Arrival - Talk About Marriage
Life After Divorce Divorce is complicated, and change is never easy to cope with. Use this section for help and advice on living life after a divorce.

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post #1 of 16 (permalink) Old 10-14-2015, 08:23 PM Thread Starter
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Arrival

On the 26th October, I will be posting on here properly. It is a long time coming and I look forward to it.

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post #2 of 16 (permalink) Old 10-14-2015, 08:27 PM
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Re: Arrival

I can hardly wait, should I get mr Orville redenbocker ready?
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post #3 of 16 (permalink) Old 10-14-2015, 09:34 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Arrival

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I can hardly wait, should I get mr Orville redenbocker ready?
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You know, perhaps so.
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post #4 of 16 (permalink) Old 10-15-2015, 10:01 AM
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post #5 of 16 (permalink) Old 10-15-2015, 10:09 AM
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Re: Arrival

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Why that particular day?
Given the name of this particular forum ("Life After Divorce"), I'd be willing to bet that's the day that his divorce will be final.

Virginia: "Why can't you kids leave well enough alone? Everything was fine until you started digging around."

Burt: "You sound like a Scooby Doo villain."
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post #6 of 16 (permalink) Old 10-15-2015, 08:51 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Arrival

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Given the name of this particular forum ("Life After Divorce"), I'd be willing to bet that's the day that his divorce will be final.
Yes.
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post #7 of 16 (permalink) Old 10-30-2015, 11:40 AM Thread Starter
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Re: Arrival

All done. $45K, to be paid to her lawyer by the end of the month. That is fine and all in all a bargain. Very different to how it would be in the UK or even USA, but Denmark is very much into equality.

In hindsight, I see that when she got married she was very attached to the new life she saw ahead, which was rather an NPR-idyll. As soon as anything threatened that, she was scared. So, not being able to get a glamorous job was a threat and she would not accept a basic one. Being independent seemed too much like hard work and a threat. Being a non-working person doing housework seemed like a threat, so she would not do that. She stayed in and felt down, her libido fell and she would not accept having to make any effort there.

When trouble strikes and fear creeps in, there are a few ways of reacting: get out of the area, tackle the problem or hide under the quilt and play Candy Crush. She chose the third. It was not malice, but fear and there was nothing I believe I could do about it (before I am condemned for that statement, I have had her best friend in Denmark and the marriage counselor opine that I could not have done more - God bless equality). What I have learned is to not take it personally, as that is the last thing that is needed, that important lesson of emotional independence. @CopperTop

Last edited by Mr The Other; 11-01-2015 at 01:34 PM.
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post #8 of 16 (permalink) Old 03-20-2016, 10:43 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Arrival

And I am on the verge of entering a new settled relationship. "Settled" may be a little strong, as I am likely heading back to Europe at the end of the year. It does take time to remember that relationships really can be great. It is good to reflect that I am far richer, happier and physically healthier than I was when I last posted on this thread.
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post #9 of 16 (permalink) Old 03-23-2016, 12:11 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Arrival

Another reflection, I was expecting divorce day to be a great relief. It was not. This is apparently not unusual, but I then spent a few months feeling down before coming around.
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post #10 of 16 (permalink) Old 04-24-2016, 10:16 AM Thread Starter
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Re: Arrival

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And I am on the verge of entering a new settled relationship. "Settled" may be a little strong, as I am likely heading back to Europe at the end of the year. It does take time to remember that relationships really can be great. It is good to reflect that I am far richer, happier and physically healthier than I was when I last posted on this thread.
Well, that did not work. She was not really that into it she confessed, so I moved on.

I have taken up with a young college girl, for which I expect fewer 'Likes'.

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post #11 of 16 (permalink) Old 04-24-2016, 12:27 PM
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post #12 of 16 (permalink) Old 04-24-2016, 12:57 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Arrival

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How old are you?
30's
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post #13 of 16 (permalink) Old 04-24-2016, 01:38 PM
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Re: Arrival

Cool. Just wanted to know how you can attract the college girls.

She is young. Don't use her.
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post #14 of 16 (permalink) Old 04-24-2016, 03:20 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Arrival

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Cool. Just wanted to know how you can attract the college girls.

She is young. Don't use her.
She warned me not to fall in love! But, yes, of course.

I genuinely get on well with younger people on the whole, certainly for intelligent conversation and generally been more attrative to younger women than I can explain. There was a joke that women outgrew me once they were in the thirties, which may have meant getting engaged to a 29 year old was asking for trouble in hindsight!
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post #15 of 16 (permalink) Old 01-03-2017, 03:05 PM
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Re: Arrival

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She warned me not to fall in love! But, yes, of course.



I genuinely get on well with younger people on the whole, certainly for intelligent conversation and generally been more attrative to younger women than I can explain. There was a joke that women outgrew me once they were in the thirties, which may have meant getting engaged to a 29 year old was asking for trouble in hindsight!


Intelligent conversation w a 20 year old? And your way older? You'll get old and tired and she'll leave you. I'm sorry to say.
All the best


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