ntiedo

I have been married for twelve years and i will say i am an authority to talk about marriage life. In marriage there are many factors that contribute to successful and long lasting marriage relationship.
1, UNDERSTANDING:For a successful marriage to to take place there must be proper understanding between the two couples.The two couples comes from different background sometimes with different culture and religion so there isthe need to understand each other.
2, TOLERANCE: tolerance is one of the greatest key to marriage. If the two couples can tolerate each other's shortcoming, weakness and mistake they will enjoy long lasting divorse free marriage
3,HUMILITY:Humilityis a very essential ingridient in marriage expecailly on the part ofthe wife the wife must humble her self in regardless of her status inthe society or her financial empowerment.
I wiil highlight more factors that contribute to successful and long lasting relationship.

preso

I think the first and most important thing is to marry the right person... someone whose core values reflect yours.
If you get that right, the rest is do-able... if not, you have a lifetime of problems and upset.

Sprite

I totally disagree that humility is the job of the wife mostly. This only leads to resentment in anger in years to come. Humility has to be equal. I have been married 20 years, and have experience in that department. A wife that humbles herself more than the husband ends up with an issue of loosing herself. She forgets who she was to begin with.

MarkTwain

Yes. I would feel cramped by a subservient woman.

There are times in a marriage where either partner is better off uttering the occasional "yes dear", than arguing at that precise moment. Then later when the mood is better, things can be more productively picked over.

Saying sorry the moment you are accused of something is another good way to diffuse rows before they get going. It's all ego anyway. If somebody's ego is at the helm, it does not help to meet ego with ego - that always leads to war.

__________________
MT

preso

sorry to say but I cater to my husbands ego...
if I don't someone else will.

men need that stroking much more than woman.. I'm strong enough to let him think he's the boss

some would say thats acting subserviant, but I call it being smart...
after all its him that goes to work everyday to pay the bills, not me.

Feelingalone

I may go to work every day to pay the bills, but if I'm not humble as well I believe Sprite is right. In the long wrong only trouble and heartache find you will.

Sensitive

# 1 and 2 started off good, but #3 sounds completely sexist. Many wives are financially independent, and are not subservient to the husband. I agree there needs to be some sort of mutual humilty.

Jessee

You're so right about that! How can we discuss all these points if we hate the person next to us and the hate is mutual. From this comes misunderstanding, intolerance and so on. Let's be realistic: choose the right person and you both will get everything you need in your marriage
_________
cuban cigars

Ivi&J03

I would agree with #1 and #2 as well.
What about this:
#1 Time - The amount of time a spouse gives to the other in their marriage says a lot about the amount of commitment they have toward each other.

#2 Patience - Goes hand in hand with time but, really, this is the love of your life. Sometimes, husbands or wives wouldn't even treat a STRANGER the way they treat their spouse.

#3 (The big one) Communication - This can be easier said than done, no pun. Being able to communicate with your spouse might actually be THE key ingredient to maintaining a successful marriage.

Just my opinion. Thanks for letting me share

wrhaven

Its good that you have found what works in your marriage. It would be interesting to see if your wife feels the same.

However, it takes two people to have a successful marriage. What may work for this couple may not work for another couple. If this is what works for you and your wife, then CONGRATS!