I would suggest reading the book Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus.
In that book, the author explains the concepts of caving and rubberbanding.
Caving is the time a man (or woman) needs to feed his soul. He explains that men need alone time for hobbies or just to let go of everything in their minds through reading or watching sports or whatever. He explains it in a way that made me really understand my husband's need to cave sometimes. It doesn't refer to an actual man cave or physical space, it is a mental space. But typically the man does require some time completely alone to get to his mental cave, and that may include going to a physical cave.
Rubberbanding is part of the intimacy cycle most males experience. Men love to pursue and get the girl. Then once they have her, they get very close to her and allow themselves to be open and vulnerable through intimacy. Then after this deep intimacy, the man feels the need to pull away, ie: rubberbanding. This pulling away comes from the man's natural desire to feel his own autonomy again after feeling that deep intimacy (women sometimes do this, too). The author explains that this is normal and is not due to fear of intimacy, but rather comes from the very healthy desire to be autonomous, (even though also remain committed and monogamous). So after a time of close intimacy with a woman, which could be just one evening or maybe a long romantic vacation, the man will frequently automatically pull away for a short time afterwards and he may go to his cave. When a man can feel his autonomy again after rubberbanding, he then feels the desire to be close and intimate again, so he pursues his woman again. When he does this, he may actually come rushing back toward her. Thus the pulling away and then snapping back, ie: a rubberband.
These concepts certainly apply to a lot of women, and don't apply to all men. But as a woman who has been with men who absolutely did exactly what the book described about caving and rubberbanding, it was an excellent resource for me and I have a much better understanding of men ever since reading it.
The author also described how most women respond to caving and rubberbanding...most of us feel hurt, slighted, abandoned, and pissed. Especially rubberbanding, because it comes after close intimacy. To a woman it can feel like "how could he get so close to me and then suddenly pull back so far?" The woman will sometimes then chase the man, asking for answers, demanding a good reason for his pulling away. She may do this while he is just caving, too.
When I fully understood that doing any kind of chasing or shaming of my man while he was caving or rubberbanding, I stopped shooting myself in the foot like that. I was able to just say to myself "I get it, he wants to feel his autonomy again" and I would then relish in feeling my own autonomy again, too. I would do my own thing and not worry anymore about why he pulled away. I knew he would come snapping back to me once his rubberband had stretched out far enough, and he always did. In fact, it was excellent, because we could then play the pursuit game over and over, which is so much fun. You can't pursue someone if they are not at least a tiny distance away from you....so caving and rubberbanding are the perfect way to keep just enough distance to allow him to pursue me again.
Some men of course are not really rubberbanding and caving, they are just neglecting or ignoring their wives. If that is the case, then the book won't help and could actually hurt because it may make a man think this is ok and blame it on caving or rubberbanding. But from your first post, I assume that isn't you.
If you read the book and got the concepts down, you would also learn a lot about her in the process. And if she would read it with you, you two could learn them together and support each other more. https://www.amazon.com/Men-Mars-Wome.../dp/0060574216