nice777guy

Trying to change things up a bit.

What are some more masculine ways to work on yourself?

In the past, I've always thought about yoga, meditation, etc., etc.,

Not sure I'm ready for MMA training, but a heavy bag hung in the garage for pounding on sounds pretty good right now.

Suggestions?

Had a doctor once tell me that men do better when making contact with things - gave the example of the driving range or batting cages.

Mom6547

My husband finds what I consider extreme workouts to be awesome. The goal is actually to meet Mr Pukey. Wind sprints, heavy lifting for time...

nice777guy

Is golf considered "Manly"?

okeydokie

i havent ever really cared if it was, but it makes me forget everything for 4 hours

nice777guy

Have actually considered buying a gun - just to use at a shooting range.

Freaking my wife out would also be a nice side effect...

AFEH

Try what's coming to you "naturally" for example yoga and meditation. I got into Buddhism, whole new way of thinking about things and the meditations excellent. I used to spend a lot of time on golf, had some lessons and went downhill from there. Left it alone for two years to get thoughts other than where to hit the ball out of my head, it worked a dream, my natural swing had space to get back into my head. I’ve never hit the ball so well before.

Contact is important. I put up two punch bags, a ball and a multi-gym. It’s magic, I warm up on the punch bags and then get on the multi-gym. All I need on them is 20 minutes and the endorphins start flowing, I find it a real high. I’ve always been very “right sided” so I started strengthening my left side while working out. I was out in the garden weeding and discovered I was using my left hand as much as my right. That’s never happened before.

Are these “manly” things to do? I don’t know. I do know I enjoy them and get a lot out of them. Way back when some days I used to get nine holes in on the way to work. The sun’s coming up, empty course except for me, a wonderful experience.

Bob

txhunter54

Join a gym and start weight training. Take a firearms safety course and then go to the range and shoot. Sporting clays and skeet are fun shoots. Get into pistol shooting. IDPA and steel targets are fun. Take up archery. Take up golf. Go fishing. Lots of good choices.
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nice777guy

Bob - I'm drawn to things like meditation - but I'm wondering if thats a problem. Like I need to balance that with hitting something!

AFEH

Isn’t that a bit like saying you think the waters too cold to go for a swim without actually feeling the water, or just jumping in? You wont know until you try it. I chose Buddhism, there’s some fantastic books out there. I’m not very good though, one of the teachings of Buddhism is that you don’t “preach” it, you just “do it, be it”. And there I go with a little bit of preaching.

I think we go through phases in our life where some things have more meaning than others. Meditation and the like are what I see as working on the soul and the spirit. So maybe you’re feeling the need to do some soul and spirit work. I say go with that natural inclination and it will help you. I think I’m a “man’s man” I don’t actually know. I do know us men have a spirit and a soul and I do know I neglected mine for a very long time. It’s a bit like taking care of your “inner garden”, we learn how to water, feed and weed it so it grows nicely and can be left alone for a time while we tend to other things. You just may need to go on a bit of an inner journey, that’s how I thought of it. I used to love spending time by myself in churches. It was a phase I went through.

I think the physical side is also taking care of our inner garden. Instead of working on our spirit and soul, we’re working on our physical strength. And guess what. By doing these physical things we’re relieved of anger and stress and we “feel” so very much better in our soul and spirit as well.

Hope this helps

Bob

AFEH

Maybe take a look into martial arts, pick one that has as much about it in the spiritual and soul sense as it does the physical.

Bob

Deejo

I think an activity that lends itself to social interaction with other men would serve you well - including golf mixers.

Guns are good ... just don't add whiskey to the equation. Without adhering to the notion that you want to get in touch with your inner Neanderthal, I definitely support activities that put you a bit closer to your hunter-gatherer roots.

AFEH

That's a really good way of looking at it. I was for decades a hunter gatherer. Then I looked back on my life and could see I'd spent so little time being a farmer, tending to my inner and outer crops.

Hunter gatherer? Farmer? Both? I certainly think time and focus should be spent on both and if we leave one untended for too long that's when things get bad and it's difficult to recover.

It does depend a lot where we are in our life.

Bob

seeking sanity

I've found team sports to be good for me. Not sure how much it is working on myself, other then getting out and having fun sure gets rid of stress. Softball, drop in indoor soccer. Stuff like that. Find a community center in your area.

aedilis

Well if you asked my stepdad, he'd say, "Whiskey and the floozies."

Seriously though, I think manly is in the eye of the beholder. Some guys feel manly by beating up women and drinking. Some guys feel manly by going to the gym 5 days a week. Some feel manly playing softball. Others feel manly by playing video games or gardening or painting pewter figurines. It seriously is something you need to decide on.

So pick out a bunch of various hobbies that your other guy friends do and see which one appeals to you.

I used to play this Live Action Roleplaying Game in my 20s, where I got a rush out of playing a character who was a funny but blunt individual. It gave me a great feeling of control over myself and in return I would feel more confident in my regular day activities.

After that ran its course, I turned to learning how to hunt with my dad and my brother-in-law. Met some mutual friends of my brother-in-law and we all get along well today. I enjoy the time out with them and get the same confident feeling in myself regardless of whether I actually take a deer or not.

Over the last month, I decided on hosting a LAN party (Competitive Computer Gaming Party) for about 16 of my friends. I realized that I needed to make room and organize our basement which looks like the show "Man Caves" meets "Hoarders." Planning the cleanup project with my 13 year old son and starting to clean it out last Sunday really helped me get that confidence feeling I had doing those other activities.

So, to quote the character, Bishop, from the 2005 comedy movie "Waiting":

"..So, when things in your life become stagnant - you know, you're no longer happy with what you're doing - then you figure out what's important to you. Then create your own penis-showing game. "

AFEH

Bob