So my husband has been snoring more and more lately. I'm a very light sleeper so I usually go in my stepson's room when he's with his mom. Tonight we have a full house with three kids a d his parents. His mom is on the upstairs couch. He was snoring SO loud, I had a fan on and ear plugs in and still couldn't sleep. I woke him and asked him to go downstairs and sleep on the couch so I could get a good night's sleep. I have to be up at 6 to go to work. He basically just refused by not answering then got mad because he snores so loud.
I'm fuming. I get to sleep on this crappy ass couch all night when I have to be up in six hours and he doesn't give a rat's ass.
What the f. It's not my fault he snores. Posted via Mobile Device
OMG, I can sympathize with you!! My H snores so loud, I can hear him downstairs, over fans, dogs, kids, et cetera. I seriously don't understand how someone can make that much noise sleeping. Sleep is supposed to be a quiet, peaceful thing, not sound like....whatever that noise is that comes out of him.
And I know all about sleeping on the couch to get away from it. I did it for three years and have the back pain to prove it. Never mattered that, like you, I had to be up in the morning on days when he didn't and I really needed to get some good sleep. He was not going to leave the bed. It was more, "If you don't like it, you sleep downstairs."
I can't figure out why, if they know it's such a problem that we start moving to the couch to avoid it they don't do something about it. I have brought home Breathe Right strips, snoring spray, lozenges, the whole nine yards. He won't use any of it. Of course, my H is passive-aggressive and I'm sure it's just another way he's going to "show me."
I can understand your being ticked off to no end, it's ridiculous how mad they get at US when THEY are the ones snoring. How dare we complain that they are keeping us up. Whatever. Hopefully, though, you will be able to get "some" sleep on the couch, versus the other alternative of tossing and turning all night long in the bed as you contemplate whether you should suffocate him with a pillow or shove a sock in his mouth!!
Your husband probably has sleep apnea. He should go to see a doctor about the snoring and get a sleep test. There are things that can be done.
Sleep apnea is a real health risk.
Absolutely agree with this; the trouble, though, is convincing them that they need to go get it checked out!
My dad snores just as bad and while he was in the hospital recently for a bad bout of pneumonia and hooked up to oxygen 24/7 we noticed that he didn't snore hardly at all. Talked to his family doc, took him for a sleep study, and it was sleep apnea all along. I actually just did a deposition of one of the leading sleep apnea physicians in the country, and it's scary how dangerous sleep apnea can be!
Absolutely agree with this; the trouble, though, is convincing them that they need to go get it checked out!
My dad snores just as bad and while he was in the hospital recently for a bad bout of pneumonia and hooked up to oxygen 24/7 we noticed that he didn't snore hardly at all. Talked to his family doc, took him for a sleep study, and it was sleep apnea all along. I actually just did a deposition of one of the leading sleep apnea physicians in the country, and it's scary how dangerous sleep apnea can be!
I have sleep apnea and have used a cpap machine for year now. With out it apparently I snore horribly.
One thing that the OP might be able to do is to get a recording of his storing. This might go a long way in convincing him that he's got a problem. And get him to read materal about sleep apnea on the internet.
He usually doesn't snore like this, not this loud.
He barely ever used to snore. Then he went to a dr for his sinus pain and he told him to stop taking so much sudafed. So then he started snoring more. Then his dentist said his pain is from clenching his jaw so she gave him a muscle relaxant to take at night. He didn't snore at all while he took that. He ran out and won't get it refilled. He gets headaches almost every day. He has an appt with a neurologist on Wednesday.
I am so not happy with him. Get a clue. I might go stsy at a hotel tomorrow night. Someone else is making noises too. I think his dad is talking in his sleep. Really loudly, Posted via Mobile Device
My H never snored the first 18 years of our marriage, over the last couple of years, his snoring is bombastic. He does have sleep apnea but refuses to go the sleep clinic and get on a machine.
So last year, I sold some jewelry (we are both out of work at this time) and bought a queen sized bed (clearance model) and moved into the spare room. I am in heaven. But it is also a bad thing. Not being able to sleep with my husband has hurt our intimacy, made into room mates instead of a married couple.
So snoring is not just a little problem, it can cause tons of problems that neither spouse see coming. He is not snoring on purpose and it seems awful to get angry at THEM for something they cannot control. But that doesn't make it any easier.'
I have seen those sleep masks for people with sleep apnea, and I must say that they look like the most uncomfortable things!!! Hopefully someday I will be able to sleep with my husband, for now, I sleep with my dog.
I'm not mad that he snores. I'm mad that he knew I has to be up at 6 and he refused to go downstairs and so I had to sleep on the couch. I got maybe 5 hours of sleep, my back hurts. I have my period really bad and had to trek back upstairs in the middle of the night to deal with it. I just don't know what he is thinking. Posted via Mobile Device
Sorry you got a rotten night's sleep. I hate when that happens.
Have you tried to defuse the frustration by talking with your spouse about setting up a sleep 'triage', as in an agreement that whoever has the most need for sleep (such as whoever has to get up early for an appointment, or whoever is legitimately ill) gets to have the bed?
I agree sleeping separately does a number on intimacy, and hopefully he can get some kind of resolution on why he is snoring so loudly. Maybe you will have to take turns as to who gets the bed and who gets the couch, and rotate each night so that both of you get to be sleep-deprived.
An interim option, instead of a crappy couch, is to invest in a blow-up mattress. There are ones available that aren't real expensive.
Ah, the loss of sleep! It makes everything so much worse, doesn't it?
Will you go to the neurologist with him? Can you trust him to bring up the snoring issue with his doctor? Can you get his Rx refilled?
I'd be livid if he had a solution (the pills) and wouldn't use it. But loss of sleep is pretty much the only thing that makes me that emotional, I have to say.
Other temporary solution: make a much better place for you/him to sleep. Sounds like it was an unusal set of circumstances, and you probably should have insisted he move (b/c he didn't have to go to work, right?). Don't blame him if you could have made him move--I don't know your relationship, but I know darn well the tendency I had to give up on h/ex and then blame him. Not useful. Next time be so annoying that he moves, and you get the bed. Let him know it is not acceptable for him to hog the good bed when you are the one who has to go to work early.
But yea, he needs to be seen by his doc for sleep apnea. It is life threatening. Be sure to mention that to him! Not to scare him, but to make him take it seriously.
Did you consider that he meant no malice? You ever been "attacked" in the middle of the night during a deep sleep? It's kind of hard to hold someone accountable for being super polite and rational under those circumstances. And it's not like he cursed you out, he just didn't answer (because he was sleeping) and got cranky. I'd cut the guy a break to be honest. Posted via Mobile Device
No he got mad and yelled "I don't know why I snore so loud!" if his parents hadnt been there I would have kicked his ass put of bed but I didn't want to make a scene and embarrass him.
We have an air mattress. His dad was sleeping on it. I would have gone to lay with my daughter but she snores, grinds her teeth and talks in her sleep.
He apologized and said he wasn't thinking clearly. He is going to ask the doctor about sleep apnea. It might be related to his headaches and tiredness.
He's only 37, geez.
I was already annoyed about other things and having to work on the weekend. It was a bad week and I just wanted to sleep.
I told him I'm sorry but I'm taking a nap when I get home, I know it's antisocial and his parents are here but I'm about to fall asleep at my desk.
I'm not playing mommy/nurse with a man ever again. I told him that before we got married, if he can't take care of his own health it's a deal breaker. I already have one child and two stepsons, I am not going to check up on him and pick up prescriptions and make sure he takes his medicine because he's too stubborn to do it. I spent fourteen years doing that with my ex. Never again!!!!!
I mean yeah if something happens and he wants me to go along or needs help getting the prescription yeah. But I'm not picking it up because he's too lazy or stubborn. Uh uh.
I'm sooooo tired..... Posted via Mobile Device
diwali, I used to "snore" too for a couple years and I got relegated to the spare room so my W (now ex) could sleep. It started around the time I had a really bad flu and strep throat, all congested but the congestion never went away, after a few months went to see doc he said it was inflamed, I had chronic sinusitus, prescribed nasonex I used that and also went on prednisone for a while - the prednisone took the swelling way down was able to breath again, but as soon as I stopped it came back. After a year of that finally asked him to send me to ENT who said right away I have a deviated septum that may have caused the inflamation from improper air flow, went on 18 month waitlist for surgery, during which the ENT also discovered massive nasal polyps that were protuding into the back of my throat. Once I got all this surgically removed I have not "snored" again - I wasn't ever really snoring in the first place I was literally choking, and for that 3+ year ordeal I was going on about 3 hours of broken sleep a night, it took a big toll on everything in my life.
Get your H to see a doc and if doc can't fix to get referral to a well-rated ENT (Ear Nose Throat) specialist.
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Pissed off 
