EA already moving towards PA! - Page 7 - Talk About Marriage
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post #91 of 1224 (permalink) Old 02-21-2011, 01:09 PM Thread Starter
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I sent her several of the most damning emails. I'm pretty sure she'll help put a stop to it.

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Hope you sent her the emails!!!!!!
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post #92 of 1224 (permalink) Old 02-21-2011, 01:11 PM
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Re: EA already moving towards PA!

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You ready to call him now?
Also a good idea. That definitely doesn't need to be a long conversation.
"Your wife knows. Back off." *click*
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post #93 of 1224 (permalink) Old 02-21-2011, 01:13 PM Thread Starter
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You ready to call him now?
Do I let the wife handle it? She is going to talk to him soon.
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post #94 of 1224 (permalink) Old 02-21-2011, 01:15 PM
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Re: EA already moving towards PA!

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Do I let the wife handle it? She is going to talk to him soon.
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I don't think you want your wife to talk to this guy...unless its a letter of no contact - or a phone call with you standing right next to her to tell him its totally over.
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post #95 of 1224 (permalink) Old 02-21-2011, 01:23 PM Thread Starter
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I don't think you want your wife to talk to this guy...unless its a letter of no contact - or a phone call with you standing right next to her to tell him its totally over.
I should have said the other mans wife handle the news. They are on vacation with their kids this week and going to tough to get private time.
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post #96 of 1224 (permalink) Old 02-21-2011, 01:23 PM
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Re: EA already moving towards PA!

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Do I let the wife handle it? She is going to talk to him soon.
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Only do what you are comfortable with.

But do keep in mind ... he's going to deny it, and she is going to want to believe that you are delusional, not that her husband is a cheater.

In summary, for me, no, I would not let her handle it. I am actually an advocate of confronting the SOB, but I recognize that this is probably way out of most people's comfort zone, or in some cases may be ill advised.

If what you say about this guy is true? I'd put him on notice that you are prepared to burn down his marriage if he insists on pushing himself into yours, or just use the simple quick phone call I indicated above.
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post #97 of 1224 (permalink) Old 02-21-2011, 01:31 PM
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Re: EA already moving towards PA!

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I guess my question right now is that I'm pretty sure how this is going to go down today. I will be the Alpha Dog and The Rock. How long does it take the wife to come out of the FOG usually? When she does, what can I expect?
MNG, maybe a DS looks like they’re in a fog from an observer’s point of view. It looks like the DS doesn’t know whether to stay or leave, they deceive and lie and blame and deny even the most profoundly obvious things. Anybody observing that type of behaviour may well conclude the DS is in a “fog”.

But is the DS actually in a fog? I for one very much doubt it. Their affair is planned like a seditious military behind the lines operation. And they have all their stories lined up about what to do and say if they get caught. I don’t think the DS is in a fog at all. In fact far from it.

Sounds to make like your DS’s plan is to remain in your “camp” while she tests out the waters in the OM’s camp and she’ll be very clear in her own mind what her plan is and what to do if she gets caught out.

Bob
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post #98 of 1224 (permalink) Old 02-21-2011, 01:40 PM
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Re: EA already moving towards PA!

As much torment and turmoil you can make for the OM the better at this point. I would call him now too!

He wants to mess with your house - bah - he messed with the wrong one - especially since OMW now has the damning evidence too!

Good on you for sticking up for your marriage!

Now - what is your plan for when your wife discovers the exposure?

Plan A Plan A Plan A and keep on investigating until youre sure it's dead!

Careful and hold your tongue - be as calm as you can through this.
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post #99 of 1224 (permalink) Old 02-21-2011, 01:46 PM Thread Starter
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He knows now. Let the fireworks begin.



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As much torment and turmoil you can make for the OM the better at this point. I would call him now too!

He wants to mess with your house - bah - he messed with the wrong one - especially since OMW now has the damning evidence too!

Good on you for sticking up for your marriage!

Now - what is your plan for when your wife discovers the exposure?

Plan A Plan A Plan A and keep on investigating until youre sure it's dead!

Careful and hold your tongue - be as calm as you can through this.
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post #100 of 1224 (permalink) Old 02-21-2011, 01:49 PM
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Re: EA already moving towards PA!

Hey - that took some guts!

You're wife will be pi$$ed - and she'll take it out on you. Just be ready for it.
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post #101 of 1224 (permalink) Old 02-21-2011, 01:56 PM Thread Starter
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great! I'm ready for it and pretty pissed off myself!

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Hey - that took some guts!

You're wife will be pi$$ed - and she'll take it out on you. Just be ready for it.
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post #102 of 1224 (permalink) Old 02-21-2011, 02:00 PM
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Re: EA already moving towards PA!

MNG,

Congrats on the first day of the rest of your life.

You stood tall.
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post #103 of 1224 (permalink) Old 02-21-2011, 02:03 PM
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Re: EA already moving towards PA!

You might want to post some of this in the Infidelity section.

You've stopped, or at least slowed down a potential affair.

But you also need to start thinking about how to get your wife back and making sure this never happens again. Or making sure that she doesn't go right back to him when he comes home from vacation.

So - at this point - I'm not sure that being pi$$ed will help you much.
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post #104 of 1224 (permalink) Old 02-21-2011, 02:09 PM
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Re: EA already moving towards PA!

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great! I'm ready for it and pretty pissed off myself!


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MNG,

Don't spit the bit now!

Time to really stand tall. You are not going to fight her about this. Cool, detached, calm. You hold all the aces. Let her throw the temper tantrum. Show her how ineffective it is.

DO NOT ENGAGE.

"How is this helpful?"

"I don't like where this is headed"

"You would never accept this sort of treatment from me..."

All dead cold and without your pulse even moving.
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post #105 of 1224 (permalink) Old 02-21-2011, 02:20 PM Thread Starter
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I've been through so much with her the past couple weeks I've become somewhat detached from it all. Not much she can say that will phase me at this point!

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MNG,

Don't spit the bit now!

Time to really stand tall. You are not going to fight her about this. Cool, detached, calm. You hold all the aces. Let her throw the temper tantrum. Show her how ineffective it is.

DO NOT ENGAGE.

"How is this helpful?"

"I don't like where this is headed"

"You would never accept this sort of treatment from me..."

All dead cold and without your pulse even moving.
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