Update... looks like we're on silent treatment phase. She asked me if I had anything to say to her (obviously waiting for an apology), I told her no (not going to indulge her in this way).
Regardless, it seems:
- She's p-ssed off that I see her as weak
- She's p-ssed off that I'm an insensitive jerk
- She's p-ssed off that what I did for her the previous night was a game
- She's p-ssed off that I apparently started this fight
And of course... most probably...
- She's p-ssed off that I'm a proud stubborn a$$
- She's p-ssed off that I've waited so long to deal with my insensitivity
And now of course... most probably
- She's p-ssed off that I didn't apologise to her just then
So now I have to think of a way to make up while dealing with all of the above... hmmm...
Ok... if I just go up to her and admit that I've been insensitive she's just going to jump at me for treating her like a little girl. So scratch that. Ok, alright I'm going to start it then by telling her honestly that she really showed me up the other night, and that I respect what she did, THEN admit to her that I've been insensitive. Ok, phase one planned.
Phase two... I'll let it flow, otherwise it'll be too planned and she'll see it. After that I'll apologise, for my behaviour, me being an a$$, and if I do it right, following the steps accordingly she might even apologise for what she pulled but I'll stop her when that happens. To be honest, if she had made this easy on me I wouldn't love her this much.
At least I can identify what she's p-ssed off at now, and counter all of it in one go. But no, I think I'm done with fitness testing her, she did indeed show me. I'm going to let her know that honestly. You guys are right, our marriage is not healthy.
Considering we have enough external issues to deal with, neglected issues, this is just not going to work like this. If anything, we should be taking the p-ss at the world ignorantly trying to break us apart due to the color of our skins or our religious differences or our diverse cultures.
Now... just the timing in question. This may very well be our last internal fight, we've solved everything else and come a long way. Things that I never thought would be solved... such as her sexual demands. Wish me luck people, for our make up.
This confused me. So - are you normally the target of her aggression? Or is she upset about other things and just venting?
No, I've always let her vent on me, which means I let her hit me. She doesn't hit me in painful areas, just my shoulders/arms mostly while I'm holding her close. I've encouraged it, in a way it actually turns me on too.
Hell she even smacked the crap outta me when we were both playing Dragon Age together and her toon got dumped by an NPC and she blamed me for not telling her and that I ruined her awesome story she was directing
This may very well be our last internal fight, we've solved everything else and come a long way. Things that I never thought would be solved... such as her sexual demands. Wish me luck people, for our make up.
Your "last internal fight"? This isn't optimistic?
I don't think the wife likes this turmoil, I think it's all she knows.
If someone (especially my husband) was always trying to irritate me (or take the piss outta me), I'd be on guard and not like him much. This would make me defensive ALL.The.Time. I wouldn't want to look weak because he'll just tease me. I wouldn't want to be vulnerable because it's just ridiculed.