01-16-2011, 09:22 AM
Join Date: Nov 2010
| | Yesterday was my anniversay....17 years
and ive been struggling with not feeling emotionally connected to my husband. We have five kids, the two oldest just moved out and so we are left with the three youngest. Life is take up with working, worrying about bills, running the girls back and forth to activity during the week. He usually watches the game during free time and I chat on the internet. Ive been feeling this way a long, long, long time. I try to tell him what i need but im obviously speaking "woman" cause he dont get it.
He's an awesome guy. Runs kids around, does laundry, cooks, cleans, good sex, works, just seems very complacent. Feel we have stopped growing together. We go out on date nights (not for a while) and i dread them unless its a movie. Dinner is painful because we dont have anything to talk about. Talking about "feelings' leaves him with this look of dread on his face.
We have raised awesome kids together. But im 41 today and want to feel excited about life with im and I dont. I can see myself, when the last one leaves for college, just bouncing and getting my own spot to go i guess, discover myself on my own terms. being doing a lot of introspection trying to get out of my own way on the road to happiness. My fear is that while i work on me he stays the same and there will come a time when i wake up in the morning and think....today is the day, pack my stuff, and kiss him goodbye.
I used to wonder why people woud bother getting divorced after being married so long and now i know why.