Help with new husband and porn

swedish · 09-10-2008, 05:34 PM

Newlywed...That's great that you are both now in a place where you can talk about it...good luck tonight and let us know how it goes

Deejo · 09-10-2008, 07:34 PM

The things we need to talk about most, are generally the things we want to talk about least. I hope your conversation is productive and you are both able to take something away from it as a result. It needn't be a resolution, but it should be something equitable. I I wish you well.

stepmomandwife08 · 11-20-2008, 10:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by martino

I couldn't disagree more. It all depends on the function of the porn. A lot of women watch porn as well. This is why I asked what kind of porn he is watching. There is some real disgusting porn out there and some of quality as well that does not degrade women.

Thats so very true theres good porn and theres bad porn and heck i like porn..BUT when it starts to turn the marriage sour is when its time to put back the movies and put the attention back to where it should be.It depends on the people in the marriage..some people just cant stand the thought of porn and some people LOVE it but it and other things can turn bad if you dont watch out..you have to find that happy medium...Okay ill shut up now!

LMcP08 · 11-21-2008, 01:47 PM

I know you wanted a reply from a guy not a girl like me but I think I have something you may benefit from.
Your husband loves you and is still attracted to you. I think in a lot of cases it's like an escape from reality for a short time to them. It is nothing to take personally, although it's easier said than done.
I was in the same situation as you. I figured if I can't beat it then join it. I bought some porn channels and we watched together one night and I think it's good for our relationship every once in a while.
I am not saying that you should try that if you are not comfortable with it at all but in my case I acted like I was interested in the same thing as him and he felt better knowing that he didn't have to sneak behind my back and I felt better being included. Although he still looks at it alone too, like a way for him to wind down after work or just an escape or something.
Just whatever you do, don't take it personally. He loves you or he wouldn't have married you. Guys are just so different about some things and we may never be able to understand it but we can choose to accept it or fight it. Either way we don't really win.