Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: At the local coffee shop
Re: What's the formula?
Don't cheat on each other either emotionally or sexually.
Have an independent sense of self worth; don't look for your spouse to make you whole or fill a void in yourself.
Be able to laugh easily, don't take everything seriously. Having a good sense of humor will take you far in life.
Pick your battles; not every disagreement is worth getting mad about. You don't always have to be right or have the last word.
Don't let small issues grow into big problems. Nip problems in the bud before the issue gets bigger than both of you. If you're having problems talking about certain issues, don't avoid them. Over time those issues will become huge issues. Conflict avoidance is not a good strategy for marriage.
Learn to fight right without sarcasm, mockery, insults. Easier said than done, but a good skill to master.
You're a team. There's no "I" in team.
Be a good listener. Try to understand things from your spouse's point of view.
Be a good communicator. Don't assume your spouse knows what you want or can read your mind. Explain things clearly and with examples especially if you're talking to your husband. Remember that nonverbal communication speaks louder than verbal communication so stop the eyeball rolling and other rude gestures.
Have a solid friendship with each other underlying your marriage.
Make room for fun each week. Married life isn't all about the bills, the kids, the housekeeping, your work obligations. Forget to have fun with each other and you'll soon find that your spouse has found someone else willing to have fun with him/her.
Make sure you both agree on money matters and your sex life which are two things that often drive a couple to divorce.