You make the UNBELIEVABLE assumption that us women who go out once in a blue moon are grinding on some dude and that is our sole purpose for being there. Let me clue you in on what GNO is about....at least in my camp. GETTING AWAY FROM MEN. We want to go out, have fun and dance. It isn't about men, honey. Far from it.
I am going by the OP.
I think GNOs are fine.
The OP said they we going to be out all night, sleep in and were going dancing.
I am not challenging YOUR GNO at all. I am not challanging this GNO as long as it it cool with the couple.
I would be thinking below the waste for sure if I had been drinking a lot and dancing with a very attractive woman who was hell bent on geting me in the sack. I know I cannot play that game. I would not put myself in that situation and am not all gungho with my wife doing that either. Her wanting to do that would be the real issue.
So why am I there again? Why am I dancing with these women? Oh I would just dance with other guys ... right?
I occasionally went to dance clubs in my younger days and often saw women dancing together, frequently in groups of three or four.
I've never, ever seen a group of guys dancing together.
Apples and oranges, my friend.
You continue to make the assumption that a woman goes out dancing with her friends for the sole purpose of being hit/grinded upon. Posted via Mobile Device
Hooters, strip clubs, meat market clubs, sports bars - whatever, the venue isn't the point.
The point is: IF your spouse has an issue with you going there, having the attitude that "I am just going to do whatever I want and to hell with him/her" is disrespectful and detrimental to your relationship. So is the attitude that you are FORBIDDING your spouse from going to said venue. The whole point is that RESPECTFUL spouses discuss these things and come to an agreement on what is comfortable FOR THEM.
I would never forbid my hubby from going to a strip club. But he knows what I think about them and, if he went, would be doing so knowing full well there's going to be an issue involved. So he doesn't go. Thankfully he's not the type to even WANT to go, which is an important value FOR ME in OUR relationship. Obviously it isn't in others relationships. And that's fine.
I do not understand why any woman would go on a GNO knowing full well her husband doesn't approve. For WHATEVER reason. But that's just me.
Exactly! And if a woman finds herself arguing vehemently for the right to go to a night club on the girl's night out, and her husband is opposed, exactly what did the two of them talk about instead while they were deciding to spend the rest of their life together? Maybe instead of talking about what they had in common, and their personal boundaries, they had a nearly endless debate about 8 track tapes as opposed to cassettes. VHS versus beta? Cold fusion? Seriously, there had to be something more pressing to discuss than what they had in common, because the marriage vows still imply a heck of a long time. I moved to a new state and had to spend a lot of time reviewing the implications of a driver's license, and that was only four years. None of these boundary issues came up in marriage discussions?
In my case, my wife is enough of a feminist to be opposed to businesses that objectify women, yet we married long before we even heard of Hooters. I can make simple intellectual connections though, even though I'm a knuckle dragger, and I avoid them out of respect for her.
I hold utmost respect for women who thrive on areas of nightlife and even hobbies that go against my grain. Something tells me that if I seriously dated a woman like this, our discussions about marriage would've naturally excluded each other. We would've probably just listened to my collection of 8 track tapes instead, and parted our ways. I can live with that, and even sleep well. Just don't see the point in coming to a thread like this, where we didn't even talk about the boundaries that the OP established within her marriage, and argue about how wrong each incompatable marriage type is. Guys, just don't marry each other and we can save some precious internet electrons.
If there was a place that women could go to dance without men, I'd be there and NOT a lesbian bar. Hmmmm, perhaps a business venture I should explore.
Why not a "Lesbian" bar? You could stil say "F*&k off, I'm married". I loved GNOs when I was 20. Lot of ladies letting their hair down and forgetting they can't drink like they used to.
Guys go to a sports bar to drink and eat? Please, just spare me. If that were true, a burly ugly man would be serving food and fist pumping the air when "the team" scored. Instead you get "Crystal" who is 20 and shoves her tits in your face when giving you wings and doesn't know a darn thing about "the team".
I don't give a crap what men do at a club. I don't care why they are there either. I care why I am there. To have fun with my married friends and dance, period. Again, why the projection??
Crystal --- Love it.
Now Jade ... that is trouble.
I would have a hard time grabbing the wings with Crytals breasts in my face ... yes. I know, I am a bad person for this.
For it to be a double standard, it has to be similar events that are being treated differently. But you are comparing different things. The wives are not asking to go to the wine bar with the two hot studly bar tenders to serve them. They want to go to a dance club where there are men who want to dance with them while buying them alcohol and hoping to pick them up. Think of it as passive versus active.
If people were arguing that women should not attend the wine bar I described but advocating that men should be able to attend the sports bars you describe, then I agree that would be a double standard. I have not seen that occur.
There have been numerous posts here about this issue. It crops up all the time. Wine bars are still viewed as somehow "bad" for married women because afterall **gasp** alcohol is served there and they are alone. Hooters, sports bars, strip clubs = A-Okay, the excuse being "the women aren't there to pick up the married men". No. But the men SURE are there to pick up the women but somehow that's fine.
So let me ask you, if there are women at a sports bar who flirts with you....should you be barred from ever going? Are you not able to say no, no thanks, married, (points) to ring? Why on Earth do you suppose us unable to do the same? My guess? Women have an easier time turning down sex. Men? Not so much and they put themselves in that situation and make vast assumptions that us women will behave the same. Lordy and
You continue to make the assumption that a woman goes out dancing with her friends for the sole purpose of being hit/grinded upon. Posted via Mobile Device
Well that's my ONLY purpose....to snare a man while my "beta" husband is at home. In order to garner the "alpha" male, I use bacon. I put bacon in my bra, in my underwear and a little grease behind my ears. Works all the time!
Hooters, strip clubs, meat market clubs, sports bars - whatever, the venue isn't the point.
The point is: IF your spouse has an issue with you going there, having the attitude that "I am just going to do whatever I want and to hell with him/her" is disrespectful and detrimental to your relationship. So is the attitude that you are FORBIDDING your spouse from going to said venue. The whole point is that RESPECTFUL spouses discuss these things and come to an agreement on what is comfortable FOR THEM.
I would never forbid my hubby from going to a strip club. But he knows what I think about them and, if he went, would be doing so knowing full well there's going to be an issue involved. So he doesn't go. Thankfully he's not the type to even WANT to go, which is an important value FOR ME in OUR relationship. Obviously it isn't in others relationships. And that's fine.
I do not understand why any woman would go on a GNO knowing full well her husband doesn't approve. For WHATEVER reason. But that's just me.
Don't get me wrong, if my husband had an issue with it...and we are talking MAYBE twice a year, I would not go. I would also have the same free reign on his life though. My point to all this was married men who have an issue with their wives going out, yet do the exact same thing but in a different venue called "guys time" should not expect that their wives are sitting at home, nor is it remotely fair.
Why not a "Lesbian" bar? You could stil say "F*&k off, I'm married". I loved GNOs when I was 20. Lot of ladies letting their hair down and forgetting they can't drink like they used to.
As a former habitue of lesbian bars, your man should be way more wary if your GNOs are there...lol. Posted via Mobile Device
Hooters, strip clubs, meat market clubs, sports bars - whatever, the venue isn't the point.
The point is: IF your spouse has an issue with you going there, having the attitude that "I am just going to do whatever I want and to hell with him/her" is disrespectful and detrimental to your relationship. So is the attitude that you are FORBIDDING your spouse from going to said venue. The whole point is that RESPECTFUL spouses discuss these things and come to an agreement on what is comfortable FOR THEM.
I would never forbid my hubby from going to a strip club. But he knows what I think about them and, if he went, would be doing so knowing full well there's going to be an issue involved. So he doesn't go. Thankfully he's not the type to even WANT to go, which is an important value FOR ME in OUR relationship. Obviously it isn't in others relationships. And that's fine.
I do not understand why any woman would go on a GNO knowing full well her husband doesn't approve. For WHATEVER reason. But that's just me.
Wondermous. A candle in the darkness. This. This is it. Thank you.
Only that you seem to be defending that. I don't think you are.
Men are hairy filthy beasts. -- Some Like It Hot
I am not defending anything, simply saying your stance that all married women who go out to dance are looking to cheat/hook up/get felt up is crap.
You know you and I will never see eye to eye on this so let's just agree that bacon is awesome, okay?
296Likes
Re: The girls night out debacle... 
Baffled.
