I see what you're saying scannerguard, they want "safe" after having their bad boy.
This holds some truth.
After marrying a "bad boy" I will be running in the other direction when I'm ready to date again.
Not that I'll be looking for a nice guy to raise a kid, I don't have any.
Just someone stable with a functional brain would be nice.
Has anyone here tried E-Harmony, Match, or some of the other sites? If so, how did it work for you? Would you recommend it?
I used PoF.com and OKCupid.com (both free) over eight months. Met interesting and interested women on both, am now extremely happy with a woman I met on the latter. We were on-line at the same time, she rated me a 5, I did the same and contacted her using OKCupid's messaging system, we met a few days later and found we really liked each other. Four days after that meeting we had our second date and found we were soul mates, male and female spirits with incredibly similar minds and bodies that match perfectly. Being more than a bit of an introvert with no local friends meant on-line dating was the only reasonable approach for me.
We quickly switched from OKCupid's messaging to our email address and flirted a great deal. Neither of us likes cell phones so we didn't use them at all - the delays really get in the way of communications.
A fair number of the women I've dated had a difficult time finding suitable dates, then again if they had found compatible men they wouldn't be dating. YMMV. The wonderful woman I'm with now talks about dates that were awful beyond words during the 18 months prior to meeting me.
Several months ago, I tried Pof, eHarmony, Match.com and a couple of other sites. I had the best luck with Match, even though I didn't meet anyone I was interested in for a long term relationship.
I recently signed up for Match and eHarmony again, to give them a second try...maybe better luck this time? I also joined Are You Interested on Facebook.
If I understand E-harmony, though, they automatically show the people I matched with according to my answers. The fact that I only matched 2 in a 60 mile radius must mean I am unusual. It did give me tips on how to increase my matches. Some questions had a scale of "Not important" to "very important" on things like smoking. It suggested that if I ease up on the importance of some of those things, I would probably get more matches.
The problem is, if you ease up on what is important to you then you are NOT going to find what you're really looking for.
All it takes is ONE and if you can only get two matches but they match your requirements, then there's a possibility of something really working out.
I once told a buddy that if there's something you don't like about your women friends, then be wary of it because if you do end up with them, your dislike of whatever it is will increase ten fold.
So stay with your requirements and hope for the best.
Depends on what you want. In my mid 40s I'm done having kids, almost done raising them and am looking forward to being free and unencumbered. I don't want ANY ties whatsoever.
Now when I was 29 I was planning on having a family.. and was pregnant at 31 and 35. So the question is? Does this 29 year old woman want to settle down and have a family in the next decade?? Are you going to be wanting go have babies in your mid to late 40s?
Now for ME, a 29 year old guy would be great because I need someone that age who can keep up with me and we'd have the same taste in music.
__________________ D DAY: Monday, April 1, 2013 And now it's your chance to move on
Change the way you've lived for so long
And find the strength you've had inside all along
'Cause life starts now
Online dating doesn't appeal to me in the least. It does seem to work for others though. I just don't like the entire concept.
Amazing how alike we are..I feel the same way. Too much uncertainty. I'm not interested in dating but I'd want to meet people through friends, mutual interests, hobbies. It's just the way I roll. For others, it may work out fine. More power to them. IMO, online dating is a great option for some so why not use it?
Years ago, after I broke up with my first boyfriend/fiancee I was lonely and looking and went with a dating service (before the term "online" was a reality) and it went pretty badly and eventually I canceled it. Then I hooked up with my H, who was an old friend. Thought it was a sure bet. Guess not.
So nothing is certain. What I do know is that I am not in the least lonely or bored and don't have any burning desire to meet anyone.
__________________ D DAY: Monday, April 1, 2013 And now it's your chance to move on
Change the way you've lived for so long
And find the strength you've had inside all along
'Cause life starts now
Last edited by Freak On a Leash; 10-26-2011 at 09:10 PM.
Yeah, 25 years ago I played the "Break Up and Run Out looking for Someone Else" game and have been paying for it ever since. I guess the only good thing is that the result of it all is two great kids so it wasn't a total loss.
Now? I just want peace and fun. No hassles. NO commitments.
__________________ D DAY: Monday, April 1, 2013 And now it's your chance to move on
Change the way you've lived for so long
And find the strength you've had inside all along
'Cause life starts now
__________________ D DAY: Monday, April 1, 2013 And now it's your chance to move on
Change the way you've lived for so long
And find the strength you've had inside all along
'Cause life starts now
I used the plenty of fish and the okcupid sites. okcupid I really didn't like and deleted it within a week of putting it up. POF I do like and I had it up for about 3 months and have recently deleted that too. I deleted it because I wanted to take a break. Maybe someday I'll do another one but not right now. However, I did meet a guy from pof that I am now talking with. I haven't met him in person yet though and I'm not sure sure how to read into that. When we talk, we can talk for hours and we do talk for hours. We have phone conversations that last from like 2 to 4 hours. I do wish I could meet him and see if we have the same chemistry in real life as we do online.
I'm not having much luck with the online dating sites. I like to call plenty of fish, "plenty of freaks". lol! I get so many creeper e-mails that it just turns me off from the site completely. I did start e-mailing one guy from there for a couple of days, and then he completely flipped out on me when I didn't get back to him right away. Hello, red flag! We hadn't even met yet! I get lots of "I love you" and "will you marry me" type e-mails. I can't take it seriously now. Match.com seems to have more genuine people who seem to take things more seriously. I went on a date with a guy who I thought looked cute in his profile picture, and I was so disappointed when I met him. He did not look like his picture. I really prefer to meet someone in person and flirt with him and see if there is a mutual attraction. Then I can tell if I want to take a chance and go out with him. IDK...I'm getting discouraged!
Re: Pros and Cons of On-line dating 
Too much uncertainty. I'm not interested in dating but I'd want to meet people through friends, mutual interests, hobbies. It's just the way I roll. For others, it may work out fine. More power to them. IMO, online dating is a great option for some so why not use it? 
Rushing? Heck, I'm running in the opposite direction!
