daisygirl,
I don't have a crystal ball, and can't tell you with any certainty what the future holds.
That said.... A lot of women your age who are newly single do go on to find relationships, often marriage and many times version 2.0 turns out way better than the first go around.
And a lot of women don't find what they want, and are disappointed, either feeling they "settled" or winding up alone.
What's the difference between which group you'll end up in? basically it's all comes down to you. You can set yourself up for success, or failure (and not even realize it).
You're just coming out of a almost 20 year marriage where he cheated on you, right?
The next big chapter of your life is going take some time to get set up, and you haven't quite finished out the current chapter and epilog yet.
I think at this time, you need to just tell yourself that there is no blocking issue that is going to make your future a lonely one. And then tell yourself to take some time to get yourself in order first. If you're not in good shape and mentally healthy, and have your world together, it's going to be way harder to find and keep good partners who do.
There's an old saying about men and divorce: A Man is no good for the year before and after his divorce. By no good, it means there just a bunch of personal cr*p to process and some things just take time to heal. And time will pass and and life moves on, and you will get to the point to where the chapters separate.
I think that applies to women as much as it does to men.
As a man in his mid-40's I can tell you that when it comes to dating and mating, things have changed since you were last single, both due to the era and your own age. If you want, I could start by giving you my take on the changes, challenges, and ways to go about making yourself desired by best men out there, but I think that's jumping the gun....
First, you need to get clear of the wreckage of your marriage that your hubby threw away for a piece of strange. You need to figure out more about who you are going to be, and how your world is going to work - with your ex, your kids, and everyone else.
Be patient. I can guarantee you that it is possible for you to find love and companionship and a relationship that fulfills each others needs. Find strength in knowing that's possible, and keep taking baby steps forward each and every day to take care the more immediate things.
-A