Just to refocus on part of the original question that has not had many responses . . .
Is anyone here married to a man whose attraction is not affected by your weight, but you wish it were? If so, why?
Ok yeah I guess I sort of missed that. Yes I do believe my H's attraction is not affected by my weight. (It could be, but I won't be gaining anymore weight!)
My attraction is effected by MY weight. If I feel fat or out of shape I don't feel sexy. Therefore I'm less inclined to act sexy or to be the initiator of sex.
So in the long run, even if he is still attracted to me with extra weight, it effects him.
I don't know if I really wish he were different in this area. I think I would want him to be more direct, less afraid to upset me by being honest. Then I would believe him when he acts super attracted to my body and not be tempted to write it off as him 'just being horny' and wanting some.
That being said, I do have self esteem issues and have always found something wrong with my body even when I was 'perfect'.
I imagine he is afraid to trigger my insecurities by saying anything.
But in the end it's what I believe about myself that really matters because he seems very happy with me, from when I was too thin to now, being more curvy and having a belly.
I think you also asked earlier @jld
how it made me feel to consider that he may prefer me bigger.
I actually think it's not a body type for H, just whatever body *I* happen to be in, that he loves.