01-22-2009, 11:33 AM
Join Date: Jan 2009
| | Your perspective is appreciated
I am really trying to be sure that I am not over-reacting to a recent situation with my husband. About a week or so ago, he came home and in the course of a general conversation he mentioned how he made contact through a professional networking website with two co-workers (one male and one female) that he worked with about 9 years ago. The guy lives farther away, while the woman is about 35-40 minutes from where we live.
My husband and I have known each other for over 10 years and have been married for a little over 8 years. When we met, I knew that he was good friends with both of these people, (the guy was the best man at our wedding and he would refer to the woman as a "little sister/big brother" relationship. I have no reason to believe that their past relationship ever had a sexual aspect to it.
So now all of a sudden my husband has been emailing with this woman in particular. He has her cell phone number and has said that they were planning on getting together for lunch sometime.
In the last couple of days I have let him know that I am not comfortable with his "rekindling" of this relationship. He has not talked with this woman in over 8 years, while they are both in the tech field, they do not have job-alikes to share information and contacts. I don't understand his motivation.
We have a good relationship, while like all couples, we have had our minor bumps in the road. I have never had any reason to suspect anything and have trust (although somewhat faltering now) for him, I have no idea what this woman who has been married for over 10 years might have as her motivation.
I have let him know that I am not comfortable with this and do not think it is appropriate for him to re-connect for what would be a relationship he would have with another woman on his own.
He thinks I am over-reacting and being insecure. I would appreciate other's perspective. Thanks.