My boyfriend's d!ck gets very hard - Page 2 - Talk About Marriage
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post #16 of 53 (permalink) Old 01-05-2017, 11:11 PM
Lon
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Re: My boyfriend's d!ck gets very hard

Better an imaginary hard one than an imaginary limp one (or maybe even a real life limp one).

never knowingly appropriate
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post #17 of 53 (permalink) Old 01-06-2017, 08:14 AM
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Re: My boyfriend's d!ck gets very hard

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Originally Posted by ne9907 View Post
Why? His d!ck gets so hard, it feels as he is impaling me!

Yeah, it is a joke...... I do not have a boyfriend.
In situations like this it can be important to know your boyfriend's "turn offs" and apply them as needed, much like a train engineer monitoring the boiler of a steam engine. Think how cats furiously hate a spritz of water to the face, mix up an iced solution of diluted vinegar with some salt and throw a whole glass of this in your boyfriends face next time he gets too hard. It should distract him just enough that intercourse will return to normal. Whatever you do, do NOT pinch his nipples.

Cheers,
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post #18 of 53 (permalink) Old 01-06-2017, 08:32 AM
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Re: My boyfriend's d!ck gets very hard

I think I found your boyfriend ...

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post #19 of 53 (permalink) Old 01-06-2017, 08:39 AM
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Re: My boyfriend's d!ck gets very hard

Nothing gets attention like a d!ck thread.


Well maybe a boob thread.


Oh and a vag thread

And a BJ thread

Anal maybe too?

Yep that should do it.

"Masturbate with just a slick hand and thoughts of your wife." --Intheory
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post #20 of 53 (permalink) Old 01-06-2017, 09:02 AM
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Re: My boyfriend's d!ck gets very hard

@EllisRedding... now that is funny although I hope this is not sold in a Toys R Us. :P
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post #21 of 53 (permalink) Old 01-06-2017, 09:23 AM
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Re: My boyfriend's d!ck gets very hard

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@EllisRedding... now that is funny although I hope this is not sold in a Toys R Us. :P


Amazon sells it.
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post #22 of 53 (permalink) Old 01-06-2017, 09:35 AM Thread Starter
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Re: My boyfriend's d!ck gets very hard

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In situations like this it can be important to know your boyfriend's "turn offs" and apply them as needed, much like a train engineer monitoring the boiler of a steam engine. Think how cats furiously hate a spritz of water to the face, mix up an iced solution of diluted vinegar with some salt and throw a whole glass of this in your boyfriends face next time he gets too hard. It should distract him just enough that intercourse will return to normal. Whatever you do, do NOT pinch his nipples.

Cheers,
Badsanta
I have been spritzing him with water only and yelling "down boy!" but doesn't work.... I shall add some vinegar in the water~

EDIT: I hope you all know I am totally kidding... I love me a hard d!ck

I say Left, but mean Purple
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post #23 of 53 (permalink) Old 01-06-2017, 09:38 AM
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Re: My boyfriend's d!ck gets very hard

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Amazon sells it.
I knew you would search for it!
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post #24 of 53 (permalink) Old 01-06-2017, 09:43 AM
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Re: My boyfriend's d!ck gets very hard

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Originally Posted by ne9907 View Post
I have been spritzing him with water only and yelling "down boy!" but doesn't work.... I shall add some vinegar in the water~

EDIT: I hope you all know I am totally kidding... I love me a hard d!ck
It is an interesting twist... will probably have a lot of pages by tonight for all the right reasons.
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post #25 of 53 (permalink) Old 01-06-2017, 09:46 AM
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Re: My boyfriend's d!ck gets very hard

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So, what's the perfect size hard d!ck? 6-7"?
In real life or on the internet?




Sigh, my wife gives me the speaking treatment.
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post #26 of 53 (permalink) Old 01-06-2017, 09:53 AM
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Re: My boyfriend's d!ck gets very hard

Just hope your hard **** doesn't become a slick Willie!

"You are talking about the nonsensical ravings of a lunatic mind!" Victor Von Frankenstein
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post #27 of 53 (permalink) Old 01-06-2017, 10:04 AM
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Re: My boyfriend's d!ck gets very hard

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Originally Posted by ne9907 View Post
I have been spritzing him with water only and yelling "down boy!" but doesn't work.... I shall add some vinegar in the water~

EDIT: I hope you all know I am totally kidding... I love me a hard d!ck
Most people joke as a way to hide their true feelings, so it is OK and understandable that you may actually have a fetish with things that are are not so rigid. There are a number of women that enjoy ramping up female hormones and supplements in their husband's diet as a way to counteract testosterone and make him more "flexible" in the bedroom.

It can be as simple as ramping up soy in his diet as soybeans produce natural equivalents to female hormones.


Badsanta

EDIT: I know your joking, but sometimes jokes are a fun way to learn!
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post #28 of 53 (permalink) Old 01-06-2017, 10:05 AM
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Re: My boyfriend's d!ck gets very hard

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EDIT: I hope you all know I am totally kidding... I love me a hard d!ck
Try peeing with one
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post #29 of 53 (permalink) Old 01-06-2017, 10:06 AM
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Re: My boyfriend's d!ck gets very hard

You think he could chisel granite with that thing? I was thinking of putting in new kitchen counters and could use an assist......
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post #30 of 53 (permalink) Old 01-06-2017, 10:16 AM
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Re: My boyfriend's d!ck gets very hard

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Amazon sells it.
The box says it's great for office parties!! Lol. The next day, HR hosts a mandatory meeting for employees "Dealing with inappropriate behavior at work ".

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