I feel the "want" to cheat.

nikkilaya1234 · 03-09-2008, 10:06 PM

I love love love my boyfriend. We're totally exclusive and have been together for a year and a half now. But I don't get turned on anymore by him. It's not him. He's extremely attractive in every way. I'm very lucky to have him. But I feel like I want something else for a little bit. I even try to imagine someone else while we're "getting it on" or just until I get turned on enough. I feel like if we were ever to get married, I wouldn't be able to be faithful. What should I do? How could I talk to him about this without hurting his feelings?

Immortalone · 03-10-2008, 07:03 AM

You need to talk to him asap! I can't think of a time when I heard a person say I want to date other people for a bit and then things work out. Something is wrong here. I know you say how good looking he is but there is more to being attractive to a person then there appearence.

Some how he is not meeting your needs. Perhaps you simply need more cuddling from the start. Maybe you need to feel emotionly loved and not just lust. There are alot of things you need to look at together and work it out together.

mollyL · 03-11-2008, 09:33 AM

You say you are "lucky" to have him. You say he is attractive; why else are you lucky to have him?
You have been together for a year or so and you are already wanting to cheat? This is not a good thing. You need to get your head on straight pretty quickly or tell him. You are not being fair to him in any way. This isn't what being "in love" is like at all.
You are not being fair to him at all; you are not even treating him the way you would treat "a friend".
Is wealth or the expectation of a comfortable lifestyle in the future one of the reasons you are "lucky" to have him?

True Blue · 03-11-2008, 11:51 AM

Perhaps your relationship has run it's course and it's time to move on. Before you cheat you should tell him you need some time apart to re-evaluate your relationship. He'll be hurt (maybe not) but honesty is always best. Right now you think the grass is greener on the other side, and you may find it is or you may realize that you already had what you needed. Whichever conclusion you reach just remember that your boyfriend deserves the truth and not a cheater.

draconis · 03-11-2008, 08:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by nikkilaya1234

I love love love my boyfriend. We're totally exclusive and have been together for a year and a half now. But I don't get turned on anymore by him. It's not him. He's extremely attractive in every way. I'm very lucky to have him. But I feel like I want something else for a little bit. I even try to imagine someone else while we're "getting it on" or just until I get turned on enough. I feel like if we were ever to get married, I wouldn't be able to be faithful. What should I do? How could I talk to him about this without hurting his feelings?

How old are you and how old is he?

draconis

berlinlife06 · 03-16-2008, 10:05 AM

Well, depending on your age, a year and a half is nothing or is to much. I see that you
"love, love, love" him, but maybe you are not in love with him anymore, and that's why he doesn't turn you on. Talk to him. And before cheati ng on him, break it up for a while... who knows, maybe he is the man of your dreams, but not at theis moment.

Chopblock · 05-01-2008, 09:22 AM

Stinks for him doesn't it. He thinks he is with someone who loves him and all the while you are not attracted to him. Of course you won't clue him in because "you love love love" him and if he did know he'd probably stop doing all the things you enjoy.

I say just go ahead and break up with him. You both deserve better.