07-03-2012, 12:11 PM
Join Date: Dec 2011
| | Re: I need some Attention
This friend stuff needs to be settled before one gets married. I am glad that my fiancÚ has our show down over his "friend" early on.
For those of us who like to see ourselves as easygoing, live and let live type people, we allow those who have no consideration for other people's boundaries to just walk all over us. I am learning to be a litlle bit more tightly wound when dealing with others.
As for you, Confuzed2012, you have to be ready that he will not be willing to give up this friendship. Once you have accepted that possibility, then let him know that you are looking for a full time partner. If he can't commit to that, then you will be happy to be a "special friend" on par with that of the neighbour.
Remember, do not make ultimatums before you are ready to carry them out. Give some thought as to what you would do if you were to end the relation ship before you have that discussion with him. In the meantime, though, you could make him a little bit nervous, by being less than forthcoming, a bit wistful, not so reliable, let him sweat for a while himself.......