My Three Angers - Page 2 - Talk About Marriage
Life After Divorce Divorce is complicated, and change is never easy to cope with. Use this section for help and advice on living life after a divorce.

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post #16 of 17 (permalink) Old 03-23-2017, 09:11 AM Thread Starter
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Re: My Three Angers

I cant say I was a good husband. I know I had faults. But I was loyal to my family. I did not go out party or do alcohol or drugs. I did not beat my wife. I came home every night. Did I show love like I should have? probably not However, I did nothing to hurt my children and affect their lives forever. I can live with my sins and have come to terms with my part in the issues of our marriage. But I did not cheat or betray my family.

Regardless of all that. Im glad to see im not the only one who still struggles with anger. Its good to read how others were able to get past it.

I guess its still a journey I am going on and will take time. Im trying to focus on the good and most days I do. But sometimes I am overwhelmed with feelings of absolute hatred.

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post #17 of 17 (permalink) Old 03-24-2017, 04:14 PM
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Re: My Three Angers

OP, you have heard a lot of great advise and view points here. I too have dealt with the same issues. I saw a couple of counselors over the past two years.. The last one I felt really showed me the way. Not that the first one was bad. I probably would have ended up in the same place around the same time. But the last one has been really good for me. I thought about 6 months ago I was out of the woods. Then over the past few weeks I started feeling the anger well up again and again. Usually I was able to bottle it up and tamp it down so that it didn't control my life. This in itself really bothered me because for the most part my life has improved well beyond where it had been even prior to the end of my marriage - better relationship with my kids, more money, more time, new experiences etc. But I still felt this anger. I hadn't been to see my counselor for over two months, but just this past Wednesday I went to see him. He told me what I was feeling was normal. Sometimes the anger is needed to make you remind yourself how much better off you are now than you were then. Don't let it consume you, just keep reminding yourself that life is better. Much of that anger is because some old idea is dredged up. Sometime you just need to dredge it up so that you can change that old idea and replace it with a new better way. Eventually, once you complete your transition to a new way of thinking, the anger will not be an issue any longer.

At the center of every moMEnt of my life is ME!
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