My terrible order was that my first wife, the mother of my children, got my DD and DS on Christmas Eve and Christmas morning, every year. I don't know how that happened. I don't remember. She must have had me over a barrel somehow.
In any case, I didn't even know how to handle the pain, so I prayed and went to church. I gave to the angel tree for some anonymous child to have something for Christmas. I helped decorate the church.
It did help me. I am not telling you to do the same. I'm just letting you know that I feel your pain.
There is a thread in Social that someone started about Christmas plans or something. It has a similar flair as this one, though it is not in this kind of detail, we can all see that folks are hurting and unsure of what to do. No one really has an answer that is guaranteed to work for you. Just try to make it your holiday and see your children, as one member posted, on the week before Christmas with all of your family.
It's just a date. No one really is sure when He was born, but it is believe to be in the spring. So, make it your day to celebrate, whatever the date, and do so with the fervor of Festivus, as one member reminded. Check out the thread and see what they have to say. It helped me to put this Christmas in perspective.
I know it feels better when you can give to someone and make them smile a little. That's the spirit of Christmas.... Giving with love and no expectation of a similar gesture. Christmas Strategies