advice needed girls!!!

gizzmo16 · 02-08-2008, 07:27 AM

hi, i have been with my partner for 7 years, we have had a bad few months and he started seeing another girl. we split for january and contiunued to try and work thins out. last thursday we decided to make a go of it, and i told him to he had to finish with this girl. he said he has, however, i think he saw her saturday and again yesterday and stayed at a hotel. im throught the hurt, pain and anger - do i tell him to go??? any advice welcome thanks

kapjet · 02-08-2008, 07:14 PM

You said you think he saw this girl again? Do you have proof? Have you asked him ? Make sure you have all the facts before jumping to conclusions.
However if he did see her and it wasnt to break it off for good, then I think I would cut ties with him as you deserve better! It will be hard to trust him again.
Are you married to him? Any kids?
All the best to you!

ronnieswifey1120 · 02-09-2008, 01:28 AM

I think you need to give your boyfriend an ultimatum. He needs to choose which woman he wants to be with. It seems like he wants to have his cake and eat it too. It isn't fair of him to be getting the best of both worlds. If he keeps going back and forth, it's because both you and the other woman allow him to. If you cut off his resources to you, so to speak, he will realize that you won't stand to be used and put through this ordeal. If there is a chance that it will work out, then try. But if you've done everything in your power to make it work and he hasn't put in an equal and fair effort, cut him loose!

Good luck!!! I wish you the best.

mollyL · 02-10-2008, 01:51 PM

I read what you wrote; I didn't once see the word "love". I think you might want to think about that if you are so unsure what you need to do. Does he love you, do you love him? You've been together for seven years, you should know how you and how your boyfriend feels. I think you need a frank discussion on this; you should have a better idea of what you should do after you talk.

lisakifttherapy · 02-10-2008, 11:51 PM

He needs to figure out what he wants. And you need to figure out how much you're willing to tolerate. A good sit-down together to figure out what you both really want sounds like a good idea at this point. Good communication between couples is like water to a plant. Good luck!

alm74 · 02-18-2008, 11:05 AM

If you are not married and don't have any kids, then I think you should just cut the ties and move on. I know it is easy for me to sit back and say that because I'm sure that it would be very difficult for you to do, but how could you ever trust him again? It's something you need to decide...if you think you could trust him again, then maybe there is a chance. I just don't think that anyone can trust someone again 100% after someone has lost their trust.