If I am every sort of vulgar insult you can possibly come up with in the worst possible ways..why on earth, does he need to contact me?
What is it about my uncharming, empty, bitter, cold, undeserving existence that he can't get over?
he's sent his penis around the internet, he's "gone on dates" with other "hotter" girls, I'm selfish, self serving, godless, bad in bed, just make something up and add it to the list and it's probably been thrown at me..
Yet, if we go more than two weeks without talking, I get a text, or like today, 6 texts. It's pretty freaking simple, I'm pretty freaking clear on this. We don't get along, we aren't compatible, I don't do pity sex, and there's no point to our conversation.
so why do I keep waking up to this, if you hate me? Why bother with me if I am SO undeserving? Why is it I can't go NC and carry on with my life, like you keep announcing you're doing, and how i need to and have that last?
Why are you prying around trying to find out anything I could have been doing? why does it matter?
I left you, I "abandoned" you, I have no empathy for your feelings, I never appreciated the amazing man you were/are I'm just a selfish ungrateful *****, so what is it that is SO appealing about that, that makes you unable to leave me alone?! ugh!
my apologies, but I needed that rant. and perhaps, if he hadn't blown our bank account on drugs, I'd be able to afford a divorce, instead of having a pile of bills to pay off and no money to do it with.
Stop taking the bait. He wants you to. Discuss nothing but divorce and co-parenting issues with him. If you don't shut him down and set boundaries, you can expect more of the same. Posted via Mobile Device
I'm so sorry. What an incredibly frustrating thing to deal with!
He's said all there things out of anger and in an attempt to alleviate himself of guilt. Then he can't help but try and fish for info about what that amazing, smart, stunning woman who left his sorry butt is up to.
My ex has done the same sorts of things to me. All a huge game for him, I'm sure. Just remember you're so much better and deserving of more than that loser.
Just ignore it all unless is vitally important (I'm not sure whether you have kids or not).
Bottom line is, don't play his game. He isn't worth the time. You are. So keep on pushing ahead with your life and take care of you. Don't be sucked back into his bs.
Leave the fool to waste more money on calls and texts that go unanswered.
I think that's what tweaks me. A lot of things are projection.
I can honestly and confidently say, I am ok with our past, I am happy that it's an experience I had in my life, I truly love him, and while it's sad things turned out to be the mess that they were, I wouldn't have traded it for anything.
And I keep being told I'm bitter, Im not over it, I can't handle him being happy etc.
The lack of logic and perspective is what kills me. I rarely rant about it. I think the stress of my ring case being re-opened, the things going on around the house lately, and general existing stressors just made me over flow.
i know I don't deserve any more of that, and I feel he doesn't deserve what we do to each other either. It's not healthy for anyone involved.
He probably saw a few shards of your self esteem that he'd missed and he wants to come back for them, too. You're trying to make sense of something a druggie does or says? On my police job, I've met Batman, Superman, Spiderman, Jesus Christ, the Devil, General Patton, Napoloean....you name it. They all have lots of very profound things to say.
He probably saw a few shards of your self esteem that he'd missed and he wants to come back for them, too. You're trying to make sense of something a druggie does or says? On my police job, I've met Batman, Superman, Spiderman, Jesus Christ, the Devil, General Patton, Napoloean....you name it. They all have lots of very profound things to say.
ha, I just snorted my coffee, I can so relate to meeting those people too.
I've even spent nights talking to the "other" version trying to talk sense into it before he really did damage to himself
he hates the thought that you've moved on - mine's the same
he's the one that left, yet he's the one that's offended because I took at the wedding pictures down - what am I going to do, dufus, keep a shrine to a marriage that's been a lie for the past 6 years? Sit rending my garments and stroking a picture of your face all day?
ha ha dolly mine wondered why i took the wedding pics down too. if you werent across the pond i swear we married the same man. Posted via Mobile Device
he's been back today with his game face on, being all business like and civil
seems to forget that I could always see through him like a pane of glass
he is genuinely expecting me to fall at his feet and wants to feel like I can't live without him. He doesn't want to come back, just hates the fact that I've moved on
Stop taking the bait. He wants you to. Discuss nothing but divorce and co-parenting issues with him. If you don't shut him down and set boundaries, you can expect more of the same. Posted via Mobile Device
He reaches out when he needs your emotional support, a temporary and transient act to reach out for the sole purpose of meeting his needs. It’s a very sick cycle that drains and hurts. I know because I was in this cycle for too long. I loved him so much & put his happiness first when I should have known it was one sided. Foolish in love. You don't deserve any more pain. He doesn't deserve any more of your energy.
yes, he does have some issues with crutching. I guess I feel bad for allowing myself to be his crutch for so long, and then removing it..
I more or less get frustrated at the logic and the insane turns and swings things take depending on what mood he's feeling at the time.
But, I believe that the brutality of reality is very important for a person to face and deal with themselves, so when someone runs from it, it really makes no sense to me.
He came into my job and apologized to me last night. I'm not sure what possessed him to come in, or what he thought might happen, but I guess he feels better having explained himself and run out the door, who knows?
I certainly don't. but thanks guys for reading my little purge of rawr about it
8Likes
why? 
He reaches out when he needs your emotional support, a temporary and transient act to reach out for the sole purpose of meeting his needs. It’s a very sick cycle that drains and hurts. I know because I was in this cycle for too long. I loved him so much & put his happiness first when I should have known it was one sided. Foolish in love. You don't deserve any more pain. He doesn't deserve any more of your energy.
