female 48 years old and lost my sex drive?
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Old 11-14-2011, 02:57 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Default female 48 years old and lost my sex drive?

Anyone else that is female adult that has a sex drive all their live and lost it? I mean I have no desire. I have lost desire for other things too.

I have never lost my sex drive before that is so completely gone. I am married and we both are sexy, healthly, and attractive adults. so thinking outside the bos - I think about other men or even women as a stretch - and still have no sex drive at all. No fantastes about anything either.

What happened to me? Any females have advice?
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Old 11-14-2011, 04:49 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Default Re: female 48 years old and lost my sex drive?

How long has it been gone? Mine comes and goes at this age, but so far it always returns and with a vengeance! Maybe you'll bounce back. Try not to dwell on it.
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Old 11-15-2011, 11:59 AM   #3 (permalink)
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Default Re: female 48 years old and lost my sex drive?

Thanks. I am hoping it comes back with a veneance.
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Old 11-15-2011, 12:00 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Default Re: female 48 years old and lost my sex drive?

It has been about eight months. I had maybe two times since that I was a little bit interested, but not with a vengeance.
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Old 11-15-2011, 01:32 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Default Re: female 48 years old and lost my sex drive?

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I think about other men or even women as a stretch - and still have no sex drive at all. No fantastes about anything either.
I do not understand this comment, you ARE thinking about other men/women -then you say you have no fantasies?

Have you tried reading a steamy romance, does this move you at all?

How about Romantic Movie with some erotic scenes-- nothing?


I think all men wish they could come out with a lust pill for women. I do feel it starts in the brain, but you need to have the right ****tail of hormones to allow it to do its magic, then be aroused by your husband or book, film, whatever.

Hormones, Sexuality, and Lifeó How Do Lust and Love Change With Age? — OBG Management
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Old 11-15-2011, 10:22 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Default Re: female 48 years old and lost my sex drive?

I'm a bit older than you (52) but I've lost my sex drive/desire as well. It's been getting worse and worse for about a year, to the point where I actually dread sex with my husband. I thought initially it was because we were having some issues, but in the past I've always been able to look beyond those issues.

My husband wants sex a lot ... in fact, he'd like it daily if he could get me to agree. Mostly I just give him a bj to get it over with, and then I feel miserable.

I don't have any answers, but I'm sure open to ideas.
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Old 11-20-2011, 07:14 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Default Re: female 48 years old and lost my sex drive?

I didn't say I'd lost interest in other things, however I am currently being treated for depression. My husband is well aware of my depression and treatment, yet he never brings it up. He doesn't ask how I'm feeling, doesn't show any interest in it at all. Frankly the only thing he seems interested in is himself and sex.
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Old 11-20-2011, 08:47 PM   #8 (permalink)
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Default Re: female 48 years old and lost my sex drive?

Take up some sport programs. Exercise. Join a gym and build up your muscle mass. Get buff.

Wean yourself off the medication for depression. Loss of libido is a side-effect of antidepressants. Go see a compassionate doctor to help you get off the medication -- you'll need to shop around till you find one that does not believe in sedating you via pills.

Get some individual counseling to find and deal with your source of depression. It may be medically related. Then find a skillful doctor that can help pinpoint the source.

There are more suggestions but these should do for now.
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Old 11-20-2011, 09:28 PM   #9 (permalink)
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Default Re: female 48 years old and lost my sex drive?

Why are you hoping it comes back? Many wives would be thrilled to be in your position as long as their husband went along.
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Old 11-20-2011, 11:11 PM   #10 (permalink)
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Default Re: female 48 years old and lost my sex drive?

My W is 49, she lost hers a couple years ago. HRT has helped a LOT. A LOT. Including testosterone.


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It has been about eight months. I had maybe two times since that I was a little bit interested, but not with a vengeance.
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Old 11-21-2011, 02:28 PM   #11 (permalink)
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Default Re: female 48 years old and lost my sex drive?

Yup, I went from having a sex drive that was higher than the average male's (at least males over the age of 22, lol) to nothing, as a result of menopause.

No interest, no thoughts, no fantasies, no drive, no sexual response -- it was like someone snipped a critical wire somewhere in me. I couldn't believe it would ever happen like that to me, figured I'd be the Energizer Bunny forever.

My family doc reluctantly prescribed estrogen replacement for me but drew the line at testosterone replacement, which seems to be what I need at this point.
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Old 11-22-2011, 04:02 PM   #12 (permalink)
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Default Re: female 48 years old and lost my sex drive?

while i am sympathetic to your situation, that is it is apparent that your body has changed and basically you have shut down sexually, what is it any of you expect your husbands to do?

i would think that sitting around helplessly isnt going to improve your sex drive. why not explore all medical possibilites that could help. go get friggin help, dont just believe your a lost cause. thats what my wife has done with her migraines, she got one type of treatment that didnt really help and she just gave up and accepted the headaches, it frustrating
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Old 11-25-2011, 11:03 AM   #13 (permalink)
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The testosterone replacement WORKS. Takes 4-6 weeks to kick in but it is a beautiful thing


I went from having a sex drive that was higher than the average male's (at least males over the age of 22, lol) to nothing, as a result of menopause.

No interest, no thoughts, no fantasies, no drive, no sexual response -- it was like someone snipped a critical wire somewhere in me. I couldn't believe it would ever happen like that to me, figured I'd be the Energizer Bunny forever.

My family doc reluctantly prescribed estrogen replacement for me but drew the line at testosterone replacement, which seems to be what I need at this point.[/QUOTE]
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Old 11-25-2011, 01:40 PM   #14 (permalink)
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Default Re: female 48 years old and lost my sex drive?

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The testosterone replacement WORKS. Takes 4-6 weeks to kick in but it is a beautiful thing
I think it would work too but my doc is super anti-medication (which is normally my view also as I don't believe in popping a pill for every symptom) and there is a massive physician shortage here so I can't shop around.
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Old 11-25-2011, 02:41 PM   #15 (permalink)
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We thought about this for a LONG time. My W is definitely not into pills/meds.
Tell you what though. After YEARS of low/desire or at times no desire the T has been a God send for both of us.

Either be firm with your doctor or drive to the nearest mid sized town.

Ultimately I believe ours doctors are responsible for providing us info not deciding for us.


TE=TwoDogs;492338]I think it would work too but my doc is super anti-medication (which is normally my view also as I don't believe in popping a pill for every symptom) and there is a massive physician shortage here so I can't shop around. [/QUOTE]
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