shy_guy

There are so many words there that I'd have to quibble with before I knew how to answer your question. I don't do statistical analysis on people around me on things like that ... I'm not sure what someone would mean by "dream marriage," and I'm not sure what it is that you saw specifically that prompted you to say, "I'm not sure I believe in things like that anymore."

For my part, I no longer remember much of what I dreamed marriage would be other than dreaming it would have good sex (which I didn't even know how to define at the time), and that I would grow old with someone I really loved. My marriage is that. My marriage has had its moments and its moments, but overall, it has been VERY happy. If I had it all to do over again, knowing everything I know now, I'd choose the same woman, and marry her even faster than I did the first time. She's the only one I want to be with. I'll have to take her word for it when she tells me the same about me. We've been married for 27 years, and I think these days are the best so far ... looking forward to them getting even better.

Coffee Amore

"A bit seasoned and salty at times"...that's how I see you too.

No, I don't think of what you write as bragging. If it's bragging then brag away! You have every right to brag plus this forum could use more stories like yours. Your posts are filled with such honesty, not to mention graphic descriptions that will make anyone blush.

You're a special lady. Keep posting updates. I don't always respond, but I read what you write.

Jeff/BC

Well... I, for one, am very glad you DID write it.

Jeff/BC

Well, I'm not Dean and I don't think I'm in any position to be telling other people what they ought to do or not. But my own answer to that question is that you're about as likely to find a dream marriage as you are to find the winning lottery ticket in the gutter. Sure, it could happen, but it's not something that I bank on.

I think "dream marriages" aren't found... they are built... brick by brick.

SimplyAmorous

All the stories here are so very different... I consider me & my husbands marraige one so free flowing, I would liken it to a Dream, every love song we hear is "ours". Sure we argue sometimes & have bad days, but that is normal. We quickly make amends & life is beautiful 95% of the time. We have 6 kids too, they keep us hopping but we count it all JOY.....we are living our Purpose & Destiny.

We have only been with each other in this life ....we met young... we even used to joke .....why the heck does everyone say it gets worse after you marry... cause we always felt it got BETTER!!! Like..what the hell are those people talking about!!@#$%^

For us (different from *Deans* experience.).... me & my husband were both rather mature in our teens, never the partier type...never had temptation to follow any crowds either, neither of us cared for sowing oats ....... we both had dreams of meeting "that very special" someone that would steal our hearts & never let go....I was 15, he was 18...met at the lunch table of a new school.

We quickly became Best friends, even before we had our 1st kiss on a walking trail... We rambled on about our future for years before we married, writing letters back & forth, we were inseparable... my gf's used to get mad as it was all about HIM once he entered my life.....we had it all planned out...Work hard, save like mad... find a country home, work on it together, have some kids, he wanted to provide while I stayed home (both of us very frugal).....I was to be the SAHM, barefoot & pregnant....our dream = to find a country Farmhouse somewhere, I used to think I wanted to marry a Farmer...but he was just a Dairy Manager at a Grocery store. Close enough!

I swear we were always on the same page in our hopes & dreams, every goal... what we seemed to enjoy in life ... we both hated sports & loved getting off alone togehter, movies, rock concerts, country walks...It is what filled our days & hearts.

Our personalities are very different.. .Me the feisty , energetic, assertive chick meets the shy passive laid back guy who gets a charge out of my enthusiam -sometimes a bit heightened .....even when I get a little mad ... I get myself in some trouble with my mouth, he just shakes his head...Loves me anyway... I get irritated & annoyed... he has the fine ability to make me laugh at myself. It works very sweetly. What he lacks, I seem to have.... and what I lack... he seems to posses, so when we come together .....WE make a glorious whole.

As most marriages....we missed it in a few areas ....one was me having some "good girl" hang ups for too many yrs in the bedroom ...then a monkey wrench of Infertilty after our 1st son .... but even then , those years were still amazing ......then after 5 more kids in our 30's ..... I came into my Sexual Awakening (which led me to this forum -damn that was a WILD RIDE! ).......alot like ThreeTimesAlady here ........ never dreamed things could get so HOT !!

I thank God every day for this precious gift of a man in my life... he's never let me down.

He still reaches for my hand even when we are in the Suburban driving down the road -with a truck load of kids behind us. Just taking a walk in the back yard is "a date" for us, him picking me flowers across the feild, who needs special roses bought! Not this wife.

He is a very devoted faithful loving man -a "one woman" man... a phenomenal Father (everyone loves Dad!), an exceptional pleaser in bed... what more can a woman ask for !

I feel when 2 Hopeless Romantics come together in this life, they are very very hard to separate. That is what we are... and we treasure that in each other...keeps us on a "high" every day....


The Hopeless Romantic Male...do you enjoy sappy movies with your wife or GAG & run?

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The Lurker

Glad you guys are still happy together after all those years!

jameskimp

Very touching and interesting

Cosmos

What a wonderfully uplifting and inspiring thread. Thank you so much for sharing with us, Caroline.

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When the past calls, let it go to voicemail. It has nothing new to say.

Cosmos

Caroline, one of my sisters has a marriage that sounds a lot like yours. She's in her 70s and her H is in his 80s, but their love and for one is as strong as it ever was.

I agree that the trouble for many couples is when the start to go in different directions and forget why they are together...

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When the past calls, let it go to voicemail. It has nothing new to say.

TroubledSexLife

This is a very interesting narrative.

Coffee Amore

Good to see you posting again.

Don't delete you posts. There are many of us who enjoy reading your thread.

It's great to see how passionate you two are for each other even after all these years.

oncehisangel

Miss Caroline.

I came on this morning-just a girl from Australia-disillusioned, a little pessimistic and more than a little jaded with the thoughts that anyone of today's time could actually achieve a 'till death us do part' relationship any more.

My beautiful parents were role models for myself and my siblings.

They were testimony to the fact that this could be true- that a couple could stay together and work their issues out if they had any, and make it smiling, and still in love, till one had to leave. A loving life long marriage was not an unreachable dream.

My dad passed away seven years ago. I remember clearly the night before he died.

My mother was cleaning the toilet. She was cheerfully spraying one of those lavender air sprays into the small space after vigorously using a brush around the bowl.

But this was not a cheerful event.

We had just got dad out of the bathroom and she was doing this while I tried to ease him back into the bed. He was losing his insides and the ablution moments were not pleasant. No-one complained of course. It was a harsh reminder, however, that time was fragile and we didn't have much longer with the hero of our family.

The bathroom was directly opposite a short hall to the bedroom. If you were on the bed you could see it.

It was a struggle for me to get him to lay I kept saying "Dad, lie down, please. What are you doing?" I was laughing a little as he kept twisting his head and moving his body so he could look towards my mother cleaning.

The smell of that lavender spray drifted into the bedroom and replaced the reminder that death was knocking hard against our families door.

I remember pausing and watching, as there, in that small bathroom with the spray raised in her hands, my mother turned her head over her shoulder to smile at my father. She looked much younger, her eyes held the flirtation of a young girl.

Time did stand still after-all.

The knowing smile between them filled that sad moment with years of love. It held everything their union meant-memories, respect and adoration and even youth.

As their daughter I felt like an intruder for a second but then so very privileged to witness what one divine smile between people you loved could hold.

My father then met my own gaze on him and his smile would be etched into my memory forever more.
He said, "Isn't she just the most beautiful woman you have ever seen sweetheart?"

It was hard to hold back the tears.

"Yes, daddy. Yes, she is."

He died the next day surrounded by people who had loved him. My mother rested her head into his neck as she said , "It's ok to leave now darling."

Her last words-. "Thank-you for our love."


In the passage of time, of my own first marriage breaking down and then the failure of my second 15 year relationship-I often wonder whether it still remains-that there can be a person for me that will look at me as his most beautiful woman right till his last breathe.

Could love be something that was worth fighting for?

It is a simple ask-yet it seems people have given up on each other and we have become disposable in our relationships. And yes, after that horrible event with those poor children it makes you question what has become of us.

I believe in the power of love. Of one relationship to make it. To get old, to carry a family right to the last bus stop. Sometimes, on days like this though its hard to hold that dream.

Caroline-please don't stop sharing your knowledge, stories, thoughts and wisdom. Through your longevity in your relationship-which reminded me of my parents-maybe we can learn again.
Maybe one person will take something from you and work a little harder on their own marriage.

Thankyou for your time away from your husband to allow us the opportunity to perhaps gain some insight to what many of us may be doing wrong.

love and continued peace to you and yours. God Bless. x

Decorum

Tears in my eyes. Thank you oncehisangel!

oncehisangel

Ah, dearest Caroline. I was a bout to log off when I saw your post.
Then I was about to highlight and copy what I loved the most-but I can't....every word speaks from your heart and they all worthy of a copy and paste.

thank-you once again....♥

I look forward to more posts.

Have a wonderful Christmas with your husband and family.
God Bless
love and peace xx

sandc

Threetimeslady, you are awesome and awesome is ageless. Wonderful post!

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