I went through all my pictures and took out any of him and stuck them in a box... maybe someday I'll look at them again, it was a big part of my life so i can't just throw them away, but I really don't want to look at them now.
Yeah if you throw it all out you're throwing out your history...I can't throw mine out, besides mine are all on the comp for the most part. I'll put everything in one box prob when I move that way I don't have to see it all. I have one pic I keep on my night stand...my stbx are still friends (or so I'm told) and we'll be in each other's lives regardless (at least that's what I think now, can't predict tomorrow or 6 months from now) but anyway. I still have some that need to come off the walls though...
Good ideas, I'll just stick them in a box for the girls.
I did mention that the last two girls were born at home?
Did I?
The littlest one was born in the basement in a large bathtub and the older one was born upstairs on lots of plastic and towels.
Quite an experience.
We have video of the events. I am conflicted on what to do with these videos.
I'll probably give them to her. We use to watch them together every year on their birthday.
Thats past now.
I wish I could just go home and not see any of her stuff or her for that matter, but mostly I wish she was just stop calling me. She has nothing to say I want to hear anymore.
I'm good folks
I'm Ok
The oldest is taking me out for father's day tonight. Italian, good eats at Carrabas.
It was so very nice yesterday, the girls took me out for dinner , delayed father's day.
We went shopping.
I got home.
I went downstairs to watch Internet TV, then my eldest daughter had to have drama.
Her ex-boyfriend was drinking and became an emotional mess that poured onto my front porch.
Then my soon to be ex-wife had to come down and tell me about it.
I did not look at her, I stared strait ahead the entire time. She was behind me. After the described drama, I asked her how her apartment hunting was going.
She's irritated? So what. Don't let that get to you.
This is about you getting better now. If you need her to go then she needs to get to gettin.
Hope your day gets better, remember your kiddos, they're always one reason to smile through the tunnels of hell. Mine keeps me going when I'm hanging on that thin unraveling thread.
__________________ "Cause I'll be there, in the back of your mind, from the day we met to the very last night, and it's just too bad, you've already had the best days, the best days of your life..."
Hi there, I've been away as my mother was visiting from Florida.
Yes, your stbx really needs to go. Must have felt good when she got annoyed at you asking about her apartment hunting. I still don't understand why you're in the basement. Maybe it's where you want to be right now because it's far away from her in a sense.
Apartment hunting can't be that difficult unless you don't have the money to move. That would be the only thing holding her back don't you think? Ask her if that's the problem and then maybe you could help her just to get her out? Then you could truly move on and get your life up and running again. Just a thought.
p.s. you're doing great!
OITC I must say you've made massive strides since the beginning of this thread. I'm glad to see you're looking out for yourself and staying healthy and safe.
__________________ "Cause I'll be there, in the back of your mind, from the day we met to the very last night, and it's just too bad, you've already had the best days, the best days of your life..."
Same thing when I took up golf a few years ago, almost everymale in my office played, I never played, looked too boring.
Some guys at the office invited me to give it a try as a sub on the company golf league.
Well after about a month and three(3) sets of golf clubs later, I was playing everyday almost or practicing, purchased a $250 driver and a $300 dollar putter not to mention my specialty clubs in between.
I got myself down to a 39 on nine holes within six months of beginning golf. Then I hit a wall, I couldn't get any better. I hovered in the low 40s. Then I quit cold turkey.
I'm hoping my improvements can transcend my obsessive nature. I want true change in who I am.
My soon to be ex-wife asked my daughter the other day, "What do you admire most about your father?", I was sitting in between them, she did not hesitate, she said,"his morals" I am steadfastly black and white on right and wrong. My favorite saying, "Nothing Good Comes From Ill Gotten Gain".
Not the feature in my character I want to change.
I will continue on the path all of you have helped me shape. My obsession for a better me will not end one day but will continue the rest of my life.
That is the future I visualize for myself.
When I make my movie and it is debut night, I will fly each one of you to the premiere weekend and have one hell of a party.
I love you all and look forward to meeting you one day.
I'm wondering why she asked your daughter . . . "What do you admire most about your father?" Was it on Father's Day? anyway, opening night should be a blast =] I can't wait.
__________________ "Cause I'll be there, in the back of your mind, from the day we met to the very last night, and it's just too bad, you've already had the best days, the best days of your life..."
5Likes
Re: It hurts sooooo bad right now ... 
Maybe it's where you want to be right now because it's far away from her in a sense. 
