Crossroads III: The Launch - Page 2 - Talk About Marriage
Life After Divorce Divorce is complicated, and change is never easy to cope with. Use this section for help and advice on living life after a divorce.

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post #16 of 76 (permalink) Old 08-07-2016, 04:24 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Crossroads III: The Launch

Before I go into detail with new gal..... I would like to update things with "Cyclone Mom." When mom went to driving school last year (LOL) she was informed if she has one more accident which is seen as her fault, her DL will be pulled for five years. She was ultra pizzed.... I didn't exactly agree with it either but if you weigh in car insurance and her age (over 70), I can see why. Anyway... she began coming out a few times a week and we got along great. I enjoyed it.... but knew.... I still called and asked her if she needs anything ONLY if I am in town for other reasons. I called her on a Sunday, needs nothing. Run into town.... by the time we return.... VM..... day before the 4th.... in a wreck, no injuries, her fault.

Now she realizes the fact she will not be allowed to drive. She leans on me..... hints.... yeah I know where this goes. But y'know ..... if any female deserves one last chance, it is her. Yes I already contemplated the part that could be bad. Since her DL was to be pulled and she told off her sister, she could be stuck at her apartment for days at a time. No smokes, no food.... yeah still bothered me.... she would sit there with no food for three days until you asked how she was just to guilt trip you. Did she me, no but I just know how she works. He!! she was with pop 30 damn years and he was a master manipulator.

I was given a premonition.... while I was moving her to my place. D72 (mom) was pulling up a rose bush she wanted to plant at my place, fell backwards, cracked her head on the walkway. Blood poured. I was inside her place boxing stuff up, saw a bunch of older women outside, went to investigate. Mom was on the ground, crying.... I asked who called 911, confusion, I pointed at one "call 911 NOW" they looked at me like I was a Commie from 1953. Her neighbor, one with common sense came over, had her hold her head up while I called 911. Three hours in ER with her, cranky as he!! because she wanted Taco Bell. Decided to be Bonnie Bad A$$ and jerk the needle out of her arm while waiting to be dismissed. Then was shocked blood poured from her arm.... ya think! Yes.... SHE raised me.... shocks me too.

I knew she needed to be in a nursing home but also was aware she would not go willingly. Mom knows they take your entire check minus maybe $30. Can't smoke in them, her precious Cokes are $6 per 12pack there in their "store," a 100% mark-up. Okay.... you can't drive anymore, let's try it. For the first few weeks she was bringing stuff out to move in.... golden. Worked in the yard (that was her passion) in 100 degree heat..... "Mom... come inside, you aren't young anymore." I begged her to go to bed early, wake early, work in yard early.... not too hot. Can't do it.... she will miss her cooking / food channel. Nothing like chain smoking and watching others cook schit until 3AM. Reminded me of my college days when I would smoke weed with friends and watch the infomercial about waxing your car.

Fast forward to end of July. I am leaving a lot out and may touch on at a later date.... I noticed her bytching and cussing began to emerge again. I addressed it immediately. Won't happen under my roof.... you mad, you deal with it. My birthday came.... I didn't think mom would be around to see my 44th. She didn't mention anything...... no harm, other things on her mind. End of the day, new gal informed me I'm being taken out for my B-day. As we are leaving.... "anything you care to say mom," nada. Never forgot my birthday.... didn't want anything from her, just a Gdamn Happy Birthday.... didn't happen. We returned around midnight, came in.... "Where in the fvck have you two been" Not cool.... almost addressed it then and there, waited. Embarrassed... yeah.

I will compact these few actions.....Mom was changing clothes in the AM in my card room.... fell, knocked over a desk of cards. Yeah Chuck... they're only cards.... well I make sets from single cards, sell them for extra $$, if you know what you are doing, you can make a pretty good living doing that alone. Then D72 schit, yes schit, in the floor as she was going to bathroom. The guest bathroom always had a water drip trail to the toilet.... yes birthing fat a$$ babies does that. But I do expect the water droplets to be cleaned up. Oh... and the schit in the hallway to as well. "I'm going into town, I will clean it when I return." DL pulled and still driving.... YAY. Next day.... "I ain't cleaning that up you are." Two days it sat there with towels upon it.... I was NOT cleaning up her Gdamn schit. I baited her into finally cleaning it.

Later that night, D72 became frustrated with..... WTFE and began yelling and cussing at me. I left and retired to my room. D72 proceeded to bang, kick on my door, yell how much of a sorry no good MF I was. She broke the lock..... I had the phone in my room, almost called. I slept that night with my feet against the door.... yes I am living with my MOTHER. She did say..... If abortions were legal when I was carrying you, I would have had one." Hurt? You bet your a$$ it did. No fvcking more.

Next night, same schit. I told her she needed to stop moving in and find another place to live. "You ain't had a Gdamn real job in ten years." I guess I pimp myself out to lonely women for money huh.... I guess a grad degree was nothing to her, actually she said I would never make it through grad school. Teaching in public schools were nothing, going after my PhD was nothing, but she always accepted my cash when it bought her something. It's funny, I began viewing her as a STBXW.

Called the police the next night..... long story short.... after mom admitted to her actions the night before.......they said "work it out." The po-po told me to stop being sarcastic...... let's just say my response somehow didn't land me in jail. See.... if I had beaten down the door with mom, they would have put me under the jail.... but her.... dat yo mawma, jist deel wif it. Sorry...... but he!!s no Bubba.

Mom has moved out.... had relatives, same ones who helped her move in..... move out.... two weeks later. God knows we are headlines on the family gossip mobile. WTFE

I never knew how much of a sorry no-good Gdamn MF I was....... until mom was moving in and told me so!!!!! Wow!!! I finished undergrad six weeks after pop died. Mom asked me to stick around awhile..... I did because I cared the world for her. Year in.... I met WC.... I stayed with her often to get away from mom's outbursts..... you do the math.

Sad ending no matter how you look at it. I gave 110% in helping her the last year. But it's over. I left everything on the field. No regrets.... As with pop, I want to remember her for what she was, not what she turned into. I just can't be around her any more. If she passes without us talking again.... guess that's my cross to bear. We ALL have crosses to bear.

44, no kids, job prospects drying up like a fart in the wind, no family left. Not the way I wanted to envision things.... 25 years ago. Always thought if I never married, no kids.... by now I would be a beach bum, jamming to Jimmy Buffet, sleeping in a hammock by day, writing novels by night. Try to remind myself.... could be worse.... three kids, divorced, XW took everything, turned kids against me, living in a "by the week" suite on the shady side of town. Making $2k a week.... paying out $1.5k a week.

I feel so much like Mike Thomas.... sitting on the deck that night wondering WTF his life went. Think I posted that part back in 2015.


A-Every single thing that has ever happened in your life is preparing you for a moment that is yet to come.
B-We know what we are, but know not what we may be
C-Never make the person in your present pay for the sins committed by people from your past
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post #17 of 76 (permalink) Old 08-07-2016, 05:29 PM
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Re: Crossroads III: The Launch

Jesus Chuck you need a change of scenery

Would't you say ?

55

Endeavor to persevere for your love and happiness

Give up on yourself and others will follow
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post #18 of 76 (permalink) Old 08-07-2016, 10:44 PM
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Re: Crossroads III: The Launch

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Originally Posted by just got it 55 View Post
Jesus Chuck you need a change of scenery

Would't you say ?

55
This.

BTW, I will be in your neck of the woods in 8 days, Chuck.

Let me know if you are up for a cold one.

"Our ability to feel joy is directly related to how much pain we are willing to feel." - Mavash.

"The truth is, everyone is going to hurt you. You just got to find the ones worth suffering for." - Bob Marley
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post #19 of 76 (permalink) Old 08-08-2016, 01:11 AM
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Re: Crossroads III: The Launch

Unfortunately we don't get to choose our parents. Your mother does not deserve a son like you Chuck.

Hugs.
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post #20 of 76 (permalink) Old 08-08-2016, 05:48 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Crossroads III: The Launch

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Jesus Chuck you need a change of scenery

Would't you say ?

55
I did get the change..... her arse is out the door. Unless it is with a police escort, she will never step foot in my place again. Whoever she is staying with or if she got her own place.... she's their problem now. They will find out soon enough.... why Chuck cut ties with her. It reminds me of a 40 year M that was pretty good for the most part but in the end, it completely turned to schit.

She told me about 20 years ago, she had a dream I was mad at her, wouldn't come around her, and she spent her last days in a rocking chair reading the Bible and hoping I would come see her. Now that was a fvcking premonition....

A-Every single thing that has ever happened in your life is preparing you for a moment that is yet to come.
B-We know what we are, but know not what we may be
C-Never make the person in your present pay for the sins committed by people from your past
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post #21 of 76 (permalink) Old 08-08-2016, 05:49 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Crossroads III: The Launch

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Unfortunately we don't get to choose our parents. Your mother does not deserve a son like you Chuck.

Hugs.
Thank you. Hugs

A-Every single thing that has ever happened in your life is preparing you for a moment that is yet to come.
B-We know what we are, but know not what we may be
C-Never make the person in your present pay for the sins committed by people from your past
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post #22 of 76 (permalink) Old 08-26-2016, 04:52 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Crossroads III: The Launch

At the university the seniors are required to take a senior seminar for graduation. Tenured professors rarely handle these, they're during the day.... cuts into their golf game. Anyhows.... we untenured or not yet piled high n deeps (PhD) have the pleasure of doing them. In a perfect world.... all of these students at this Christian university would graduate and work until retirement at a job where everyone is a devout Christian. Sadly.... the parents who send their kids here.... actually think that. So me and a handful of others get to come in and... shatter their sweet and innocent view of the world. I enjoyed leading so many to a door and entice them just enough as to where they open the door. At the end of each semester, me and the guys (two females) who teach these... take a weekend trip and share what we observed. Boggling your mind is a gross understatement.

Most of the students are not 100% naive to the world but some are. The wildest ones are the guys with unlimited funds... followed close by preacher's daughters. From Maryland / Pennsylvania north... it's a culture shock here. They think we's talk funny... we laugh they don't know what cornbread is. I missed plenty of lectures back in Fall 2015 due to taking care of mom. I explained to them why I was out several times. Several would ask about her after class or in the hallway with genuine concern. One was a 23 y / o business major. She was sweet and showed concern... She graduated in December. I still guest lecture but after missing so many days, we decided I take a "LoA" and my doctoral studies ceased as well. Maybe in the future.... but I still lecture but not "actively." This female stopped by to see me early this year and my "little office in the very back beside the hot water heater" was filled with boxes of papers.

Long story short... she left her # and the secretary contacted me. We talked a few times... I wished her well on her new intern job (taking graduate courses) and mentioned a few contacts and "people you should know." Few weeks pass by and we run into each other at the market. "I was hoping you would call me sometime...... We should get together, do something." She was very blunt in the way she said those. She is no longer a student at the university, her grad studies are at a nearby uni......

We go out a few times, have a really nice time. Her people are from a prominent city about three hours away. After grad school she said she would return to the city if no lucrative job offers became available here. Whaddayaknow... 2x a week led to 3x... she would say -care if I run by, I'm in the neighborhood- I knew then... being I live in the country... I have mountains visible from my living room. In the neighborhood my a$$ LOL. Well next thing you know... she would purposefully drink too much to "have to stay over" or would constantly want me to drink just enough... I would have to stay at her place. Yeah.... but Chuck how did you know it was a ploy? After we were "official" she cut back the drinking at my place 80% and wasn't trying to shove drinks in my face at her place.

We've done the parent deal... I was lucky, she met mom on one of her good days back in the spring. I would not have her meet mom if mom was in one of those moods. I did tell her what she saw was not what she was for the first 40 years I knew her. I met her parents.... yeah her dad was third degreeing me. He is in the finance field. He gave his mini bio, what he's done. I asked him what he thought about Ray Blanton and the fiasco he caused back in the 70s, a few bank panics in history, de-regulation during Reagan's term. He asked me to go fishing with him before we left.... yeah good sign. Course he and I were somewhat close in age.

We visited her grandparent's farm.... around 75 acres. Gramps was mighty impressed I could milk a cow.... MOOOOOOO! One of his workers had a bandage on his face.... tried to shoe a horse without the grips... that had to hurt. Being me... I saw a front yard, very nice but not manicured. Found a push mower and went at it... push mowing in the hot sun is one of my weird fetishes. Eventually she noticed me, brought out homemade lemonade, two piece with that thin thingamabob over it. "Yousa sweatin' sumthin' mitey feerce.... mite need ta take 'em clothes off n cool off." She noticed it "peaked" my attention. Ended up in a loft above the barn that night.... couldn't get Green Acres out of my head.

So far we are doing quite well. She says we started dating in March.... I say April... who's to say. I went as far as to say, she is pretty much #5 but I may have jumped the gun. Noticed a few things.... things I would not have picked up on.... twenty years ago. Her dad is head of his household but... saying she has him wrapped around her finger.... understatement. The guys who follow my thread know exactly where I am going.... I'm just waiting for it to occur (my daddy does xxxx, you should for me too). If she reacts favorably... I kinda like our chances. Poor reaction... decision time.

But we are not far enough in to really see anything LTR. I'd like to think maybe a year... then address the possibility. It looks promising but I recall saying the same thing with... 1st love, 2nd love, Window Cork, 4th love after about six months. We know how those turned out now don't we LOL Ride the waves, see where it goes... hope things work out between us but be willing to walk away at ANY time. She already has Boner wrapped around her finger.... freaking bringing leftover steaks, chicken legs, hambones. He!! Boner runs up to her and barks at me -bring me what she's bringing- Damn lil schit LOL

I don't post that much anymore so some of my "journals" may be lagging a bit behind. A Hangover Crew buddy asked me -Alright music 5lut... what song personifies where you stand with her-

Either https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2Vg52eF4dPk or

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mHdwtRgq524

A-Every single thing that has ever happened in your life is preparing you for a moment that is yet to come.
B-We know what we are, but know not what we may be
C-Never make the person in your present pay for the sins committed by people from your past

Last edited by Chuck71; 08-26-2016 at 05:18 PM.
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post #23 of 76 (permalink) Old 08-26-2016, 07:35 PM
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Re: Crossroads III: The Launch

I don't know, Chuck... You look... I swear you resemble this guy who just told someone in the last 48 hours to focus on what is, not what may be...

"Our ability to feel joy is directly related to how much pain we are willing to feel." - Mavash.

"The truth is, everyone is going to hurt you. You just got to find the ones worth suffering for." - Bob Marley
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post #24 of 76 (permalink) Old 08-26-2016, 10:44 PM
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Re: Crossroads III: The Launch

"thin thingamabob over it" is a sarong, just so you can save on the words next time
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post #25 of 76 (permalink) Old 08-27-2016, 01:03 AM Thread Starter
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Re: Crossroads III: The Launch

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"thin thingamabob over it" is a sarong, just so you can save on the words next time


I've called it a thingamabob, doomyflotchy, hickeydoo, you name it.... for thirty years.

Never heard sarong in my life. Thanks for letting me know! Now I can more oppressively attempt to

hide "me Southurn die-a-lekt"


A-Every single thing that has ever happened in your life is preparing you for a moment that is yet to come.
B-We know what we are, but know not what we may be
C-Never make the person in your present pay for the sins committed by people from your past
Chuck71 is online now  
post #26 of 76 (permalink) Old 08-30-2016, 02:06 PM
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Re: Crossroads III: The Launch

Che cosa si chiamano That's how they say it in the south



Of Italia

Chuck Still havin youngens on the brain ?

55

ETA: Festeris is a good one too

Endeavor to persevere for your love and happiness

Give up on yourself and others will follow
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post #27 of 76 (permalink) Old 08-30-2016, 05:25 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Crossroads III: The Launch

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Originally Posted by just got it 55 View Post
Che cosa si chiamano That's how they say it in the south



Of Italia

Chuck Still havin youngens on the brain ?

55

ETA: Festeris is a good one too
Liked dem older women fer twenty-some-odd years. Gust tryen to balance the ekwashun.

A-Every single thing that has ever happened in your life is preparing you for a moment that is yet to come.
B-We know what we are, but know not what we may be
C-Never make the person in your present pay for the sins committed by people from your past
Chuck71 is online now  
post #28 of 76 (permalink) Old 08-31-2016, 04:14 AM Thread Starter
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Re: Crossroads III: The Launch

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I don't know, Chuck... You look... I swear you resemble this guy who just told someone in the last 48 hours to focus on what is, not what may be...
"But we are not far enough in to really see anything LTR. I'd like to think maybe a year... then address the possibility. It looks promising but I recall saying the same thing with... "

???

A-Every single thing that has ever happened in your life is preparing you for a moment that is yet to come.
B-We know what we are, but know not what we may be
C-Never make the person in your present pay for the sins committed by people from your past
Chuck71 is online now  
post #29 of 76 (permalink) Old 08-31-2016, 06:10 AM
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Re: Crossroads III: The Launch

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"But we are not far enough in to really see anything LTR. I'd like to think maybe a year... then address the possibility. It looks promising but I recall saying the same thing with... "

???
"Noticed a few things.... things I would not have picked up on.... twenty years ago. Her dad is head of his household but... saying she has him wrapped around her finger.... understatement. The guys who follow my thread know exactly where I am going.... I'm just waiting for it to occur (my daddy does xxxx, you should for me too)."

"Our ability to feel joy is directly related to how much pain we are willing to feel." - Mavash.

"The truth is, everyone is going to hurt you. You just got to find the ones worth suffering for." - Bob Marley
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post #30 of 76 (permalink) Old 09-14-2016, 10:32 AM Thread Starter
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Re: Crossroads III: The Launch

The 2007 stray / 17 mile returnee home in 2013.... he has a g/f. They lay in the yard / driveway / road together, go off in the woods together, lay side by side at night. Sad they can't get it on though... Window Cork accidentally grabbed him one morning when she was getting her brother's dog and cousin's (breeding was intentional) to be fixed. Truth told, he needed to be fixed though. He is the one dog remaining after BiLs dog died and Ty disappeared in Spring 2015. The comical part is they argue (bark / growl) about every night. I guess there is a justice of the peace for dogs somewhere in these parts. Lately he has been staying on the porch and she is in the neighbor's yard, several hundred yards away. Good thing they ain't got no puppies.

Things are coming along smoothly with the DC gal. She enjoyed a day of fishing... even baited her own hook unless it was a worm. She brought a picnic basket for the day... put a lot of time and detail into it. Quite impressed.... except for the wine she brought. Excellent idea but drinking in a National Park.... no jail time but Jesus H. Christ they fine you about $1200. To pour salt in the wound, they make you empty the bottle(s) right then and there. You'd think they'd at least let you finish what you brought, after all, the fine still stands. Tried to show her how to gut a fish.... "I'll cook if you clean 'em" LOL .... fair enough.

We took a trip to the beach awhile back. Lucked up and missed most of the rain. Had a great time. Was able to venture out a couple nights after she passed out. Nothing like pontificating at the beach. 3AM, Pink Floyd, etc... the usual. Hard to fathom it's been roughly 30 years ago. Felt eerie seeing a couple teens walking on the beach, slowly due to the fact they were making out every third step. Talk about reflection overload. Back then... pop was alive, "mom" was, Angie. Jeff is but... we may speak every five years. Life goes on... no schit.

Was able to find a bar which carried Ngoma beer! "I wanna try it!" Three of those and I almost carried her to the car. $25 a six pack now. Eight Ngomas and you see Led Zep playing in the ocean.... stay away from the ocean! We did venture into the Wally World late at night... see all kinds. We agreed I cook breakfast, light lunch and go out for dinner. Was a nice bar near the room, had kick arse Boston cover band one night. One cover did Loverboy's -Heaven in your Eyes- .... was a very nice slow dance. Bartender and I spoke a bit one night.... -thought she might have been your daughter till you had your hand on her arse- Not quite used to this.... being I spent two decades dating older women.

Walking on the beach was nice... it's about the only thing that has not changed. The old 1-2-3 story mom n pop hotels are all but gone.... replaced by 18-story high rises. I get the fact of purchasing land and maximizing profits but.... plus the huge billboards and flashing lights. There were triggers.... not to 2nd love though. I dug a hole big enough to fit my fat arse into... DC slide in between my legs and drifted off to the waves crashing. Romantic.... yes. Waking to each other... yes. Hearing 47 kids screaming at 6AM...... nooooo.

One thing I did learn, DC is competitive. Putt putt ... never heard a female say -I can't believe I missed that fvcking hole- Course being a guy, I ad-libbed and... she was not overly amused. Okay.... Chuck this sounds like an awesome mini vacation, right? Anytime I vacation or lived a good distance away.... I always called and let mom know I was okay and / or enjoying myself. Can't do that anymore. Bothered me more than I thought it would. Old habit I guess. Life's all about change. Grass will always be green, sky will always be blue.... everything changes.

I made sure to stop at the very same gas station I always have since 1996. It's right off I-75 before Atlanta. Go in, use bathroom, grab a $10 ticket. Have always won, at least the $10 back. Most I won was $500. This time.... just won $12, $2 if you count the ticket. The store is on my "therapy road." Nice hour's drive, not far away but quite a few small town speed traps. One town -you are entering xxxx- you can hold your breath and see -you are leaving xxxx- before you exhale. Only in the South.

All in all... it's been a good summer, would have been great if not for....... Was amazed when DC got on to me about not keeping my skillets seasoned. -Stop wiping the grease out- Was amused at DCs reaction to my clothesline out back -I think you've lost your damn mind- "If I was 24... I'd have said the same thing." DC still thinks chopping wood, knife tossing and push mowing a huge yard with a riding mower in the garage is a bit weird.... but I'm cool with that. I may change one day... but I doubt it.

On a lighter note.... looking forward to following the last broadcasts of Vin Scully... 67 years. Ever since I can remember, Scully's voice was announcing baseball games. Peete Rowse, Steeve Garrvey, Dayle Muurfey. Baseball... 35 year love affair. 2nd love swore baseball was my mistress. One by one... all the players I watched as a child through HS, all have retired a good while back. Quite a few have passed on. I can still see Joe Niekro spinning his knuckleball, Tug McGraw closing out a game, Mark Belanger starting a double play, and Tony Gwynn slapping out another hit. 67 years is more than enough Mr. Scully... thank you for the many summers you captivated my consciousness with stories from long before I came along. October 2 will be his final game.


Van Hagar 5150

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=STVcNX7anGU

A-Every single thing that has ever happened in your life is preparing you for a moment that is yet to come.
B-We know what we are, but know not what we may be
C-Never make the person in your present pay for the sins committed by people from your past
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