I enjoy talking to men, even strangers I am comfortable chatting with, and I can be very friendly, What saves me is-- I am married and off limits anyway. So I guess I can get away with it, husband is always right there beside me.
Many women are afraid to be too nice because some GUYS do get the wrong idea, especially if they are really lonely and looking for some attention. Guys have this problem too, they never want to show any attention to the girls they do not like for fear they will get the wrong idea !
YOu just never know what is lurking in soemeone's mind. IN some cultures, maybe within some churches even , women are taught to never pursue men, but wait for the man to come to them, let them speak first.
Southbound --just take the RISK, ask, it is what a man should do if he is interested. If it fails, so what, try again with someone new another day. Happiness is worth the risk !
And women, there is nothing at all wrong with being friendly, of coarse if you know the man has a bad reputation, a stalker, or he is mental, try to avoid his gaze by all means !
But otherwise, if they get the wrong idea just by a smile and some talking, they are delusional. (Women also here) Seriously ! If this is the case, I would have all kinds of men thinking I am coming on to them. Holy cow I can be exceptionally friendly if someone starts a conversaton with me -cause I like to BS , and I talk can talk about alot more than the weather .
Some people are just "friendly" by nature, most especially the SANGUINE personality types.
One thing is if you are friendly and they feel it is more somehow, asking you out, just don't fake it, I mean, I have seen this too many times, girls wanting to be nice, not hurt the guys feelings too much, but letting him get the wrong idea, stringing him along - Women need to set them straight to not waste their time, energies and fantasies.
It would suck for anyone to hold out Hope when there is none. So women, he careful how you handle these more vulnerable men . Be real ! I know from talking to my one male friend, he says he would rather you talk -be forward about enjoying his FRIENDSHIP but likes when the women tells him point blank -this is the end of the line, it won't go any further. Rather than ignore he exists, or leave him hanging in limbo guessing -when there is no hope. He had a woman do that to him, he wasted years praying, hoping for more- they did many things together, close friends, she just wanted friendship ONLY but never told him this, she used him for other things (painting her house, hauling things), kinda made him feel like he was in the "running" - so he was crushed terribly, why he now appreciates those who tell him outright.
MY son was told "I just want to be friends" by the girl he is in love with at college and he has a very hard head, he is still holding out hope, after a year ! I give the girl credit for not stringing him along and still being a good close friend to him -but I keep getting on him to move along.
Getting to know people can be "messy". But life would be no fun without it.