major misfit

Im having to post from my phone now thanks to a nasty virus that crashed my pc. Please bear with my lack of correct punctuation, etc.

I had to step away for a bit...i was becoming someone less than i wanted to be..and that was unacceptable for me personally.

So much has been going on. My grown children giving me fits. My oldest DD having an affair with a guy she went to elem school with. Leaving her husband and moving in with him. Not a month goes by and she realizes she's made a mistake and moves back with her husband...just this weekend. She drags her autistic 2yo son through this turmoil.

My mentally ill DD's life is still spinning out of control.

My MIL's cancer, treatment, hospital stays, and everythingvthat's gone on with that. Thank goodness her cancer is highly treatable and her prognosis is excellent. This is going to sound horrible, and i'm FAR from being the only person that thinks this...but she's wearing the "cancer patient" like a badge.

Shes had her youngest son quit his job and move here (small town that he HATES) and we can't figure out why yet.

She won't let him drive her to treatment, bc she doesn't like his driving. Only myself or my SO will do.

She won't let him do stuff like mowing bc they don't want him touching their Husquavarna. Only my SO will do.

She's stated emphatically that when she's cured, she's going to keep shaving her head (she didn't lose her hair...she shaved it) and keep wearing the scarf bc people are "nicer to" her.

I could go on and on, but it's enough. I have an illness where stress alone can make me sick. I spent 3 days in the hospital bc of all this crap.

My poor SO can't even enjoy a weekend without someone, somewhere needing/wanting something.

All we have right now are my son's baseball games...and my SO lives for those. We had tourneys all weekend and "they" tried to take that, too.

He had enough and started saying "no". And guess what? They all managed wo him.

Ive missed everyone. Hope i can stay.
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greenpearl

Welcome back!

I like the attitude you have, when you feel that you are becoming someone you don't like, you examine yourself, and try to change the direction.

I think we all face challenges in life. If we are strong, we beat life. If we are not, we let life beat us!

I think you are the one who beats life!

credamdóchasgra

Im sorry you've gone through so much these days!
Thank God your MIL's prognosis is good, but wish she wasn't being such a pain..
You're a strong lady. We're glad to have you back.
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sisters359

One of the best things I did for myself was, I took 6 months and said "no" to every request--I didn't have kids then, of course

BUT, it broke me of "yes" as my default answer. I learned to pause and think, is this something I want to do? Is this someone who cannot manage without me (and rarely is that true)? Of course, I had to take drastic measures b/c at the time I was just tooooo nice. Ha, boy, did I change!

This is all by way of saying, "no" is fine. Use it. Embrace it. You know what will help and you know what is just a desperate attempt in the place of things that NEED to happen to help whomever it is asking for help.

Of course, I do not have a child spinning out of control. I cannot imagine how hard that is--I know I've said that before, and I am in no way (get it, "no" way? haha) trying to say I have the answers. I'm just throwing ideas your way because it's always nice to have another opinion.

I'm really glad you and your son and your SO have baseball. Sounds like a lovely way to spend time together, and you deserve that!

Prayers heading your way!

827Aug

So sorry things have not been going well. Hang in there......we're glad you are back though!

Snooring

Sorry for what has and happening to you. Things will be ok.

I have been reading many of your posts. You are very wisdom, calm and undersatanding and handle things very well!

Welcome back

MarriedWifeInLove

Glad to see you back.

I was actually thinking about you just yesterday and the fact that I hadn't seen you post anything in a while and was wondering what was up.

I know all about being overwhelmed - I feel ya.

Hopefully things will even out and you and everyone will feel better in the long run.

Glad to see ya!

__________________
"Don't Find Fault - Find A Remedy" Henry Ford