but I am detracting from your thread
It's a generalization/stereo type that makes both men and women look bad. It assumes that women are entitled emotional pits who contribute almost nothing to a marriage and men are ever-slaving dunderheads who think sex is owed in exchange for their contribution to a marriage.

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post #98 of 213 (permalink) Old 12-08-2014, 06:36 PM
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Re: Women - what's your sex drive like?

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Originally Posted by intheory View Post
(I had to look up "300" movie )

MoE, I don't think so.

When men hear about women wanting sex often; there may be a tendency to visualize a Pamela-Anderson-ish type of woman. 'Cause that is what you are conditioned to see as "sexy"

A lot of women who love sex are ordinary looking (not ugly), just everyday type women. Women you may overlook time and time again. I very much doubt people who look at me think "sex". (I get kind of a thrill out of that )

I'm not condemning you. I realize guys are indoctrinated by these images of pin-up type gals their whole lives.

And maybe the best looking women do insist on the best looking, richest men. Which, I suppose, is their prerogative. I wouldn't know.

I don't know. I would just encourage men to think "outside the box", as to what kind of women they approach. Especially if what you have done so far hasn't gotten you the "love and affection" you desire.

Maybe I'm way off-base. Just putting it out there.
Exactly I am rather serious, calm person on the outside, only those who know me better know that there is devil lurking behind responsible citizen, lol.

Sometimes during the girls night out (or in) we play bottle, so of course there is a lot of questions about sex. You would be surprise to see that the hottest and seemingly most adventorous of us seem often the most traditional, listening with big eyes to the more average crowd

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post #99 of 213 (permalink) Old 12-08-2014, 06:40 PM
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Re: Women - what's your sex drive like?

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"Normal" was maybe the wrong word to use in that sentence. I meant average.

The women in my family say sex is disgusting and gross. Sometimes when watching a movie or a tv series with my mother, if there happens to be a sex related scene in it she will often say "yuck! that disgusting" and turn her head away.

I think this is probably a pretty common attitude to sex among women(that its disgusting), or atleast more common than that it's "good".
strange. I do not know any woman who would react like this. But ifyou watching this with mother or mother in law, that's a little harder.

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post #100 of 213 (permalink) Old 12-08-2014, 06:50 PM
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Re: Women - what's your sex drive like?

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strange. I do not know any woman who would react like this. But ifyou watching this with mother or mother in law, that's a little harder.
Actually, that's very nearly the reaction my wife has to a steamy sex scene in a movie, minus the out-loud exclamation. It was so obvious my grown children even remarked on how uncomfortable mom was with even mainstream depictions of sexuality in cinema.

It's also her reaction to anything other than plain vanilla sex - you ask her what she thinks about oral sex, giving or receiving, and the answer is that it makes her sick to her stomach to consider it.

So they exist. Outside of your experience, perhaps, but not mine.

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post #101 of 213 (permalink) Old 12-08-2014, 07:10 PM
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Re: Women - what's your sex drive like?

For the women who primarily don't initiate sex but who would like it more often, do you think your husbands know you'd like to more often?

The reason I ask? I usually initiate and she's generally ready and willing. Could be a quickie, could be slow and sweet, or it could be role play, or even rough on occasion. I assume she's happy with what we do since there are no complaints. But we're only 1-2 times a week because that's about all I'm amped up for.

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post #102 of 213 (permalink) Old 12-08-2014, 07:13 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Women - what's your sex drive like?

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For the women who primarily don't initiate sex but who would like it more often, do you think your husbands know you'd like to more often?

The reason I ask? I usually initiate and she's generally ready and willing. Could be a quickie, could be slow and sweet, or it could be role play, or even rough on occasion. I assume she's happy with what we do since there are no complaints. But we're only 1-2 times a week because that's about all I'm amped up for.
When things were going good in marriage, I don't think either of us initiated.... or maybe it was that we both initiated at the same time. It was just always right there so all that was needed was privacy.

When things went down hill.. I initiated and he had no interest.

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post #103 of 213 (permalink) Old 12-08-2014, 07:23 PM
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Women - what's your sex drive like?

My wife initiates at least 35% of the time since she started on the peri-menopause journey. Prior that she would initiate maybe 25% of the time. I don't know if it was a change in her hormonal architecture, or that as she got older she got more confident and or if as the kids got older and more independent she felt less stress on the child rearing front.

It is interesting because you hear conflicting stories during this cycle of life. And even from what I know physiologically, both scenarios could make sense, increase or decrease drive.
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post #104 of 213 (permalink) Old 12-08-2014, 07:59 PM
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Re: Women - what's your sex drive like?

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For you women with daily or near-daily sex: are you primarily active desire or reactive desire types? Do you find yourself wanting it that frequently, or do you get in the mood after starting? How does that affect the amount of time you devote to sex?
Now that I have tasted of that euphoric RUSH we had.... knowing so much of sex is in between the ears....realizing all we need to do is work it up ...... the kissing, reaching, some flirting through the day...it's just where we both want to go.. a mutual known. ...something we want to Keep alive... after we get started.. we are feeling it...

We always shut the kids out after 8 pm.... sometimes he may sleep a few hours...& we'll have a romp in the am ... his days off.. we take it slow....change it up...the house to ourselves..

That whole thing.. "Use it or Loose it".. he's not going to loose it !

The euphoria of how exciting that RUSH was lives on in me... and so far, we keep recapturing it.. Physical intimacy... it's just something that never grows old.

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Thundarr said: For the women who primarily don't initiate sex but who would like it more often, do you think your husbands know you'd like to more often?
Even in what I would call my "repressed" days.. wanting a sheet, the lights dim.. If I was feeling it.. I was soooo obvious...rocking into him.. grab the gear shift...very overt about it.. he always knew if he waited it out, I'd be coming on to him...
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post #105 of 213 (permalink) Old 12-08-2014, 08:26 PM
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Re: Women - what's your sex drive like?

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Even in what I would call my "repressed" days.. wanting a sheet, the lights dim.. If I was feeling it.. I was soooo obvious...rocking into him.. grab the gear shift...very overt about it.. he always knew if he waited it out, I'd be coming on to him...
poor guy .

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