A Good Marriage - Page 3 - Talk About Marriage
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post #31 of 51 (permalink) Old 06-21-2015, 03:08 AM
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Re: A Good Marriage

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Raising my hand to also say.. didn't see anything wrong with your post Technovelist.. she could have jumped into the conversation .... I don't really get it. It didn't sound like you or the guest snubbed her.. did you?
No, and she didn't claim that we did, just that we "excluded" her by discussing things that included at least one topic that she normally is interested in but didn't want to discuss at that moment.


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post #32 of 51 (permalink) Old 06-21-2015, 03:23 PM
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Re: A Good Marriage

You can't expect people to be banned just because they write a comment you don't agree with. Free speech, man. Users are free to post their opinions, albeit in a respectful manner, and others are free to agree or disagree with them.

Clearly, some TAMers appreciate technovelist's viewpoint, some do not. The same freedom that allows him to express his opinion is the same freedom that allows you to voice your dissent.

You can't demand that someone be banned simply because they post something you disagree with. If a TAMer is abusive or bullying of other TAMers, if s/he posts graphic/explicit material, if s/he is trolling, etc, that is all basis for banning.

Feel free to review the forum posting guidelines if you need a refresher:
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You may not agree with what technovelist posted, but he also hasn't posted anything that would warrant banning. So I would suggest that you drop it.

~Happily un-married since December 9, 2013~
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post #33 of 51 (permalink) Old 06-21-2015, 03:28 PM
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Re: A Good Marriage

I think most women act a little silly on occasions.

I know most men have silly idiosyncrasies that good wives learn how to navigate.

I think the best marriages happen when men and women learn the differences in each other.

I don't take being called silly on occasion as an insult.
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post #34 of 51 (permalink) Old 06-21-2015, 03:33 PM
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Re: A Good Marriage

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FeministInPink
Are you kidding me?
First of all, you should really change your username.
Second..substitute the word 'women' with 'black people' or 'gay people' and then tell me that ANYONE who would say something like that wouldn't be violating the forum rules.
You should start a thread. I am friends with a few gay folks, men, and they act silly more than occasionally. They admit it.
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post #35 of 51 (permalink) Old 06-21-2015, 03:53 PM
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Re: A Good Marriage

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you should be banned, not Kitt. How DARE you?

You can say people act silly on occasion but making that a gender issue..is REVOLTING.
You are SHAMEFUL.
I kinda look at it this way.... Men get in a MOOD too sometimes.. and many a woman will say "MEN!!!...and add "___________".. (you can fill in your own blanks).. rarely would a Man care or make a deal out of it.... cause men are wonderful LIKE THAT !!

Like not listening or seems they always want Sex.... just as women can have PMS ...and get overly emotional at times ... ( >> not all women !.. do we really need a disclaimer for every sentence we type... so it doesn't cause outrage??

Pulling into a Supermarket hrs ago... we heard some women yelling "What the F*** are you waiting for!!!"... Everyone in our car was like "WHOOOAAAA!!"... feeling bad to whom she was yelling at (Heck it's Fathers day!)..... I didn't see her -only heard it...was assuming she was yelling at her H or BF.. but I guess she was hanging out the window yelling at the car in front of her.. (a guy -- I don't know)...

It was so obnoxious.. yet you couldn't help but LAUGH .... Husband was commenting that's why men don't want to get married.. "Who'd want to marry that!.. then he said.. "Who needs to go to hell, whoever is married to that is already there !".. we're busting up...so was our daughter...

Oh goodness.. if we can't acknowledge that our own gender royally gets out of hand sometimes.. Please get me a ROOM !@#$ ... Women F*** up too... we have our moments...if you never do... then God BLess you. your husband is a LUCKY MAN... But come on.. we all know some in our own gender can "loose it" sometimes..

Hopefully on both sides of the aisle.. we can laugh about these things.. like @ConanHub attitude.. "so what if you call me silly!"...I AM... It's all good !

We all have Bad moments.. who is immune here ??.... it helps tremendously if we apologize afterwards.. myself & husband always do this... it's like it's washed in the ocean...this goes a long way.
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post #36 of 51 (permalink) Old 06-21-2015, 03:57 PM
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Re: A Good Marriage

Well, Bugged, the part you quoted also says to treat others with dignity and respect. I have seen numerous posts from you which gave done the opposite. I'd say that makes you as guilty. JMO

You seem to have a lot of anger pent up. And, it seems to be directed mostly at men. I saw nothing wrong with tech's post. In fact, I actually laughed a little at the part you find so REVOLTING . I found it amusing. Why? Because most of the women I do know ARE, in fact, like that. And I could easily substitute men, gay people... pick one. And I know others in each group. Lighten up, girl. Damn.
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Originally Posted by Bugged View Post
He's stating that women act silly BECAUSE they're women..he's not saying PEOPLE act silly on occasions (arguable)so since she' a human she acts silly ..he's saying that SINCE she's a woman she' s expected to act silly.



Do you think I'm stupid or what?

You can use the 2x4 without adding nails to it.

Last edited by Maricha75; 06-21-2015 at 04:09 PM.
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post #37 of 51 (permalink) Old 06-21-2015, 04:41 PM
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Re: A Good Marriage

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really? Find them and share them. I'll be here waiting...



really? Find these posts and share them. I'll be here waiting...
Anyone who wishes to check SecondTimeRound's thread regarding surnames would certainly see what I mean. But, they really don't even have to go there. All they have to do is look at how you have blasted @technovelist for his observation of a situation with his wife.

You have found sexism in almost every post in just these two threads thus far. And, those of us who see no issue with the ones who you are calling out, obviously, we have a problem.



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your problem
I don't see it as a problem.

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really...it's really sad..you should choose your acquaintances better.I cant' stand people that act silly and I don't know a lot of them, thankfully...I mean anyone that's over 20...
Oh, so now the condescending tone toward a woman. That's ok. I don't mind. There's nothing wrong with being silly at any age. It's a matter of knowing when it is or is not appropriate. In fsct, one such time was at the elementary school my children attend. The principal, age 35, let the children throw pies in his face. This was a reward for one of their fund raisers. He had so much fun, and was EXCEPTIONALLY silly. The other adults enjoyed it as well. That's my point. There is a time and a place to act silly. And to limit it to under the age of 20 would be rather dull. Even my 65 year old dad acts silly at times. I wouldn't have it any other way. There is nothing wrong with those I choose to spend time with. They know when to be serious and when to be silly. Thank you for your concern, though. I will give it the consideration I feel it deserves.

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post #38 of 51 (permalink) Old 06-21-2015, 04:45 PM
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Re: A Good Marriage

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Originally Posted by Bugged View Post
you're just a stalker.
I'll put you on my ignore list.
A stalker? LMAO! No, I commented on a thread, two threads in fact, that you happen to be lambasting men in. But I am a stalker. Hahahahaha

Ignore me... like that is supposed to upset me? ok, then.

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post #39 of 51 (permalink) Old 06-21-2015, 04:56 PM
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Re: A Good Marriage

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A stalker? LMAO! No, I commented on a thread, two threads in fact, that you happen to be lambasting men in. But I am a stalker. Hahahahaha

Ignore me... like that is supposed to upset me? ok, then.
Can I get her to ignore me too? What's your secret?

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post #40 of 51 (permalink) Old 06-21-2015, 05:05 PM
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Re: A Good Marriage

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Originally Posted by Bugged View Post
FeministInPink
Are you kidding me?
First of all, you should really change your username.
Second..substitute the word 'women' with 'black people' or 'gay people' and then tell me that ANYONE who would say something like that wouldn't be violating the forum rules.
Why? Because I am not a militant FemiNazi? Because I don't see sexism every post by a male TAMer? Who are you to take away my feminist card? If I choose to self-identify as a feminist, that's up to me and not you.

I am well-aware that there is systemic sexism in our society. It isn't all going to go away overnight. I pick and choose my battles, because one can't be on the defensive or attacking all the time. It's no way to live. And really, we're all just trying to understand one another. That's it. And I have no qualms about that. But you're getting all up in arms over semantics in a chat room.

Why are you so angry? From what I can tell, you spit fire at every poster on TAM who dares disagree with you. You're not open to civilized debate, you're on the attack all the time. Why?

If you want to have some real fun and attack some TAMers for sexism and the like, go on over the the Men's Clubhouse and have at it. I'm sure you'll be very popular.


~Happily un-married since December 9, 2013~
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post #41 of 51 (permalink) Old 06-21-2015, 05:06 PM
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Re: A Good Marriage

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Can I get her to ignore me too? What's your secret?
Idk, tech. All I did is call her out for calling others out. And actually having fresh reproaches from her own fingertips as proof. I have a fairly good memory, so it wasn't hard to find/remember what was posted in just the two threads. Like I said, idk what the secret is.

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post #42 of 51 (permalink) Old 06-21-2015, 05:11 PM
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Re: A Good Marriage

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I cant' stand people that act silly and I don't know a lot of them, thankfully...I mean anyone that's over 20...
Bugged,

What's wrong with acting silly? My wife does all the time (and she happens to be a woman) and it's one of the reasons I'm so attracted to her. She reminds me not to be "Mr. serious" all the time.

She's taught me a LOT about just having fun and forgetting about the daily grind, which was a large weight on my shoulders being the sole bread winner most of our marriage...Being silly is pure fun!

Occasionally, doing stupid sh*t is fun too.

Last edited by T&T; 06-21-2015 at 05:19 PM. Reason: spelling
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post #43 of 51 (permalink) Old 06-21-2015, 05:29 PM
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Re: A Good Marriage

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this has got nothing to do with the following..sorry guys..distractions don't work
I was asking you why you thought people over 20 shouldn't act silly. Why do you feel that way?

It was an honest question and not an attempted distraction. I have no fight in this...
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post #44 of 51 (permalink) Old 06-21-2015, 05:33 PM
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Re: A Good Marriage

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I'm not angry, I'm logical...waiting until tomorrow to see if someone will make something about this SEXIST post...all the people on this 3d can go on AND on trying to defend the indefensible...if one states a specific behaviour is a matter of GENDER that's sexism. Full stop..that is NOT an opinion... that is a FACT.

If one said pubicly that most black people, because they're still black people, are expected to act silly on occasions...as opposed to people that are not black, otherwise one would not say black people, but people...well.GOOD LUCK with that.

Feminism has a prerequisite that you don't seem to have IMO.. the ability to spot a SEXIST and condescending post.
The last time I checked (which was about 30 seconds ago), the definition of feminism was about supporting/advocating social, political, and all other rights of women equal to those of men.

Funny, it didn't mention a prerequisite about chat rooms...

From what I can tell, technovelist's post didn't infringe on anyone's rights. It might be offensive. But it didn't actually tread on anyone's rights.

I'm just a reasonable feminist, rather than a militant, angry one.

~Happily un-married since December 9, 2013~
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post #45 of 51 (permalink) Old 06-21-2015, 05:37 PM
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Re: A Good Marriage

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silly as in fun is one thing
silly as in annoying, self-contradictory, illogical, erratic..is another.
We're not talking about fun here.
Okay, fair enough, but I didn't read his post as meaning irrational.

My wife is very rational but knows when/where to let her hair down and that's exactly how I read his post.
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