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post #61 of 103 (permalink) Old 07-06-2016, 05:14 PM
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Re: Appropriate Dress To A Wedding And Bullying

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Originally Posted by EleGirl View Post
Jeans as a t-shirt are not equivalent to the dress that the woman in the OP is wearing.

I tried finding an outfit on a man that would be equivalent.
I agree. Perhaps some photos that my gay cousin's boyfriend posts on Facebook would be a good example? He's a fashion model, and has posts of his shoots up all the time.

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post #62 of 103 (permalink) Old 07-06-2016, 05:28 PM
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Re: Appropriate Dress To A Wedding And Bullying

OK I've done some research & this is what proper wedding guest attire for ladies should be....

According to the magazine the lady should not show cleavage & not wear a length of the dress that is too short or too long.


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post #63 of 103 (permalink) Old 07-06-2016, 05:33 PM
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Re: Appropriate Dress To A Wedding And Bullying

The whole thing looks like a media grab to me. Never heard of the woman in the OP but it comes across as she was seeking attention for her online image. I doubt she had drinks spilled on her or her arse smacked by other women. She went with the intention of causing a scene.

It would be a great dress for a party or nightclub but not a wedding.
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post #64 of 103 (permalink) Old 07-06-2016, 05:45 PM
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Re: Appropriate Dress To A Wedding And Bullying

I agree that it's not appropriate, but I don't see how ****-shaming women for inappropriate garb is helpful in any way. THAT definitely would be more disruptive to a wedding than wearing the wrong dress. I'm sure the people whose wedding it was probably saw it that way too. Also agree it was possibly a media grab or attempt to drum up business. But at least she's focusing on encouraging others to volunteer or be kind. A lot of social media is focused on the right bikini or similar horses$@%.

Some people don't really understand etiquette. While it's important, it's not something that everybody grew up with. For all we know, she is a self-starter or had a crappy childhood and what-to-wear-to-weddings was further down on her priority list than, say, making a living, paying her bills, helping others live strong, healthy lives and that sort of thing. Personally, I think she looks amazing. She obviously works hard on her body.
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post #65 of 103 (permalink) Old 07-06-2016, 05:47 PM
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Re: Appropriate Dress To A Wedding And Bullying

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Appropriate wedding wear? HELZ no. She looks like a slvt. That said, treating someone like a slvt just because they look like one isn't acceptable either. Was she acting like a slvt? Because then I can *maybe* see getting her azz slapped.
I'm sure glad, as a man, that I didn't say that.
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post #66 of 103 (permalink) Old 07-06-2016, 06:55 PM
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Re: Appropriate Dress To A Wedding And Bullying

I'm more inclined to feel it's inappropriate if the ceremony was in a church. Otherwise I suppose, like an author, she might due well to know her audience. At a reception or post ceremony party I see no problem with it.

Ps - I like people who are fit and can wear such things. She works hard for it.
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post #67 of 103 (permalink) Old 07-06-2016, 07:22 PM
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Re: Appropriate Dress To A Wedding And Bullying

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The whole thing looks like a media grab to me. Never heard of the woman in the OP but it comes across as she was seeking attention for her online image. I doubt she had drinks spilled on her or her arse smacked by other women. She went with the intention of causing a scene.

It would be a great dress for a party or nightclub but not a wedding.
For all we know, she never even went to a wedding, and had her ass slapped in a club.

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post #68 of 103 (permalink) Old 07-06-2016, 09:21 PM
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Not exactly appropriate for a wedding but I've seen women wearing similar at a few weddings in the past. It doesn't really shock me.
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post #69 of 103 (permalink) Old 07-07-2016, 05:52 AM
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Re: Appropriate Dress To A Wedding And Bullying

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The bolded is the part that is fascinating to me. There is no doubt that in general women face a ton more scrutiny in society/media over their appearance, yet the harshest critics appear to in many cases come from other women.
Generally, women who are unattractive to a man are effectively invisible. So it stands to reason why most men won't notice.

ETA...... and therefore, don't react.

Women generally are the gatekeepers of any society.

Last edited by NextTimeAround; 07-07-2016 at 06:04 AM.
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post #70 of 103 (permalink) Old 07-07-2016, 06:19 AM
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Re: Appropriate Dress To A Wedding And Bullying

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I'm sure glad, as a man, that I didn't say that.
Proves how women are 10 times worse to other women then men are.


Stop complaining about what you don't have...start enjoying what you do have.
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post #71 of 103 (permalink) Old 07-07-2016, 11:25 AM
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Re: Appropriate Dress To A Wedding And Bullying

She looks great but she looks like she's going to a club not a wedding.
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post #72 of 103 (permalink) Old 07-07-2016, 12:07 PM
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Re: Appropriate Dress To A Wedding And Bullying

I'm glad I'm not the only one who thought she was a trans man!

Seriously though, at most weddings I've attended she'd have been escorted off premises, and ridiculed. Which she would have deserved for her behavior.

It must take some serious madness to behave this way, and then whine about being judged for it. We are all judged rightly based on how we behave, and this is behavior. I would argue that dressing like this to a wedding screams volumes about her as a person.

I can think of a similar situation at a funeral with a cousin, where myself and 2 others literally dragged him off of the premises of his own mother's funeral, drove him home and forced him to change clothes.

Respect and humility are lovely things. This woman and my cousin from my example lack either.

Do you hear the people sing / Lost in the valley of the night?
It is the music of a people / Who are climbing to the light.
For the wretched of the earth / There is a flame that never dies.
Even the darkest night will end / And the sun will rise...
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post #73 of 103 (permalink) Old 07-07-2016, 12:35 PM
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Re: Appropriate Dress To A Wedding And Bullying

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Seriously though, at most weddings I've attended she'd have been escorted off premises, and ridiculed. Which she would have deserved for her behavior.
Perhaps it's a regional difference, or the company I keep, but I'm glad that most of the weddings to which I would be invited wouldn't be populated with people who felt it was incumbent upon them to do either.

Dress code Nazis at weddings? How American.
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post #74 of 103 (permalink) Old 07-07-2016, 12:54 PM
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Re: Appropriate Dress To A Wedding And Bullying

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Perhaps it's a regional difference, or the company I keep, but I'm glad that most of the weddings to which I would be invited wouldn't be populated with people who felt it was incumbent upon them to do either.

Dress code Nazis at weddings? How American.
I'm sure it is partly cultural, a regional difference if you will.

In the culture in which I was raised, no one but your own mama has the authority to snatch you up and march you home to change. The scene caused by anyone else daring to do so would be even more anathema than the original offense of dressing like you lacked proper raising. However, if your mama (or another suitable matriarch, in dire cases) is not in attendance, then rest assured, you will be left entirely free to behave as you wish. Oh, everyone will be blessing your heart the remainder of the evening, and you will very likely find similar invitations in short supply in future. But, no, no one would dream of asking you to leave or change.

You'll find that many of the truths we cling to depend greatly upon our own point of view. - Obi Wan Kenobi
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post #75 of 103 (permalink) Old 07-07-2016, 01:21 PM
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Re: Appropriate Dress To A Wedding And Bullying

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I'm thinking the prohibition against "judging" comes from the not too distant past, when most Americans (not sure about other places), were familiar with the Biblical admonition from Jesus "to judge not, lest ye be judged".

Which is spiritual judgement; and most of us are not qualified to judge someone's spiritual worthiness, or whatever you want to label it.

Somehow, this morphed into "you can't ever make a judgement about anyone or anything, no matter what the circumstance".
Very good post and logical conclusion. You are probably correct.


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And that, as you pointed out, would lead to chaos.
True. If we didn't make judgements about people's actions and behaviors, our minds would just be numb and void of any reasoning ability. We wouldn't be able to make any decisions about anything people related. If 10 people applied for a job and all their credentials were equal, there would be no way to hire anybody among them, because beyond their credentials, the interviewer's mind would be void of any other abilities to make the judgement.

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I hardly ever judge anyone's character (few people I know well enough to even make the attempt). But I DO judge their actions and behavior. And will continue to do so. And I expect them to "judge" me; for all their politically correct insistence that they are above judging anyone.
I agree.

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Most people are all for "judging", if the judgment agrees with their value system, or falls in their favor.
Once again, very true.

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