It seems like a year has gone by and yet, it doesn't. Time really does fly.
I've learned that life does, in fact, go on. You learn to laugh again, to smile, to try new things.
Still have moments where I wish our marriage didn't fail but I realize that the past is gone forever now.
My life is different. I have not dated yet but I am looking forward to it some day and find myself horny. (It's been awhile).
ExH never did apologize for what he did but I've come to the realization that day will probably never come. And that is ok with me now. My ex's dating sites ads are still up--the same one(s) that were even when he was saying he wanted to reconcile. It's funny to think the first one I discovered was back in 2008. That was a long time ago. And yet it doesn't seem like it at the same time. I have stayed NC w/ him & only hear about him from mutual friends now. The last thing I heard was his house got broken into.
I've got some new goals for this year and a few items on my Bucket List I plan to cross off and new things I want to try (including, perhaps, making out with a hottie).
No clue what the future holds but that is one of the things that makes life's journey fun.
@Jelly if you were closer I could help you cross of the make out with a hottie bucket list item
Quote:
Originally Posted by FirstYearDown
Since you are so horny, I pray that you will find a gorgeous stud who will ravish you every night.
You guys are cracking me up.
And Firstyeardown (how appropriate is your name for me today!), we both cheated. There was a lot of hurt. With that said, I feel so much more at peace now. He was emotionally abusive and I am glad to not be dealing with that anymore (or his incessant farting).
hey, cool. My divorce is officially "in effect" today (or maybe tomorrow? signed by judge on mar.5 in effect after 31 days, so yeah today).
It was about a year ago, give or take, my ex was pursuing her affair partners, 11.5 months ago got the "ILYBINILWY, we are great roommates and best buddies but you just can't keep up with me because I need so much more from my life", 11 months ago as of yesterday was my Dday.
Jelly, you are divorced, if you want some one to date, kiss, make out with, cuddle, have sex with, whatever you want, there is no reason for you to not go out with the intent of getting it, like today. I did even before my D, found someone else on the rebound looking for what I was and we both enjoyed and got some loving we both craved... no regrets at all. Now I find myself looking for something new and different, I plan to just enjoy meeting people and live organically, maybe if I find a keeper work on a relationship. Life is short, a year can be a long time, you are entitled to seek what you want!
hey, cool. My divorce is officially "in effect" today (or maybe tomorrow? signed by judge on mar.5 in effect after 31 days, so yeah today).
Congrats, Lon! Big things.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lon
Jelly, you are divorced, if you want some one to date, kiss, make out with, cuddle, have sex with, whatever you want, there is no reason for you to not go out with the intent of getting it, like today. I did even before my D, found someone else on the rebound looking for what I was and we both enjoyed and got some loving we both craved... no regrets at all. Now I find myself looking for something new and different, I plan to just enjoy meeting people and live organically, maybe if I find a keeper work on a relationship. Life is short, a year can be a long time, you are entitled to seek what you want!
Good advice about dating, etc. And lol about "meeting people live and organically." That is how I like to meet people, too. Am not one for dating sites, plus if I used those, I'd probably run into my ex. Eh, no thanks.
This topic has been on my mind a lot lately as I just passed the year point. But, then again, it was over a year since she started her affair. So, even though we were married she had a year of "dating" under her belt before the divorce and they are now getting married soon. Guess my exw's affair is going to be one of the 5% or so that actually makes it.
Jelly, you should start dating. You sound like you are ready for that. I started a long time ago and was not ready but had a couple of mini-relationships. They were fine and dandy and were very nice girls and I do think they prepared me for something more substantial in the future. When I first started dating I was looking for a replacement relationship. Didn't realize that until much later but that is what I was doing. Now, after a year I am happy with myself and the direction my life is beginning to go. I'm getting to the point where I know what I want and what I will settle for. Think you are at that point as well from the sound of it.
Tell all of your friends that you are interested in dating again and to keep you in mind if they have any friends or know of anyone who is single as well. That's what I did because I am not the type of guy that can walk up to a woman I don't know and ask them out. I feel like a creeper doing that.
Anyway, best of luck. Hope you land a good one that will give you some attention, someone to have fun with, and perhaps even someone to unleash that built up sexual frustration.
This must be the season for splits, I passed the year of separation mark february 24th.
I think the year of time to look at things, take care of me, and have to deal with hubs with an out (since we don't live together) really gave me the perspective I needed to know at the very least, what I don't want.
and go get yourself a stud jelly, you deserve it Amazing what a year can do for you isn't it?
Good for you, Jelly! I wish I was as far as you in my attitude. I'm a year out, too, from separation and my attitude is kind of poopy right now. I don't know if it's because it's been a year or I'm just in a funk. But glad to see you're doing so well.
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A year 
