Just confessed my feelings to my best friend
Long story short, I confessed my true feelings to my best friend a couple days ago. I have known her for almost 7 years, but have never lived in the same city. We've always had a more than just friend type connection, but our circumstances never really allowed us to pursue it.
I recently visited her and she was telling me about her ex that had full intentions to marry her. She wants to get married within several years and he seems like a great guy so she was undergoing the dilemma of whether or not to give him the chance and work things out. At the time, I believed the right thing to do was to convince her to give him the chance so that's what I did.
During the couple weeks I was back home, it was killing me to think that I'd lose the one person that truly matters to me to another person. I thought long and hard during that time and I realized that she was the one that I wanted and needed to spend the rest of my life with.
It's a little sad that I kind of missed my timing and took a little bit of jealousy to see past our friendship, but I finally mustered up the courage and told her how I really felt. Unfortunately, we weren't exactly on the same page. After all, I had just convinced her to give another guy a chance. Anyhow, at this point she's really confused. I guess she's weighing the two of us. I know it was a bad move on my part to get in between like this right now, but I knew that I'd regret it for the rest of my life if I didn't.
I told her that whatever she decided I am with her and if she decides that I am not the one, I promised to never think of her as I do now but always be there for her as her friend. I intend to keep this promise.
I've been trying to think of ways to make her feel more comfortable in the off chance that she decides that I'm not her one. I've been thinking about telling her that this was all a test for her to be able to see if she truly wanted to marry her ex. If she were to ask "what if I chose you?", I'd jokingly tell her that we would have just gotten married. She's honestly not stupid enough to believe this story, but if she did, would she feel like I messed with her head and be angry? Or do you think she'd be more pleased that I helped her (in a twisted way) realize that she really wanted to be with this guy?
Getting over her will be difficult for me, but because I put this burden on her I want to be able to take it away from her as fast as I can.