Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: State of Unwedded Bliss
Re: My kids and the affair partner...
No, you're certainly not alone, OP. I'm dealing with this, too. Many of us here are. Sometimes it just kills me, sometimes it makes me angry, most of the time I just let myself go numb. I've realized that my son is too young to understand the nuances of fidelity and marriage and such. I am grateful that, for the most part, the Trampire treats him well. I have certainly heard of cases where the life of a child in this situation is a nightmare. I'm grateful he's not dealing with that.
That leaves the only heartache being mine. I don't want anger or bitterness or sadness coming between me and DS, so I have to suck it up. I try to draw boundaries where I'm the mom and she's not, but there are also times when I just have to listen when he tells me about cool things they do together or special inside jokes they have.
I figure that someday, I'll be sharing him with a future relationship partner, too, so this is just practice for letting him go then, too. We just have to make sure we're there for us when they need us, because they only have one mom.