STOP this immediately!
You are not the servant to your woman.
Your "love" is not based on how much hoops you are jumping through for your woman.
Stop looking for validation or approval from your woman.
YOu hold down a job, support your family, take care of household maintenance, why would you even begin to imagine you are needing some woman to decree wether you are a "bum" or not!
Causing conflict you say? Well is that a bad thing? OF course not!
You need to stop wondering how much hoops you should be jumping through, and instead do these things:
Learn about "fitness tests" from this marriage forum website, and look up "Sh!t tests" outside this websight, and understand what these are and how to pass them.
Learn to embrace conflict with enthusiasm, and how doing this increases respect from your woman.
Learn to view your woman's "if you love me then you'll ... (insert task)" statements with amusement and humor, and never take them literally.
Fact of the matter, it is the same ANYTIME your woman attempts to be your boss, your taskmaster, your supervisor or in any way attempts to place herself above you, simply view such vanity with amusement and respond with wit and humor.
Finally, if your home somehow needs renovating, then decide so from your own decision and leadership and work your plan from there.
A man working from his own leadership and decision, is winning the respect of his woman and not building up resentment in himself.
I wish you well.
Originally Posted by Ten_year_hubby View Post
I work a pretty standard job from 9-5 Monday through Friday with a 40 minute commute each direction. If my wife had her preference, I would spend Friday night and 9-9 Saturday and Sunday working on home improvement projects. While she sits around reading the paper, talking on the phone and hanging out.
I am a Christian man but when I read the Bible and review our wedding vows, I not really seeing much specifically about home improvement being my responsibility. Yes, I fix toilets and sinks, install switches and minor fixtures. In the past I painted nine rooms but there is always a lot more to do, believe me.
My problem is that I'm not much in the mood to do this stuff and that is causing a conflict. W is saying that if I loved her I would blah blah blah, but I'm really not on board with it.
So the question here is how much do I need to do to avoid looking like a lazy ineffectual lout but not get myself tied up to the point where I get resentful?