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post #16 of 26 (permalink) Old 01-10-2017, 08:18 AM
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Re: I am trapped in a relationship.

Originally Posted by jld View Post
Also consider getting a restraining order.
QFT...this will really show her true colors. You take it to this step, anyone who isn't BSC will back down and if she doesn't, well, better you find that out now and change you name and move to another state.
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post #17 of 26 (permalink) Old 01-10-2017, 08:30 AM
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Re: I am trapped in a relationship.

Where in the commonwealth are you located @official_jay?
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post #18 of 26 (permalink) Old 01-10-2017, 08:53 AM
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Re: I am trapped in a relationship.

Try looking up clingers. There are multiple stages.

Did she initiate contact with you first, does she have stalker-like behavior?

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post #19 of 26 (permalink) Old 01-10-2017, 11:28 AM
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Re: I am trapped in a relationship.

Women can be physical abusers just like men can.

She is an abuser, plain and simple, and you need to leave. If you think she represents a physical danger, call the police - really. This is no joke, and not a marginal case.

Ignore her threats about calling your workplace. Any reasonable workplace is going to ignore claims by a angry vengeful dumped romantic partner.

You have every right to file charges for her attacks, but in practice it may be difficult to make them stick. Still the threat is more serious than her threats to accuse you of drug use.

On the off chance that you do actually use pot, stop so that you will not fail a drug test. Do not admit to drug use on any forum or public site.

Originally Posted by official_jay View Post
she would scratch my neck or even punch me in the face
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post #20 of 26 (permalink) Old 01-10-2017, 01:29 PM
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Re: I am trapped in a relationship.

She can tell your boss whatever she wants, without proof, her word is meaningless especially since it would be coming from a jilted ex girlfriend.

As far as threats of violence towards your car go, try to put it somewhere safe and put a web camera on it. If she does anything you can have her arrested and ultimately she'll be forced to make restitution- that means she pays for it.

What's the alternative? Stay with her forever because you're afraid of what she might do?

Sometimes you just gotta say "What the f^&k" and just go for it.
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post #21 of 26 (permalink) Old 01-10-2017, 03:52 PM
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I am trapped in a relationship.

Your making bad decisions that will mess up your future. Move in with your family/friends quite smoking, and dump your girlfriend.

How old are you? You need to start thinking about your future and what you want your life to be like in 10-20-30 years.!

Last edited by katiecrna; 01-10-2017 at 03:56 PM.
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post #22 of 26 (permalink) Old 01-10-2017, 04:28 PM
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Re: I am trapped in a relationship.

Originally Posted by official_jay View Post
And then risk losing my Job, and being homeless?

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Talk to your employer or someone in the Human Relations department, if your employer has one. Explain your situation calmly. Then go to your police department and ask for a meeting with one of the sergeants. Tell them the same story. If she hits you again, call the police. I myself would hate to do this but it is in your best interests. She has flipped out. Find out what is going on with her. She is going through some sort of psychological changes, or you are withholding some key information from us. You may be seeing the beginning of Borderline Personality Disorder. This sometimes presents itself in one's twenties. Was she on anti-anxiety medications before and now has gone off of them?
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post #23 of 26 (permalink) Old 01-10-2017, 06:48 PM
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Re: I am trapped in a relationship.

Originally Posted by jld View Post
Why encouraging him to escalate this?

Just get out and move on, OP. And check what legal protection may be available to you. A domestic violence shelter may be helpful with that.
Let it escalate!

Why am I encouraging him? Seriously OP needs to get over his fear, he can't keep thinking about what may or may not happen, he simply has to do what he has to do
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post #24 of 26 (permalink) Old 01-11-2017, 12:03 PM
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Re: I am trapped in a relationship.

Get a restraining order against her so that she stays away and then if she messes with your job, sue her and you will win. You sound like she is dominating you both physically and mentally. Perhaps you like it since you seem to be finding excuses to not leave her. Save some money for a new flat so you will not be homeless. Stay with a friend or family member. Get a new job. Man up for gosh sake. I walked away from two bad relationships in my younger days and even joined the Army to get away from one. That solved my housing and job problem for two years. The second time I moved in with my parents and had no job. I found a new job and got an apartment. I did not find reason why not to leave those women. I found solutions, even if I did not like them.

Many prefer to drown in a pool of their own morality rather than seek the safety of a different morality.
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post #25 of 26 (permalink) Old 01-12-2017, 09:48 PM
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Re: I am trapped in a relationship.

Im gonna tell you a story. take from it whatever you choose

Theres this organisation im involved in. Helps less fortunate families so they can have a home, i would go on weekends and help people with the construction was a voluntary thing. There was one place i went, young girl (25 years old) with 4 kids trying her best to make ends meet and provide for her children. Her common law husband was an absoloute waste, alcoholic , abusive, violent. wouldnt even give her money for the children . But she tried, she had no family, friends and where she lived was around the guys family and friends, no one she couldve turned to.

A day i stayed back a little bit to help her run some electrical lines in the little shack they were staying, her husband came in drunk and aggresive, saying the worst thing to her and there children and me. was really sad i didnt want truble so i left. I talked to her and gave her some advice would chat with her now and again and heres what she did. She didnt have any education, any skills or qualifications. She got a job at a grocery cleaning and packing shelves ( sh*t pay) but she scraped every dollar together.

She stayed in the emotional , physical and blood sucking relationship for about 20 months. Got enough money to rent a place and she took her kids. Left his stupid ass, put a restraining order on him and he's paying child support. Right now she's still at the grocery but shes a cashier, shes doing a nursing course and she's extremely happy.

It doesnt matter your situation you can get out of it. Be smart and be a bit patient sometimes things are that hard but as corny as this may sound you have to be strong for yourself, because no one else will be strong for you. So all the best to you bruh.

P.S .. Her ex common law husband is still an ass and is miserable. lucky enough i met him at the beach and beat the shi* outve him. I was not proud but i was happy lol. Thats for calling me a fagg*t and talking about my beautiful loving mother.
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post #26 of 26 (permalink) Old 01-13-2017, 02:39 PM
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Re: I am trapped in a relationship.

You get out of life what you put into it. What are you putting into your life thats positive?
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