So, we're now over legally.. Question. - Page 3 - Talk About Marriage
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post #31 of 37 (permalink) Old 01-26-2017, 04:23 PM
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Re: So, we're now over legally.. Question.

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Am I that screwed up for wanting to do this?
Do yourself a favor OP.

Grab some paper and a pencil. Get sh!t faced drunk and pour your heart and guts out in the letter telling her EVERYTHING you've ever wanted to say....

Then burn the letter. There's your closure. She's not worth the $0.46 stamp or the satisfaction her seeing you so weak will give. Closure is for YOU, not her.


“When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time.” - Maya Angelou
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post #32 of 37 (permalink) Old 03-17-2017, 05:27 PM
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Re: So, we're now over legally.. Question.

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I just would like to thank the legislators of the world for ruining what was once a beautiful and meaningful institution. Now, it's just a business contract between two people and the State. How sad.
The legislators didn't ruin marriage. They ruined divorce. Actually I think the legislators did what they could, the attorneys are the ones that really run the show, to their own benefit.

If your marriage was healthy you wouldn't be complaining about the divorce laws.

Oh and by the way, marriage IS a business contract. Nothing more. It's been that way for at least the past half century.
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post #33 of 37 (permalink) Old 03-20-2017, 03:12 PM Thread Starter
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Re: So, we're now over legally.. Question.

Never understood the professional shots. One can see them a mile away. I did take some new shots of myself and uploaded them. I have more interest, however, it's hard for me to manage more than one woman at a time due to also running a hectic business and putting out fires. This was a lot easier ten years ago.
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post #34 of 37 (permalink) Old 03-20-2017, 03:13 PM Thread Starter
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Re: So, we're now over legally.. Question.

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The legislators didn't ruin marriage. They ruined divorce. Actually I think the legislators did what they could, the attorneys are the ones that really run the show, to their own benefit.

If your marriage was healthy you wouldn't be complaining about the divorce laws.

Oh and by the way, marriage IS a business contract. Nothing more. It's been that way for at least the past half century.
Isn't it funny that most legislators ARE in fact LAWYERS?
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post #35 of 37 (permalink) Old Yesterday, 07:18 AM
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Re: So, we're now over legally.. Question.

It's moot but the taxes should have been addressed in the settlement.
The 'investments' were assets and most likely marital assets.
They must have been called out in the property settlement as well as the tax obligation generated from any portion liquidated.

This was a big miss on the part of the op and his wife and their attorney(s).

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post #36 of 37 (permalink) Old Yesterday, 04:54 PM Thread Starter
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Re: So, we're now over legally.. Question.

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It's moot but the taxes should have been addressed in the settlement.
The 'investments' were assets and most likely marital assets.
They must have been called out in the property settlement as well as the tax obligation generated from any portion liquidated.

This was a big miss on the part of the op and his wife and their attorney(s).
No, not really. I wasn't after her gains. I am the one who managed the investments, and she had about a 30% gain due to my work. I didn't want to fight nor cause any further issues between us. I just wanted the signed piece of paper. Mine were thansferred to a third part prior to marriage; which was discloused to her prior to marriage as well. She stated she forgot, however a signed piece of paper helped her jog her memory.
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post #37 of 37 (permalink) Old Yesterday, 05:22 PM
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Re: So, we're now over legally.. Question.

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Yep, just amazing. I basically drained my savings to untie the knot. They've effectively killed the institution of marriage in my eyes. A prenup doesn't protect a person from insane legal bills. It was more to get divorced then to get married. I was taught marriage was such a wonderful thing. Maybe, at one time it was. Now, with these crazy lawyers, I just do not understand why anyone would do it. Would you believe, just to get an update on the status of the divorce, it would cost me 80 - 180 dollars for an e-mail response? It's highway robbery as far as I am concerned. What are you going to do? There is nothing that can be done. I hear it's even worse in Canada or Australia. I just would like to thank the legislators of the world for ruining what was once a beautiful and meaningful institution. Now, it's just a business contract between two people and the State. How sad.
Not quite true in Aussie. My ex and I had zero costs to divorce except for about $100 to lodge the paperwork. We wrote our own settlement and had FREE but mandatory pre divorce mediation.

The real problems start when the parties involved choose to fight through Lawyers then the costs can be in the 10's of thousands. It is such an overheated, emotional time but when you think about it logically it is stupid to pay loads of money to Lawyers when in the end the court has a fairly set formula for settlements and child custody so there is no point fighting. We did 50/50 co parenting from day one which is standard for most cases unless one parent is not fit to have more custody.

As for closure, I knew I would never get it from MrH v.1 so I wrote myself a letter as if it was from him, I wrote all the things I needed to hear to get closure but knew he was not capable of saying. I kept the letter for some time then one day about 2 years later found it while clearing out some paperwork, read it again for the last time then tore it up. writing this letter really helped me move on in a healthy way. Mind you our marriage did not end due to cheating or any other abuse.
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