Re: Moving after divorce with a manipulative ex wife.
Just remember, she can only manipulate you if you allow her to. So don't react. Don't respond, Just be indifferent. She has lost the "right" to affect who you are, what you are or where you are going.
I suffered a similar fate during my divorce. As long as she got what she wanted, everything was fine. I was a fool and took her at her word. I accepted her niceness as a sign of potential reconciliation and went along. Alternately her anger I took as a sign I was being unreasonable. Hoping that by being "reasonable" and "generous" that she would see that I truly loved her and wanted to remain married. In the end it cost me. I was very resentful when things still fell apart and my efforts went unrewarded. But in hindsight, it had been those same on-going efforts to appease her all along, which really had made me so miserable while I had been married. In the end, I have come to agree, that whatever I lost, it was the best money I ever spent. Now, I am free. I am free to have a truly personal one on one relationship with both of my children as well as their spouses. After the divorce she bought a condo, was living the life and seemed to be doing well. Later on I heard she was working two jobs to make ends meet because she had lost the high paying job (in her mind) she had had. Karma?
Just don't allow her to manipulate her. Let her go ballistic, it is no longer your problem, it has no effect on your life, so let her vent. As long as she is rewarded for her effort, she will continue to make it. Take away her reward and she will soon tire of trying.
At the center of every moMEnt of my life is ME!