I think not all wives can "surrender" because their husbands don't have the capacity to lead or dominate or whatever the right word may be. In other words, a surrendered wife can only exist if the man is ready to take on his part of the deal. Not all men can or want to be dominant in a relationship. Nor can all women be surrendered. But, if each of the partners' personalities fits the requirement for this type of dynamic, then I see how it could work for them.
There are many days I wish I could surrender ...
That is true, but at the same time maybe the men have never been given the oppourtunity to lead? Men and women are programmed differently, but this doesnt mean all men are strong and hardworking and all women are homemakers and broody and of course lines are very blurred. but I think once you understand your strengths and weaknesses you understand more about how to fit properly together in a marriage. I really honestly do not feel suppressed in my marriage it works so well now!
I have also met men that are complete jerks and feel that if their wives surrendered they would completely take advantage of them but at the same time I would love to see what would happen if the wife did try surrendering, I mean they can always stop if they dont like it!
I loved my job ! I enjoyed working hard and we all helped do the daily chores this worked well we were all happy tired but happy.
The last two weeks WOW!! Im loving being a stay at home mum , im loving cooking again ,im loving spending quality time with my children, Im even loving doing the house work lol !!! even better i love having everything done so once the kids are in bed i get my husband to myself with out having to mark books and prepare lessons.
I have just finished reading the WHOLE of the book. Many responses here are from people who have read a few of the general points touched in the book. I'm raring to go but feel I cannot surrender the finances of the household since I work in a bank. It would be a bit like getting my husband to do the supermarket shopping if I worked in a supermarket !! Any help from a surrendered ?
If your husband is not good with money, I see no reason why you should surrender your financial control. I'm not sure how well your husband handles finances.
My husband handles the money because he is better with it than I am. I am not currently working because I am a student. When he gives me money to spend on myself, I put some of it away.
I surrender to my husband in the sense that I do not try to dominate over him. He feels respected and loved because I try to listen to his point of view and advice. I appreciate they way my husband also listens to my opinion. Most of the time, I criticize constructively. When I forget, he calmly lets me know that he will not stand for being yelled at or insulted. I immediately apologize and check my tone. My husband would not marry a woman who did not challenge him and ask questions.
I think surrendering is about trusting your husband to make good decisions for your family and your marriage.
My husband is an amazing man. He treats me incredibly well. I am completely OK with submitting to him because he always puts my best interests first. I always have the nicer car despite pushing him to get a new one. I always have the newest equipment and electronic gadgets. He never complains about housework being unfinished and says, "I'm happy with whatever you were able to do today. Don't try to please me. I just want you to be happy." He's just amazing in every way. That said, he's quite an alpha male. He works long hours. He travels. He puts forth 100% effort at work. Sometimes that's hard for me and I complain, but I go along with it because he's the leader. He's providing for our family and doing it his way. He's thinking about starting another company (he isn't providing the capital, just a workplace decision) and I'm not sure about it, but in the end it's his decision. He asks my input and hears my concerns but he'll make the final choice. I trust him to do right by his family.
This is how my marriage is but not by choice, and I can tell you...it does not work. My wife is very submissive, non-confrontational, quiet, does not do well with any kind of conflict...I "have" to make all of the decisions because she won't.
It sucks having to do everything, ALL the time. It is not a partnership.