This has been a huge challenge for my wife and I with 3 kids (7, 5, almost 2). In particular the 2 yr old daughter has given us a run for our money these past two years, but i think we are slowly starting to come out of the dungeon ...
Fortunately we have never had issues with the fire burning, just finding time to put it to good use. We still actually like each other, physical attraction has never been a problem, our personalities compliment each other nicely (Or as I like to think of it, I am just an all around easy guy to get along with
), and we work well together as a team. Currently, finding time alone together though has been rather difficult, and we are somewhat limited in our options. During the week I am out of the house from 5am-7pm. On Saturdays my two son's have sports (4 games between them of which I coach 3) so even though I am off from work I spend much of Saturday away from home and my wife.
During the week it is usually hit or miss how much time together we can get (depends on when we get our daughter to sleep which can be anywhere b/w 9-10:30pm). I usually try to make it a point though to spend at least a few minutes before we go to bed curled up watching tv. If I find myself falling asleep in bed while waiting for my wife to come in from putting our daughter to sleep, I will actually spread myself out across the entire bed so she has to wake me up in order to get in lol.
Also, in the past I would usually take days off from work when the kids were home from school. Now I try to do the opposite, take a day here and there when all the kids are at school so my wife and I can have alone time, which translates into bedroom activities followed by a lunch date
Right now though I find it is more important to do the little things to stay connected (a surprise kiss, hugs, quick massages, etc...)