Re: Advice for a young couple
My wife and I have been married for 20 years, together for 22. We have two daughters (14 and 12).
I don't have any sage advice for you. Much of what has been said in other posts works for us. I think, at least for my wife and I, the reality is this:
1) Divorce is not an option. I take marriage seriously and am willing to do everything in my power to make it last. That means I need to have respect for my wife and be willing to make changes as needed to make the love deep and lasting. Too many young people these days see marriage as expendable. Never bring up divorce. NEVER! No matter how angry you are.
2) respect your spouse. He/she has feelings, hopes, dreams, and needs like anyone else. Work with him to meet those needs and express your own.
3) Children are hard work and will stress your marriage more than anything else you can imagine. Give your marriage time to settle for a while before bringing kids into the picture. My wife and I waited 6 years before trying for kids.
4) Sex is an important part of marriage, but it isn't the MOST important part. Have fun and enjoy each other. Spice it up if you need but don't introduce others into your sex. It usually leads to problems. Buy toys and do other things to spice it up a bit.
5) Always have date nights, even after kids have come into the picture.
6) Keep your marital issues between you and your husband. If you need more, get a counselor. Your friends and family are not equipped to give good advice. They will ALWAYS take your side which builds resentment between you and your husband and between your confidant and your husband.
"You are talking about the nonsensical ravings of a lunatic mind!" Victor Von Frankenstein