I haven't read this book yet, but can I assume from the amount of sales that have been generated, that it's Scannerguard's Manifesto to Good Bedroom Fun and a Proper Gender-Defined Relationship validated ?
I have heard from the blog-o-sphere that it is women's suppressed desire for a post-feminist movement unleashed?
I looked back a ways to see if it's been talked about here and I can't find a thread but link me to it, if it's not too old and I am resurrecting a dead topic.
Can you ladies elaborate on why you are so enticed about this book and you are all passing it around?
And maybe I seem a bit confused. . .but maybe, I got you pegged! Ha! Don't know what to do about those tossed salad and scrambled eggs. . .they're posting again. Scannerguard has left the building.
I kept hearing about this book, how it was number 1 on the best seller's list etc. So, I tend to chill out at the book store once a week, and I see the book on display, and others that follow. I pick it and decide to read it.
What a disappointment, I could have read some of that trash on the internet, some erotica for women or whatever. I skimmed through the book, and really, I can't finish it. I just find it way over the top in terms of the sex.
lol and here i was thinking about getting it later on... kept hearing how it's sooo good and such... but now.. i dunno... If all else fails... might give me and hubby some new ideas for the bedroom.. lol. (Yes I tend to read books i have to him before he goes to bed. It's became a sort of ritual...)
It didn't give me any ideas really, I'm not into the s&m.
It's not very realistic really, I mean, she orgasms like I've never seen before, and goes on about how turned on she is etc. I just got fed up hearing the same thing over and over. Him with his condom all the time, we know they're practicing safe sex, leave it at that, we don't have to keep hearing that he put the condom on. And if I heard about her biting her lip one more time...grrrr. Ok, enough of my complaints. I think it's trashy. I used to enjoy Harold Robbins years ago, at least there was more substance to the book.
I've heard mixed reviews, some said it they couldn't put it down, others said the story sucked, it was over the top, if S&M isn't your thing, etc.... haven't read it myself, I like romance/dirty novels but have heard too many mixed reviews.
I got it passed to me as "FrenchFry, this book will be right up your alley." The friend who suggested this book knew that when I was around Anastasia's age (18 or so, 21 for the protagonist) I was involved in a relationship on the surface kinda like this this book delves into. My boyfriend wasn't a billionaire, but he was an Intellectual Dominant Sadist with commitment and intimacy issues. So, I read it and I was like "well, wtf is the hype."
The book is pretty insipid, I don't know if you've gathered this or not but you can absolutely tell it's fanfiction based. But because of how it's written, it's easy to read and get sucked into. For people who don't read much, it's a total beach book and can be finished in a couple sittings. It has no real plot either, it's just sexsexsexsex *emotional pinings* sexsexsexsex.
I think women like it because it hits a few key points that a lot of us fantasize about. Having a rich dude who will pay for everything and allow us to have a completely easy life (for a minimal price.) Being "the one" who fixes a completely broken emotionally stunted man with the power of LOVE (and sex.) Having the power to completely twist a TORTURED ALPHA MALE around our finger with the use of our wit, our street smarts and of course our beauty. Being with a man who is smart, cultured and hot but is also willing to be totally into ****ING the EVERLIVING CRAP out of us. That's the big one, really.
The book is popular though because it's total fantasy though, and a lot of women really crave that domineering, unselfconcious sex that is described in the book. There is a part where Christian (the man) pulls out Ana's tampon and has no issue with it. That kind of stuff is pretty liberating to think about, a man who accepts a woman with all of her bodily processes and wants to have sex with her anyway, and is willing to take the steps to overcome any cultural hesitance imposed on women and essentially free her from them. To be totally sexy and hot without all the baggage is how a submissive lifestyle is portrayed in the book and that's so enticing.
Is it what women are really wanting though? Is it post-feminist?
Post-feminism is kind of vaguely defined, but I'm taking it as you mean a regression to Men as Head Control and women as more submissive and permissive
As a pretty vocal sex positive feminist who argues frequently about BDSM and it's intersection with feminism, as well as someone who has "been there and done that," the book is total 100% fantasy.
In a real life situation, Christian is totally messed up. Emotionally stunted and cold with unresolved issues that are taken out on you gets really old really fast. He's also sadistic to the point that vanilla women would not enjoy, and a little American Psycho-ish. All of the money and all the hot sex in the world doesn't make a emotionally dead relationship good. Real life women get really sick of it realy fast, except the broken ones.
Women (who aren't damaged) aren't like Anastasia past the age of...22 for good measure, most of us wise up way before then. She's naive, immature, desperate and has a personality based mostly on the food she is or isn't eating. She also goes from totally virginal to sex goddess extraordinare in like...3 months. Uh...ok.
Real women may like domineering sex, but they don't like walking on eggshells (constant in the book), they don't like having sex instead of resolving issues (we see that a lot here, actually) and there are elements of serious abuse in the relationship that gives sane BDSMers pause.
What I think women are connecting to isn't the relationship, which is one-dimentional and clearly unhealthy, but the hot sex that is absolutely focused on making sure the woman is the epicenter of pleasure. That happens magically and intimately with no discussion needed, no talking about "what feels good," no awkwardness of "hey we need to talk about how to make this better," nothing routine, no lazy or selfish lovers. It's a freaking romance novel with bondage.
Like I said, I was in a quasi-similar relationship. All the hot sex in the world doesn't help emotional issues. Being in a controlling relationship long term absolutely wrecks you. I can't stress that enough, it's soul destroying. You don't end up sparkling and full of Inner Goddessness and spunk, you end up destroyed and trying to piece together your self-worth. It really sucks, and I think that things like this book and Twilight don't point towards us entering a post-feminist era but an era where women's sexuality is still so wrapped up in mystery, and where we have forgotten what romance really looks like, which isn't control.
Long and rambly, but my point is: women like it because of the hot sex and if they were in a relationship like this book really they'd run screaming for the hills. Nothing post-feminist about that.
I read all three for work believe it or not. The writer wrote it as fan fiction for an adult version of Twilight. If you read that series and then read these books you'll see the similarities.
I found the writing to be really bad and hard to get through just like Twilight actually. The sex kept you captivated for maybe the end of the first book but it went on and on and on and eventually I wanted to kick the crap out of the main character's inner Goddess.
Kudos to the writer though...she had it published small time and then got it picked up in a bidding war and made a fortune.
For me, Alice Hoffman is much more lady pornish than this though and there's not much sex, if at all, in her books. Go figure.