07-29-2008, 07:03 PM
Join Date: Jul 2008
| | Now married 30 years after cult upbringing.
I've enjoyed reading everyone's thoughts on this topic. Cindy's remarks gave me goosebumps, and the courage to jump in on the topic. You see my marriage was also a struggle in the beginning because I was raised in a polygamist church and my hubby and I were commanded to marry by our religious leader. (I know we were stupid to obey, but these cults have great power over their young.)
To make a very long story short, we escaped the group when I was nine months pregnant (only nine months after our wedding!) and continued a monogamous life in a normal society. But because we were young and did not know each other well, and had never been on our own, we went through hell.
We are living proof that two people can learn to love each other if they are committed to it -and we were for our baby's sake. At times it seemed impossible, but we made it.
One of my secrets was to always reach out and touch my husband even if I felt hopeless. I could see that we were both suffering - it wasn't just me. We would swallow our pride and give each other a hug even if we had just had a major blow out!
I have heard it said not to let the sun go down on your anger, and I believe it is one of the things that saved our marriage.
Kim's book Daughters of Zion is now published!
Last edited by one wife; 02-03-2009 at 09:40 PM.
Reason: new info