You made a comment to reflect on, "I just feel so trapped. I am 45 and I need to figure out what to do now before its too late".
"Too late" is a prison of our own making... while you are aware of it, you actually have a handful of keys in your possession, you just need to find the right one but remember to not quickly discard all the others as you may need them for future doors.
The thing is, we often do cast aside those keys not realizing their importance, but the cool thing is we are our own key maker.
Your children will adapt to a different home, involve them in the process of looking for one that suites you all and is not a burden in any form. They will also adapt to a different school... these changes build and strengthen as long as the love is not changed.
We all know our work is what we put into it... if you are bored it may help to spend some time looking for your calling, but be sure you are listening to your heart as well as your mind. In the mean time, there are ways to jump start your alignment of happiness and work, but you can apply this to anything. https://www.ted.com/talks/shawn_acho...rk?language=en
Purpose... I believe this is why we exist, each day we have needs to make a difference for somebody, somewhere, somehow. Never forget random acts of kindness, those touch more hearts than one imagines. This can be as simple as rescuing a shopping cart from a mother with small children in a parking lot to helping your neighbor get the trash out when they forgot and already left for work. Observe and listen... the world is full of ways one can make a difference to somebody, and the rewards are incredible for building ideas and understanding for self.
Exchanging a day of one's life feeling lost is a path no one wants... you have so many good paths awaiting you.
Be the peace you deserve...
"We all have two lives. The second one starts when we realize that we only have one".