Have you noticed that most of the guys on this thread who advocate not paying for dates are all liv ing with absolutely gorgeous women who are sexually attracted to them exclusively and insist on paying whenever they go out.
I'm not living with my girlfriend. Maybe in a couple more years we'll take that step, but neither of us are ready for that yet. We both have kids, we've both had terrible relationships in the past, and we're doing what we feel right is for us by waiting.
I don't give a **** whether you believe me or not.
I've had this very discussion with my girlfriend in the past. And she is quite sympathetic to the mixed messages men get. She has absolutely no problem going dutch, because she's independent and makes just as much money as I do. It doesn't matter whether you believe it or not. What does matter is that she and I are compatible in that regard.
It also goes to show that men can still be successful in dating and relationships without following the traditional paradigm.
It's your money. Spend it however you want. Likewise, I spend my money however I want. Sometimes I choose to spend it in her, and sometimes I don't.
But sex isn't contingent on the amount of money I spend on her. What she craves more is my love, care, and devotion.
You know, the things that actually make a successful relationship.