A picture of cougars twerking has made me a neanderthal that hates Girl's Night Out
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Old 09-15-2013, 06:53 AM   #1 (permalink)
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Default A picture of cougars twerking has made me a neanderthal that hates Girl's Night Out

My wife's life is typical suburbia. She has several groups of friends the library mom's, the karate moms, the church mom's, the workout moms etc.. I've gotten to know all of them and to me they all seem as normal as pumpkin pie. Loving responsible wives and mothers. Well one of the groups decided to do a girl's weekend away this weekend, and my opinion has changed a bit.

After looking at the photos they posted I'm glad my wife didn't go. They were only at their destination for a short time before the ill advised facebook pictures started popping up. My wife showed me a picture with a look of disbelief on her face.

These moms that I thought were so wholesome were twerking on one another. Also based on the photos they were drinking a lot and it wasn't even late yet. I found it both humorous and disturbing at the same time.

The more I thought about it though the more I became disturbed by it. If they are grinding on each other now what will they be doing at midnight? Why would they post this pic when they have daughters and husbands at home that would see it? Lastly, they are too damn old to be twerking!

Perhaps my thoughts on this are over the top but if my wife posted pics like that I would throw the kids in the minivan and tell them we are going to go get mommy. Sometimes people need to be saved from themselves.

Yes, I know it was just a picture, but to me it showed that some of these neanderthals around here might have a point. There very well might be something to this whole group think thing they were ranting about. I can't imagine that any of these women individually would think what they were doing was a good idea. They didn't even have good enough judgement to realize that posting the pics was a bad idea. I can only imagine how freaked out their husbands were by the pics.

So my question is, is my reaction just TAM induced paranoia or do I have a point? I will add that my wife after seeing the photos feels like she really didn't know them as well as she thought she did. But, perhaps she is being too judgmental to.
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Old 09-15-2013, 07:08 AM   #2 (permalink)
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Default Re: A picture of cougars twerking has made me a neanderthal that hates Girl's Night O

Can I see the pictures?
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Old 09-15-2013, 07:23 AM   #3 (permalink)
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Default Re: A picture of cougars twerking has made me a neanderthal that hates Girl's Night O

When my wife goes out with the girlfriends....they are always very TAME. Sometimes, I WISH they would let loose a little more and she would come home and jump my bones or hear about some new sex move that she wants to try...but it never happens.

In your case, I wonder if these Moms were just capturing something outrageous and extreme just to get a reaction out of others? Wait and see how these same ladies describe their night out later to your wife. I also suspect if they were all drinking early, it probably turned into an early to bed night.

Keep us posted...
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Old 09-15-2013, 07:35 AM   #4 (permalink)
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Default Re: A picture of cougars twerking has made me a neanderthal that hates Girl's Night O

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Originally Posted by I Notice The Details View Post
When my wife goes out with the girlfriends....they are always very TAME. Sometimes, I WISH they would let loose a little more and she would come home and jump my bones or hear about some new sex move that she wants to try...but it never happens.

In your case, I wonder if these Moms were just capturing something outrageous and extreme just to get a reaction out of others? Wait and see how these same ladies describe their night out later to your wife. I also suspect if they were all drinking early, it probably turned into an early to bed night.

Keep us posted...
I like that thought, but I don't like the idea that grinding around with some other guy got her there and she is just using me to get off...
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Old 09-15-2013, 08:51 AM   #5 (permalink)
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Default Re: A picture of cougars twerking has made me a neanderthal that hates Girl's Night O

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I like that thought, but I don't like the idea that grinding around with some other guy got her there and she is just using me to get off...
I concur, I don't mind my wife letting her hair down but I should be the dude she is getting freaky with on the dance floor, and I certainly would not approve of her putting on this type of show for the enjoyment of other men.

But, in their defense they weren't grinding on guys they were only doing it to each other. Even with that said if I were a single dude that saw this behavior I would only assume that these ladies are ready to partay.

To the poster that requested a picture I can't do that. They posted it but I assume it was only meant for their social media friends.
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Old 09-15-2013, 08:57 AM   #6 (permalink)
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Default Re: A picture of cougars twerking has made me a neanderthal that hates Girl's Night O

Let me see if I can put this into context.

Firstly, I live in the Caribbean, and this new " twerking " craze that has recently hit the US has been here , well forever. It is a way we dance and express ourselves. The term we use is
" wineing ."
Yes, its very sexually suggestive , but it is what it has always been, a form of art or cultural expression. Both men & women of every age and background do it and alcohol is not always involved, just sweet music.
It is the way we dance.
I suspect that this dance came from the Caribbean to the US, via many of the US pop stars , celebs and rappers who come here for fun and to party.

Here's a small clip of a street carnival party / parade;

Trinidad Carnival- Harts 2013

Observe there are people of every age , male and female.

Here's another vid of Rhianna grinding and bumping her lady parts at a similar street party in Barbados a few weeks ago;

Rhianna At Crop Over, Barbados.

Just to put everything in context, this type of dance is very normal down here,it's how we party.
Women grind on women, women grind on men and so on.
Some couples might agree before to only dance with each other, some might go to a party with a group of friends and agree not to grind on strangers, only grind with those in the group.
And still some might just grind on anybody, male or female.

However I can fully understand the cultural shock this type of dancing would bring into a society that is not accustomed to it.It is a very sexually expressive type of dancing.
My wife is not the partying type , but I remember when I was single and hitting the clubs, my date and I would hang out with a group and only dance like that, with those in the group, male and female. She danced with other men, I danced with other women.

I can fully understand why it would be disturbing to a husband at home and his wife out there grinding on a strange man in a club under the influence of alcohol.
However I wouldn't have a problem if my wife did this with ONLY women in her all girls group , if I wasn't around..
I see it as a way of " letting her hair down ", and expressing herself in a safe environment with other RESPONSIBLE women.

But it's better to be around your wife or SO and enjoying some fun. It is a very subtle form of sexual foreplay and the rewards are usually reaped in bed immediately after.
However if either partner is not present, there should be a level of caution.
Things can head southwards, very fast.

Last edited by Caribbean Man; 09-15-2013 at 09:16 AM.
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Old 09-15-2013, 08:57 AM   #7 (permalink)
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Default Re: A picture of cougars twerking has made me a neanderthal that hates Girl's Night O

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Originally Posted by I Notice The Details View Post
I also suspect if they were all drinking early, it probably turned into an early to bed night.
You make a valid point. When I was in my 20s I could drink early and still go out. Nowadays if I crack open a beer before Monday night football kickoff I'll end up waking up to infomercials and not knowing at what I point I dozed off. For whatever reason as I've aged drinking just makes me tired. The buzz doesn't feel the same as it did in my youth. Which is why I drink a lot less now.
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Old 09-15-2013, 09:05 AM   #8 (permalink)
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Default Re: A picture of cougars twerking has made me a neanderthal that hates Girl's Night O

How do you think the wives would have reacted if their husbands posted similar pics with random women at a bar? That's something their husbands should ask them. People often don't think of the feelings of others until they get a taste of their own stupidity.

Their husbands should say nothing. Go out the next week and post pic of them grinding on women. Then come home and still say nothing. I bet wifee will stay home to stoke the home fires.

But then again, I am not a good person and two wrongs blah blah.....
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Old 09-15-2013, 09:14 AM   #9 (permalink)
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Default Re: A picture of cougars twerking has made me a neanderthal that hates Girl's Night O

It's not Neanderthal, it's actually a pretty good policy for married people to avoid such situations. Not every member of the group has good intentions. Some want to stir up trouble and make problems for others. Misery loves company, as they say.

I choose my friends carefully. I have had to break ties with some who were not healthy for me or my marriage. My wife has had worse luck with friends. One in particular advised her to hide her spending from me and offered to help her buy things and "launder" the transaction. Forntunately, she told me about this and their fri dship fizzled shortly after. Another who was going through a divorce seemed to be trying to recruit my wife into the divorce club.

Girls nights out can be a great thing for a marriage, if the group consists of the right people. If even one is a bad apple, they can really take advantage of someone in a vulnerable position. Particularly when alcohol is involved. It's a sad reality that there are people out there who make sport of manipulating others into bad situations.

This is not so much a gender thing as a character thing. Some women cheat at girls nights out. Some men cheat at bachelor parties. What they have in common is low character. People with an intact moral compass are much less likely to do the wrong thing, but it is always better to avoid such situations entirely.
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Old 09-15-2013, 09:33 AM   #10 (permalink)
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Default Re: A picture of cougars twerking has made me a neanderthal that hates Girl's Night O

Quote:
Originally Posted by Caribbean Man View Post
Let me see if I can put this into context.

Firstly, I live in the Caribbean, and this new " twerking " craze that has recently hit the US has been here , well forever. It is a way we dance and express ourselves. The term we use is
" wineing ."
Yes, its very sexually suggestive , but it is what it has always been, a form of art or cultural expression. Both men & women of every age and background do it and alcohol is not always involved, just sweet music.
It is the way we dance.
I suspect that this dance came from the Caribbean to the US, because many of the US pop stars , celebs and rappers come here for fun and to party.

Here's a small clip of a street carnival party / parade;

Trinidad Carnival 2013 - Tribe Experience.

Observe there are people of every age , male and female.

Here's another vid of Rhianna grinding and bumping her lady parts at a similar street party in Barbados a few weeks ago;

Rhianna At Crop Over, Barbados.

Just to put everything in context, this type of dance is very normal down here,it's how we party.
Women grind on women, women grind on men and so on.
Some couples might agree before to only dance with each other, some might go to a party with a group of friends and agree not to grind on strangers, only grind with those in the group.
And still some might just grind on anybody, male or female.

However I can fully understand the cultural shock this type of dancing would bring into a society that is not accustomed to it.It is a very sexually expressive type of dancing.
My wife is not the partying type , but I remember when I was single and hitting the clubs, my date and I would hang out with a group and only dance like that, with those in the group, male and female. She danced with other men, I danced with other women.
I can fully understand why it would be disturbing to a husband at home and his wife out there grinding on a strange man in a club under the influence of alcohol.
However I wouldn't have a problem if my wife did this with ONLY women in her all girls group , if I wasn't around..
I see it as a way of " letting her hair down ", and expressing herself in a safe environment with other RESPONSIBLE women.

But it's better to be around your wife or So in times like these, because things can head southwards, very fast.
Well..... I didn't want to touch on this aspect in my original post but some of what you said is why my wife was disappointed. My wife and I are both black americans that grew up in the south and twerking was just normal dancing to us.

Had my wife been there its highly likely that she would have been a little offended for two reasons. One, they probably weren't doing it right, and the other in the back of her mind she may have thought they were making fun of her.

One of the reasons why I was so shocked by the images is because I highly doubt that any of these woman even knew what it was until recently. So to me it represents a drastic departure from the norm for them. Also, I can't speak for the Caribbean but in general this style of dancing is really more for young women around my way.

All I know is that this type of dancing is very sexual in nature. That coupled with booze and husbands not there could equal trouble. Why not test those new twerking "skills" out on a guy to see if you really have it down?

Twerking is powerful stuff if its new to you, and great power power requires great responsibility
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Old 09-15-2013, 09:41 AM   #11 (permalink)
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Default Re: A picture of cougars twerking has made me a neanderthal that hates Girl's Night O

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I suspect that this dance came from the Caribbean to the US, via many of the US pop stars , celebs and rappers who come here for fun and to party.
Close!

Twerking has been part of the bounce music scene out of New Orleans for at least 20 years, with part of the origin coming from the "Traditional African" dances that caught on with (especially hip hop) dancers in the early 90's.

A brief history of twerking.

So, it hasn't been here forever...but it's been here for most of my life at least.
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Old 09-15-2013, 09:41 AM   #12 (permalink)
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Default Re: A picture of cougars twerking has made me a neanderthal that hates Girl's Night O

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Caribbean man, I understand what you are saying about your culture. I know you said this but: the problem is, it is not our culture or history. These "grinding" moves have not been around for a long time and are not a way we express ourselves here.
This is basically what I said in my reply to CM. Leave the twerking to the professionals!

Okay, I'll be serious now. In all honesty my concern is if you aren't accustomed to the type of attention this kind of dancing can bring you as well as the sexual chemistry that can happen when you dance this way with someone of the opposite sex you could be playing with fire.
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Old 09-15-2013, 09:48 AM   #13 (permalink)
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Default Re: A picture of cougars twerking has made me a neanderthal that hates Girl's Night O

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Originally Posted by Catherine602 View Post
How do you think the wives would have reacted if their husbands posted similar pics with random women at a bar? That's something their husbands should ask them. People often don't think of the feelings of others until they get a taste of their own stupidity.

Their husbands should say nothing. Go out the next week and post pic of them grinding on women. Then come home and still say nothing. I bet wifee will stay home to stoke the home fires.

But then again, I am not a good person and two wrongs blah blah.....
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They were twerking with their female friends though not men.
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Old 09-15-2013, 09:59 AM   #14 (permalink)
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Default Re: A picture of cougars twerking has made me a neanderthal that hates Girl's Night O

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Lastly, they are too damn old to be twerking!
In all seriousness, this is just wrong. People are only old if they act old. People even in their 80's should be out skiing, ocean kayaking, dancing, twerking, having sex, and enjoying life. There's nothing wrong with adults of any age having fun.

The rest of the situation you describe brings up some worries. I agree that doing this on a girls weekend away and posting the pictures on fb isn't good judgment.
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Old 09-15-2013, 10:12 AM   #15 (permalink)
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Default Re: A picture of cougars twerking has made me a neanderthal that hates Girl's Night O

The beauty of being single is that you can pretty much do as you please and not worry about how others feel about it.
But, in the end, you still have to live with yourself.
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