We are going to do it online. I'm getting together the funds to pay her bills and the agreement for monthly alimony.
She is going to move out in a few weeks, nothing available right now.
She still wanted to move upstairs, but I asked her to do this with an open mind. No commitments, no promises toward our marriage. She just was not to mention divorce and to keep an open mind while she lived under my roof.
She said no, but prefaced it with "You are a really good man, good looking, no father better than you" but still said, "No".
So I did the only thing I could.
I asked her to move out and get on with living the divorce she wants.
You can't cut off your arm one finger at a time. You can't divorce someone over three(3) years in the same house and ask your husband to please move on and stop loving you.
I'm not a super-emotional-man able to forget love in a single bound.
I think I will be ok, but it will take about 5 years to recover from this money hit.
I told her she can come over to the house any time she wants, stay as long as she wants, do laundry, just not while I am there.
The girls and I will be Ok, I'm pretty sure.
I wish I had a happy ending for this, but we are not in the movies.
No invented situation to rescue us, no emotional moment where we look into each other's eyes and see something.
I'm not even sad at this moment, but I know I will be down the line.
We're all here for a reason, often a painful one. Only someone who is/has experienced that knows what advice to give. That's why we're here for each other.
Lots of pain (almost made me leave last year!) but lots of good advice, too (that's why I stayed).
Today's my BD! Come on over Friday...the kids are bringing a cake! And probably balloons, too --- oh, shoot...I have vaulted ceilings!!
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It ain't illegal until you're caught!
yes I believe you made the right decision to ask her to move out. You did not force her to choose. she made the choice in the first place to get divorced. You didn't force anything. I believe you've done the right thing. Can I ask you a question? You don't have to answer but....why will you be paying her alimony? won't support for the girls be enough? I'm not familiar with the laws of your state but alimony is outdated now isn't it? Unless the break-up was your fault, I don't believe she'll be qualifying for alimony.
At first, it was just banter about our 3rd child's upcoming 13th birthday.
Then on the 4th phone call, she was sobbing, apparently she was attempting to pack her stuff or go through it.
She says, "I don't know where to start" crying (a lot of stuff after 24 years)
Now she wants to talk.
My office wife (I confide in her a lot, she's 10 years older and wiser) says, "don't help her to leave, she has to realize what she is giving up and she also thinks my wife is having a mid-life crisis".
I would have to agree somewhat.
We were suppose to talk last night, but she worked from morning until night. She went to bed early.
She is a manager at our local athletic facility. It is the nicest one in the area, too bad I have terrible feelings about the place now.
We are suppose to talk this morning.
I'm up early as you can tell, I'll let everyone know.
Re: It hurts sooooo bad right now ...
And probably balloons, too --- oh, shoot...I have vaulted ceilings!!
