BigBadWolf

So I have noticed, especially lately, these types of music I am listening to and what I grew up on, what is constructive and what is destructive for being the good man in the relationship.

So being on the "high side" in years of my 30's I guess this will betray my age, but here are some of my thoughts.



Pop music and Rap music for the most part has much influence, some to most dominant man but overemphasize on materialism and putting down women. WIth that said, my wife has played for me some of the rap music she listens to on the radio, and has often said with that look in her eyes that some song (usually some over the top lyric) reminds her of me.


Christina Aguilera - yes.

Over the last few years I think Christian Aguilera message is good. "Ain't no other man" I wish I could put as the background to my profile page!

"You are there when I'm a mess
Talk me down from every ledge
Give me strength, boy you're the best
You're the only one who's ever passed every test

Ain't no other man can stand up next to you
Ain't no other man on the planet does what you do
You're the kinda guy a girl finds in a blue moon
You got soul, you got class, you got style with your bad ass"



Lady Gaga - yes.

I am delighted to see my teenage daughter to listen to Lady GaGa now instead of Miley Cyrus. I often stare at my wife in such a way if "Bad Romance" comes on, and LadyGAGA videos are nothing short of genius in some of the imagery, especially if anyone is of a sort of BDSM and dominance perspective in sexuality, her honesty is beyond her age, and this coming from me as not the biggest fan of most pop music.

"I want your love, and I want your revenge
I want your love, I don't wanna be friends"

INcredible!



ROck music, for the most part, full of bad advice especially the ballads. Feelings sorry, sympathy, these things are very popular and destructive, even so much as these are the songs I grew up on as a teenager in the '80s.

Eric Clapton - no.

Genuis on guitar and one of my favorite performers, mostly horrible on love advice. "Bell Bottom Blues" is a good song for what not to do to be a happy man with a woman.

Kiss - yes.

Nothing for the passive man here, everything practically over the top for manning up. Even the ballads, "Beth", pretty much telling his woman to chill as he will be home when he get's home.

Boston - No.

No matter how excellent this power guitar work and pop rock, the love advice will put any relationship on the fast track to divorce. Case in point, the song "A Man I'll Never Be".

So just lighthearted observations.

HOw about it, what songs and artists are good for manning up and which are to listened to with caution?

nice777guy

BBW -

Sounds like we have a lot in common musically! Always thought Boston sounded like elevator music and that Clapton was overrated.

Hadn't thought of Lady GaGa that way, but do find that her music is something that both the kids and I can agree on - and it has some substance.

Christina is much classier and smarter than her contemporaries (Britney) - but still just as sexy.

I LOVE Kiss as well - saw them when I was 8 - a LONG time ago. But a lot of Kiss songs obviously just treat women as objects and contain a lot over the top sexual innuendo (Love Gun comes quickly to mind).

I still think there's no better "make-out" music than AC/DC or Led Zeppelin.

AC/DC - like Kiss - fairly mindless lyrics and high energy - but a bit more consistent. They've never tried to make a "power ballad" - and even their "bad" songs are still loud and usually a bit dirty. Put Back in Black on and you've got a solid 45 minutes of make-out music.

Led Zeppelin - more soul and substance. Not quite as corny - a lot of it very sexy - Whole Lotta Love, Black Dog.

The energy in these two bands is unmistakable. Good for working out OR sex.

Justin Timberlake is another that my wife LOVES. At first I thought he sounded like bubble-gum pop, but the more I listen, the more I think he's made some good, sexy music, similar to Lady GaGa. And most importantly, it really turned her on to listen to him. It isn't corny, isn't loud, and is at times very sexual. Love the clever lyrics in the new song he sings with Timbaland - Carry-out.

My favorite artist is Bruce Springsteen. But I do find much of his music to be somewhat depressing. Even "upbeat" songs like Born in the USA or Born to Run are a bit dark - very interesting and introspective. But not good if your mood is already somewhat down. So - even though its great music to me - it may not be the best for "Manning-up".

Then of course you have Metallica, Megadeth, Priest, Maiden - great energy - great for workouts - and will probably send a lot of 30 - 40 year old women out of the room! Metallica may have worked in high school, but those days are gone!

Hope I caught the spirit of your thread BBW. Interesting topic - hope you get some more responses.

okeydokie

godsmack - the enemy

BigBadWolf

Thanks for taking the time to reply, very interesting ideas.

Agreed about Christina Aguilera far better than her contemporaries, altough now IMO it will be Lady GaGA and maybe still Beyonce defining the pop genre for now.

38 Special song "Hold on Loosely". No.

I did have a woman tell me in no subtle way this is bad advice and she is not looking to be held loosely but with everything her man has.

Beyonce: "Ego" yes.

"It's on baby, let's get lost
You don't need to call into work 'cause you're the boss
For real, want you to show me how you feel
I consider myself lucky, that's a big deal

Why? Well, you got the key to my heart
But you ain't gonna need it, I'd rather you open up my body
And show me secrets, you didn't know was inside
No need for me to lie

It's too big, it's too wide
It's too strong, it won't fit
It's too much, it's too tough
He talk like this 'cause he can back it up

He got a big ego, such a huge ego
I love his big ego, it's too much
He walk like this 'cause he can back it up

Usually I'm humble, right now I don't choose
You can leave with me or you could have the blues
Some call it arrogant, I call it confident
You decide when you find on what I'm working with"


This is much in attitude for the good man to study in these lyrics!

Feel free to share more ideas.

As for the spirit of the thread, there is nothing wrong with just letting it run and seeing how it goes.

Since it is easy to see the dominant man in movies (Bruce Willis, Will Smith, Jason Statham), and practically impossible on television (the man is typcially shown as a bumbling and needy woman assistant at best ), I am hoping to find in pop and rock music some ideas to share on what is healthy, as music is so important to me and colors much of my time in my vehicle or even working out, to find ways to listen to constructive and kindred spirits and to help avoid destructive ones.