I am allways the one who initiates sex in our house.Wish huby would once in a while but we usually go through weeks and a lot of badgering before we have sex.I would love the hubby to come into kitchen and just give me a quickie.Mkes me so mad cause e is always soloving and says e loves me which i know e does,yet the sex is nearly none existant.
I don't understand why some guys have a problem being the initiator. I feel like, if she initiates, it's nice, but it's not mandatory. To me, there's a huge difference between always being the initiator vs being shot down all the time.
I don't understand why some guys have a problem being the initiator. I feel like, if she initiates, it's nice, but it's not mandatory. To me, there's a huge difference between always being the initiator vs being shot down all the time.
Correct!
I guess as long as none of the partners is turned down then why it matters who the initiator is?
Exactly. All these wives that post "I don't necessarily initiate, but I wouldn't turn my husband down, either". Man, we should all be so lucky. I would totally take that situation over one where I was rejected constantly.
here is a quick realization for you. There are a lot of men that do everything you do plus more and everything that you and the other women think we should do. We still get no appreciation and our wives don't initiate sex. I'm a full time college student too, and I work 50+ hours a week. So, whats my wife's excuse, and the other wives excuses?
Quote:
Originally Posted by lisa1994
Hi, Guys, there are many times I long to have sex but it seems like he doesn't have any desire at all. women has so much to do in the evening, dinner, homework, make sure all the kids washed and go to bed on time, clean dshes, check emails, paying bills, by the time I go to bed, he is sound sleep.... guys, if you want to have sex, help your wife to do chaos, help your wife with kids, then she will lay down at the same time, you will get want you want... I do want him to make love with me all the time, but I don't get it because he is sleeping by the time I got into the bed. so who to blame?
Here is the difference. If the guy is always the initiator, even if they do not get turned down. Then it is still a bummer. All it shows it that she is willing to have sex to make him happy for the moment. Doesn't show that she ever actually wants it or him. To me that is worse than being rejected.
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Originally Posted by lovelygirl
Correct!
I guess as long as none of the partners is turned down then why it matters who the initiator is?
OK, First of all we have been married for 7 years now. All this hoopla I've read on these past posts is ridiculous. If the woman never initiates sex it is the same as being turned down. The only reason she is doing it is to shut the guy up. If you have to always initiate sex, and the woman never does, then there is a problem. First of all let me explain some things. I work full time +, I go to college full time, I am the one that does most of the house work plus cooking dinner, I am the one that does the yard work. She does some but not near as much as I do. Ok, so that all the stressfull crap. Now, I do everyday tell her how much I love her, how good she looks, do all kinds of little things for her( back massage, foot rub, hold and kiss on her, ect.), but she has no desire or interest in sex. Let alone be the initiator. It has been this way for 5 years. So, all you women that are such experts tell me what am I doing wrong????? Oh, and as far as us guys should be happy that we are getting it. Well, my wife and I haven't had sex for about 2 months now. I'm not happy with just getting it. If she cannot initiate and show me she has some interest in me and what I do for her, well I'll do without and masturbate.
What and men never do that stuff? I am in charge of all of that in my household. Plus do all the little extras for her. She never initiates or is interested. So, I have stopped trying. Would rather masturbate.
Quote:
Originally Posted by lisa1994
Hi, Guys, there are many times I long to have sex but it seems like he doesn't have any desire at all. women has so much to do in the evening, dinner, homework, make sure all the kids washed and go to bed on time, clean dshes, check emails, paying bills, by the time I go to bed, he is sound sleep.... guys, if you want to have sex, help your wife to do chaos, help your wife with kids, then she will lay down at the same time, you will get want you want... I do want him to make love with me all the time, but I don't get it because he is sleeping by the time I got into the bed. so who to blame?
Wish my wife was more like you. 95% of the time we are together she has an orgasm. About 75% of the time is the squirting kind. For the past 5 years of our 7 year marriage she never initiates sex. I have given up. We have not had sex in 2 months. I feel if I do housework, work full time, go to college full time, and worry about the bills, plus do all the little things a guy should do for his girl, then I should not have to initiate all the time. She seems never interested even though I DO know she has the big O quite often. I have given up and resorted to Rosey and her five 10 sisters.
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Originally Posted by greenpearl
Surprised?!
I am blessed with a horny body!
I started to enjoy sex when I was 18, and I have never stopped enjoying sex and orgasms.
OK, First of all we have been married for 7 years now. All this hoopla I've read on these past posts is ridiculous. If the woman never initiates sex it is the same as being turned down. The only reason she is doing it is to shut the guy up. If you have to always initiate sex, and the woman never does, then there is a problem. First of all let me explain some things. I work full time +, I go to college full time, I am the one that does most of the house work plus cooking dinner, I am the one that does the yard work. She does some but not near as much as I do. Ok, so that all the stressfull crap. Now, I do everyday tell her how much I love her, how good she looks, do all kinds of little things for her( back massage, foot rub, hold and kiss on her, ect.), but she has no desire or interest in sex. Let alone be the initiator. It has been this way for 5 years. So, all you women that are such experts tell me what am I doing wrong????? Oh, and as far as us guys should be happy that we are getting it. Well, my wife and I haven't had sex for about 2 months now. I'm not happy with just getting it. If she cannot initiate and show me she has some interest in me and what I do for her, well I'll do without and masturbate.
oh wow!
Have you ever told her that it'd be nice if she initiated too??
Do you have a good communication with each other?
My ex never initiated sex. And eventually, everytime I tried to be spontaneous and initiate it, she shot me down. I'm a romantic and a gentleman, but when I tried to be romantic and turn her on, I ended finding that I was left feeling blue, upstairs and downstairs. That wasn't meant to be a joke, but I'm trying to make lighter of a situation that has really been infuriating me.
I always initiate sex with my husband and he constantly turns me down. We'll be sitting on the couch and I'll ask if he would like a blowjob and he'll turn me down. It's heartbreaking. Posted via Mobile Device
Lots of women like to be chased and dominated. Initiating to me is difficult but I would do it every once in a while so long as he ravished me often. Men who can't be manly and don't show me that they find me super sexy aren't attractive to me. Posted via Mobile Device
After trying different things for the last 12 years, it is now my wife who has to be the initiator. Not really my choice, but when I initiates, she rarely wants to have sex, and she gets annoyed because of the 'pressure'. So I have to wait for her, basically. Having said that, when she is in the mood (which is not very often), she doesn't exactly initiate as such, just 'lets it be known'. I then normally have to make the actual moves
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Re: Does your wife ever initiate sex? 
